#copywritingelective

[thefavouritechild]

VESPA ‘ELECTRIC’ - FUCK THAT

Our homework task was to rename the Vespa Elettrica in 3 ways - One for men, one for women, one that’s unisex. The begin research for this, I looked at Vespa itself - it’s current ranges and it’s history. Vespa has always named it’s scooters something Italian, and I wanted to try and keep with that as much as possible, at least in the aesthetic of the word, as this seemed like an important part of their branding and identity. They pride themselves on being free and being for speed, boasting about their racing ties. 

I then split up by demographic, looking at why men AREN’T buying Vespa’s, and why women ARE buying vespas, as it seems as though their main demographic of buyers is women - so what isn’t appealing to men? I found a website that’s dedicated to all things manly  (hyperlinked for your viewing pleasure) and telling men what’s manly, helping them to protect their maniliness (yes, websites like these actually exist) - on this site, it had an entire article dictating why men are not attracted to Vespa’s, and mostly, it’s because they’re feminine in both appearance and sound. Yes, sound. That is apparently a bit thing for guys. Sound. Vespa’s don’t make that sexy and ‘I’ve got a massive schlong’ vroom vroom that a motorcycle does. 

Women on the other hand are attracted to Vespa’s on account of the idea of the perfect, idyllic Italian summer thats romanticised in movies. They want the scooter through the cobbled streets with a scarf around their head, and they want the sexy Italian man that sweeps them off their feet in a steamy romance. They want the adventure, the fantasy.

WOMEN:

CREATIVE RATIONALE:

Capturing the sound of Italy, whilst promising an immersion in life. Using the newfound soundlessness of the Vespa to give women the fantasy of plunging into life and living through their surroundings in an ethereal, escapist way.

MEN:

CREATIVE RATIONALE:

Challenging the perception of loud = big, and inverting the need for sound as compensation to make it so that men feel threatened by loud engines, as if it outs them as making up for what they don’t have. Promoting silence as confidence.

UNISEX:

CREATIVE RATIONALE:

A feeling you can’t describe, a feeling you have to experience for yourself - highlighting Vespa as the vehicle that lets you live the journey, not just take it, and bringing silence into the forefront by painting sound as the wall that blocks us from seeing the small wonders of every day life.

FEEDBACK - INDIVIDUAL AND CLASS:

My feedback was that the line for the women’s vespa - ‘For those quiet nights out’ - is not really a tagline for the brand, or this scooter, but rather it’s the tagline for a campaign, or the idea for a campaign. It’s good, just not for what I was using it for. 

[thefavouritechild]

AD REDO - WWF ‘FISH FORWARD’

After agonising for literally an entire lesson over which ad to choose and discovering my mind goes completely blank when under pressure and I know hardly any brands at all (at least ones that do print ads), so I ended up having one picked for me so I could escape my crippling indecision. The ad chosen for me was WWF’s really shit ad, Fish Forward:

The headings I chose to use for my creative territories/tone of voice chart were:

URGENCY

CHEEKY/HUMOROUS

POSITIVE/FUTURE ACTION

I could only think of three, sue me.

PLAN SPAM:

OUTCOME:

FEEDBACK:

The feedback for my ad redo wasn’t overall positive, mostly negative, but in the constructive way not the way that makes you want to cry and quit and forever remember the person who ruined your life in the hope that one day you’ll cross paths again and they’ll be having a shit time. No, it was good feedback, just not feedback that said my ad was good. My ads didn’t really clearly communicate a message, and couldn’t be completely understood - though I had tested them on my parents and grandparents and friends, that was only the written version, I had never tested them with the image and together the two didn’t work. The copy also didn’t reflect the urgency of the issue, but rather seemed reassuring, telling the audience that they can continue their current behaviour because there’s no immediate threat. Whoops, sorry WWF. 

[thefavouritechild]

MANIFESTO: THE FINALE

MY COMPLETED MANIFESTO AND VOICE RECORDING(s)

It’s good to be a bit Wimpy.

We value quality, not quantity -

McDonald’s may do real fast food, sure, but we do real food, fast. 

We’re not a chain, we’re a family -

We keep our doors open late so that you always feel welcome.

We’re a bit Wimpy like that.

Our burgers are not just burgers,

They’re burgers you can’t get anywhere else.

We let our food speak for itself, we don’t speak for it. 

100% British Beef, cooked the way you like it -

Whether that’s charred or pink, we won’t judge.

We’re a bit Wimpy like that.

Our menu changes are few and far between; 

When you want a Big Bender, we’ll give you a Big Bender,

When you want a Pepsi Float, we’ll give you a Pepsi Float.

Whatever the day, whatever the decade.

Your favourites will never disappear.

We’re proud to be a bit Wimpy like that.

HEADLINE: ‘It’s good to be a bit Wimpy’

SIGN OFF/TAGLINE: ‘We’re proud to be a bit Wimpy like that.’ VOICE RECORDING ONE: MY MOTHERS VOICE VOICE RECORDING TWO: MY BROTHERS VOICE

I recorded my manifesto twice using two different people - my brothers always been confident and cocky, and the way he tells stories he’s able to capture others tone of voice and invite people into the tale as if they were there. He’d make a good comic, he’s good with timing, so I thought using his voice would make for an effective voiceover. However, he’s a bit shit at taking direction, and didn’t put emphasis on the right places. My mother, however, put emphasis on all the places I wanted her to, but her delivery was a little weak in some places - she doesn’t have as strong of a presence as my brother, and I only used her voice originally because my brother was being a raging dick about doing it at first, and she offered to save my ass.  So, bottom line, I can’t choose, so you get both. Enjoy.

[thefavouritechild]

MANIFESTO: TAKE 2

...and 3, and 4, and 5, and 6-

ANOTHER ATTEMPT AT WRITING ABOUT MYSELF:

YET ANOTHER ATTEMPT AT WRITING ABOUT MYSELF:

Posting these here because I value showing my progress, but also trusting you to never show this to anyone else because they’re embarrassing as fuck and I hate them. It’s hard to write about yourself, no matter how I tried to do it I just ended up sounding like a damn prophet preaching to the masses from my little pedestal. It felt uncomfortable and like I was a know it all. Maybe one day I’ll try again, but for now I’ve gone off myself for a bit.

GIVING UP AND CHOOSING WIMPY:

REDOING WIMPY:

Paul’s feedback of my first Wimpy draft is that it’s too negative - in order to try and push the ‘we’re a bit Wimpy’ idea I actually made them sound pathetic and bigged up the competition, making Paul fancy a Maccas. Not ideal. The ‘We’re a bit Wimpy’ can be used in a contrasting way - calling them Wimpy about actually good traits. So I tried again:

[thefavouritechild]

COPYWRITING ELECTIVE - DAY EIGHT

DISCOVERING PAUL IS MY FATHER (and beginning manifestos)

LECTURE NOTES:

STARTING MY MANIFESTO:

The initial struggle I always face, like I did with the ad-redo homework, is choosing the brand I want to work with. In real life, this will be a lot easier, because I won’t get much of a choice, but when the world is your oyster you suddenly discover you care very little about quite a lot, to the point that you have no fond attachment to any brands. Or at least not any small brands, I clearly don’t support local businesses like the online-shopping hermit I am.  So, my limited investment in my community left me with the choices of an outdated fast food joint, a cupcake shop that’s super overpriced, and a woman’s house that she uses as a rescue to claim she’s not a cat lady.  Oh, and myself. 

The only two that stuck out from this selection as interesting were Wimpy, and myself (hah, ego much?) - but then I couldn’t decide. 

So I asked Paul. Turns out, asking Paul equals 5 seconds of asking your question, and then a subsequent 10-20 minutes of completely off topic discussions, wherein which I learnt that he wrote an article on why Jewish men are punching above their weight which pissed off a lot of Jewish men (namely because he’s right, my dad and mum are proof of that, though Jack, who is also Jewish, disagreed. Surprise surprise.), that he hates racism (always a good thing in my book), and that he is quite possibly my father. We bonded over our world views and our lack of care of alcohol but absolute love for Pina Coladas, and he asked me what my mum was doing 21 years and 9 months ago. I said I shall ask. 

Then he found out I liked cats and disowned me. On the bright side, he said I was a very interesting person, and to do my manifesto about me. Lost my dad, but gained an inch on my head. My initial thoughts were to, rather than write straight up about myself such as ‘Hi my name is Emily and blah blah blah bore the audience’, I would take something I feel strongly about and write about that instead. Initially, I floated to Paul that I could write about Emily as a collective, inspired by the Facebook group I’m in called ‘A group where you can only be Emily’, but he said it’d be hard to capture all Emily’s in 150 words. So I decided to write about the world view of writing.

Brian’s feedback of this is that it really lacks a message - what are people reading it for? What am I trying to get them to do? Write? Look further than what they’re told in schools? Know why I write?

[thefavouritechild]

COPYWRITING ELECTIVE - DAY SEVEN

WHO ARE MANIFESTOS FOR?

WHO ARE MANIFESTOS FOR? - LECTURE NOTES:

DIESEL - BE STUPID:

The Diesel manifesto was a bit on the edgy side - it was clear what they were trying to do, make themselves relatable and down to Earth, but it didn’t exactly translate to the page. It came across a bit like Boris Johnson trying to slum it with the kids he’s deprived of food and heating, skirting around the fact that actually, they’re not on the same level. It was also a bit heavy-worded - it took a long time to say a short point. 

APPLE - DIFFERENT TOGETHER:

Apple’s manifesto was similar to Diesel’s in it’s underlying message, which was that you don’t have to fit the societal norms, and in fact, don’t. However, Apple managed to say it in a much less Dad ‘I’m just like you young people’ way, and in much more succinct and universally relatable wording. They didn’t go heavy on the word-count, and kept it short and sweet, and it delivered. 

NIKE - PURPOSE MOVES US

This manifesto was way too short, and way too much of an oversell of their ethics. Everyone knows that Nike has unethical practices, such as lack of sustainability and poor work conditions in the locations their goods are produced, so trying to act like none of that is happening is just too big of a pill to swallow, nobody will take it. Clearly, Nike meant it as a suppository, you can tell they’ve been shoving this bullshit up their own asses. 

TASK ONE - ADIDAS MANIFESTO; LOCATE AND DEBATE

Adidas’s manifesto was in an interesting and surprising format, which was a video. This was pretty engaging at first, but got old quick, and I found it way more enjoyable to read the little screencaps that the creator had posted UNDER the video on his website. The tone of voice for the manifesto in the video was pretty confident, but bordering on overly confident, dipping into the murky waters of being ‘cocky’. And it went on. And on. With the same idea, too. 

NOTES:

[thefavouritechild]

COPYWRITING ELECTIVE - DAY SIX

TAGLINES/CALL TO ACTION

TASK ONE: WRITE A TAGLINE/CALL TO ACTION FOR AMAZON PRIME PREMIER LEAGUE AD

Our first task was to develop a tagline or a call to action for the Amazon Prime ads that were developed in the previous session and for homework. 

TAGLINE/CALL TO ACTION IDEA SPAM:

CLASS SUGGESTIONS AND FEEDBACK:

Both of my taglines (’The Ultimate Season Pass’ and ‘Every Games a Home Game’) were chosen as two of the most effective lines from the taglines section. However, the line ‘The Ultimate Season Pass’ was one where I again fell into the Americanisation trap, and Brian suggested it would be much better, and much more British to be ‘ticket’ instead of ‘pass’, which really, I should have known, considering how much money my dad wastes on a West Ham season ticket just to watch them lose nearly every other week for an entire year, all whilst complaining when I spend money makeup that actually gives me some joy in life. 

When it came to a call to action, I actually didn’t write one down for the class, as I struggled with writing one. I feel like I didn’t properly understand it (and didn’t ask, like a damn fool), and only began to fully grasp it when the lecture continued on through the feedback of others calls to action.

LECTURE NOTES:

[thefavouritechild]

COPYWRITING ELECTIVE - DAY FIVE

WHOOPSIE I MISSED THIS - CATCH UP WORK

Due to being ill, I missed this work, and had to do it backwards after doing session six’s work, but it’s my blog and for the sake of continuity Day Five is going to come first, even though technically, for me, it came second.  The work set whilst I was away was to look at the relationship between copy and image, and how the two work in tandem to convey a message. The class were given an image of footballers celebrating a win, and told to come up with a headline for Amazon Prime’s new premier league access. After seeing everyone else’s work, it was actually really hard to try and come up with my own without being influenced by what I’d already seen, so I decided to progress onward with the next part of the work, and just reflect on other peoples work and listen to their feedback to inform my own future work in that department. The main points of feedback that people’s work received were:

Knowing the audience produces work that’s targeted - the people that spoke in the language of football fans demonstrated an understanding of who they were speaking to, and engaged with them on the same level. However, there is a fine line to tread here, and some people crossed it; you can go too far, and speak so much in the audience’s language that you isolate everyone else that doesn’t understand the references. Using phrases and terms commonly used by the audience is good, but sometimes playing on intricate inside jokes that require a lot of context can mean that you too closely limit your audience. The best headlines will speak to your audience, but be understood by all.

Most people included the word ‘Prime’ in their headline, and whilst puns can be golden, they’re not always appropriate, and can come across as tacky. You need to be sure you’re speaking to the audience and not just about the product, it’s a mix of both. 

The headlines that capitalised on the feelings of the image, and the feelings of seeing a game, were strong, as it created an emotive response in the audience and linked the image to the actual practice of watching a game. Likewise, headlines that talked about the game being ‘unmissable’, and exclusivity, were also strong as they make the audience feel apart of something and feel the fear of missing out without the product.