Featured Member: #couplecorner BENJ & MALYN GONZALES
We love how down-to-earth and genuine Benj and Malyn Gonzales are in sharing the joys and challenges of marriage! There’s so much to learn from their answers, and reminds us that truly God is the Beholder and Giver of love! (+++ also still super kilig)
Question: Can you tell us a little bit about your love story (main highlights)? Benj: We met each other in church around 2004-2005, but our relationship had largely been mutually platonic. We started noticing each other after being in the Tagalog service music team for a few years. We were not each other’s “types”, but we eventually saw positive traits in each other that went far beyond appearances and preferences. It came to a point where we inexplicably found ourselves in situations where we got to know each other deeper. After much prayer and having had a long conversation with her while being stranded in the rain, I decided to court her… but only after asking permission from her loved ones. It was 5 weeks into the courtship when she said yes to a relationship. After 3 months, I tricked her into climbing a mountain in Montalban. Unknown to her, all our companions were accomplices to the mountaintop proposal. Thankfully, she said yes. That was in February last year, and we got married last December 19. Things weren’t as smooth, and we almost broke up a few months before the wedding. What kept us together was assessing God’s purpose for marriage and trying to understand each other. We’ve been married for almost half a year, and so far we haven’t regretted our decision.
Q: What is an ideal day together (or what does 'perfect' day look like together)? Malyn: It's a celebration to wake up with him everyday. Every relationship will face its share of obstacles. There will be arguments, miscommunications, and also times when one will feel unloved. But still because of His Love and grace, every day is an ideal day together especially when we have quality sharing time. Benj: There are no perfect days, but we do have a personal relationship with a perfect God. I guess It’s when one of us is down or had a rough day, and the other exercises extra patience and initiative. That’s when you can really feel the companionship, and how God was right in saying “It’s not good for man to be alone.”
Q: What trait do you value most about each other? Malyn: What I value most is his honesty even in the smallest things. Honesty will pave the way to authenticity. It allows us to be ourselves, to be vulnerable, to admit our wrongs, to learn and grow, to love and be loved. I feel safe being open to him. I love how he takes the initiative in doing household chores and other helpful stuff like wholeheartedly picking me up from the office even when he's really tired, untiringly doing weekly grocery, patiently listening to my stories, being supportive in my counseling with some youth friends and sharing his own perspective as a man, and most importantly buying or cooking my untimely cravings. I respect and admire his dedication for work and humble commitment to minister to others. Benj: Her ability to understand and empathize with others. People easily open up to her because they don’t feel judged or rejected. That was also why I had the confidence to be brutally honest with her. She practices what she preaches and stands by her convictions, thus giving her the credibility when she counsels to others. She’s been through a lot in life but her hope in God remains unwavering. She is more mature than most people our age. It’s amazing how she handles difficult patients with such calmness. She also loves doing the chores I hate, like sweeping and mopping the floor. I guess that makes us complementary.
Q: If you were to give words of encouragement to each other,what would you want to say? Malyn: I praise and thank God for you. I pray that our commitment to God and to one another will grow stronger and more passionate everyday. May God's presence be always in our midst, guiding us in our journey as a couple & family in the future. May we humbly show and act CHRIST-like love, grace, mercy, and compassion to each other and to others :) As we walk in the spirit, may we bear the fruits of the Spirit which are love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness and self control. (Galatians 5:22-23). Let us continue to run the race with endurance because HE who promised is faithful now and forever. Benj: I thank God for your life. I want you to know that your life has influenced mine and the people around you in profound ways. May your love grow more and more in knowledge and depth of insight. May you continue to be a blessing to your family, friends, and patients. I want to assure you that everything you do for God will reap eternal rewards, even if we don’t seem to see any tangible results now.