To build a sustinable community
Are you looking for Community or Friends? You can look for both, it's not an either or, but its important to know. Attemps of creating a community can be stalled and/or fall flat by mixed expectaions. Friends are part of our community, but not every comunity member needs to be or is a friend.
What are your personal values and needs? A lot of people complain they're not able to form friendships once out of school. School or work based comunity/friends are based on mandatory spaces. If you are aware of your values and needs, you can actively search out people with the same ones outside of these spaces. Establish a list of non-negotiables for you to be able to set boundaries and leave the space if they are not met.
What's your capacity for meeting new people? Seeking community, means seeking comfort, security and saefty. This comes with expectations. Be aware how much you can and will give in terms of eg. time, resources, emotional intimacy etc. and communicate these.
Whats your preferred method of interacting? A sustainable community requires communication and time spent together. Think about your preferences of being more online or in person. Ifyou are more online, do you actively paricipate in a mutual gathering or are you part of a parasocial relationship.
What are your relationship managment skills? Being part of a community means being in alingment with other people. That also means, knowing how you personally handle conflict, and if you are able to negtiate and commmunicate your needs. Are you reliable and in what way? Can you probem solve in group dynamics? There is nothing wrong with having weaknesses in these areas, but it will influence the groups dynamic.
What are your interests and hobbies? Mapp out your interests, hobbies and things you want to do but have neve tried before. Try to focus on things not relying on consumerism, as these are open to a more wider range of people. Connect to others with the same values and needs by seeking out these hobbies and interests.
Now seek out your people. Be awkward. Be brave. And if your answers to all the questions above revealed that you just can't, thats fine, too. Building a community takes time and sometimes one or two false starts that help refining your list of values and wants. But if you are able to, and want to, you need to actively search out others, now that you have identifed who they suposed to be.
------------------------------------------------------------------------------ Small Linkspam on topic:
@luulapants gives advice on what do you do if the mutual aid groups/communitys around you seem to have dissolved or don't have consistent recurring meetings.
@alotofnot talks about being a passive envireonmetalist as an example of a person not having reosuces to be politically active in the way they are told to.
@victoryofthecommonse talks about how to build solidarity with social anxiety
This video by @andrew-ism explains the concept of mutual aid
A few years ago I wrote a list of things to research in your local community that also might help finding you people
This post talks about burnout in activism, which is something everyone needs be able to recogise in themselves as well as other members of their community
I insist you feel free to add to the discussion or resources.
Turn anger into kindness. ~ @acesolaris
Version 07.11.2024













