#crazybitchiscrazy

[starshardsandnightshade]

My Favorite Past-time

Dear Yourself,

My favorite pastime is when I find out someone's not only been lying to me, but that they are a compulsive liar. I never say nothin' because I just like to see how far they'll go. It's insane the shit they make up.

Amiably,

Me

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Dear Me,

Please do me a favor - get a hobby. Like a real one. Not whatever this is.

Slightly perturbed,

Yourself

P.S. - I guess this explains all the self-loathing

[starshardsandnightshade]

Pudding Problems

Dear Me,

I think you have a pudding problem. We might need to cool it for a while. 

Love,

Yourself

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Dear Yourself,

You just want all the pudding for yourself, don't you....DON'T YOU?!?! It's my pudding!!!!! I know where you sleep...you just remember that.

Vigilantly,

Me