#cscu

[corntort]

cscu the musical | song: braces by friend

[pyyl0n]

they really put the toxic in toxic yuri <3 ART TRADE WITH THE WONDERFUL @corntort :o)))) of the car salesman au THE INCREDIBLE CAR SALESMAN !!! AU!!!!! :DDDD GRINS WIDELY. also who's gonna tell spark that thats the wrong way to hold a shotgun,

[meocities]

anyone else like cant stop cursing you... i got into it because the covers were sooo pretty and i forgot the plot and need to reread it but this is an open invitation for all cscu fans to be mutuals w me

[aubrey-plaza]

You know who she is. My friend, YouTube sensation, Claire Saffitz.

[felinetay]

no rules in breakable heaven 💔

[corntort]

what do you mean the spin off au now also has a spinoff au

[corntort]

ok tldr of the cscu spinoff, because i do wanna keep em separate.

spark n fark are still a rural couple that are known for shenanigans and still get in a lot of trouble often in their small town but now theres a supernatural twist to it.

fark is something of a weird, robotic vampire that starts to grow organic parts as he gets hungrier and hungrier, appearing somewhat demonic after some time and he Haaaaates feeding. its gross as fuck to him its GROSSS AND MESSSYYYY.

spark is a werewolf because of her connection to linework beast in all continuities 4 me.

i will now go crazy in explaining gow we even got here

okay so me n a friends reasoning for fark being vampiric and spark being a werewolf is we imagined a LOOONG time ago fark would really enjoy using reaper jester. its a brutal powerful outlet for a lot of his anger hes never really had a chance to fully express. abd what with its inherent fixation on others' energy/lifeforce/blood/whatever and specifically how to Drain it it gets easy for fark, someone curious about life, to latch onto reaper.

we both kinda nudged into the idea of people changing gradually qith the use of Any jester power, not only reaper, so thats where the demonic esque appearance came from, not really what looks like a traditional vampire.

however in this spinoff au of a spinoff au theres not really Powers. i think the need to feed is just something fark has had through whatever means, havent figured out how he got it yet.

spark is the werewolf for reasons i already explained its just the association i have with her! rumors about her spread that shes a lot stronger than she looks and all the kids in the town think shes a werewolf and she does nothing to contest it. if anything she feeds into it because 1. she doesnt care what people think 2. people arent gonna believe it anyway its just "the small rural town rumor" 3. it takes attention off fark, who is trying DESPERATELY to hide anything about his own situation from others.

this hiding, on top of him being disgusted by feeding, makes fark really hold out on eating for as long as possible and then loses control from that hunger. his form keeps gradually changing the hungrier he gets so spark and co Usually have a bit of a warning but he always tries to hide that too so he often loses it for a bit until he eats.

hes had many a scolding where sparks like i have to go out and kill wildlife and eat it raw weekly AND avoid authorities for hunting out of season AND deal with that huge mess afterwards, and you cant drink a little blood!?!?!? IDIOTTT

tldr this shits crazy idk how we got here

[corntort]

PLEASE elaborate on the cscu it seems absolutely fascinating

cscu (CAR SALSEMAN CINEMATIC UNIVERSE) is a silly spinoff au incredibly close to me and some friends' hearts. and dicks. mainly hearts.

we saw the one off drawing made by andy tunstall (this one) and went haha ^_^ thats fun! what if he was a ditzy stupid crazy jittery car salesman tho? (MISTAKE NUMBER ONE. IT ALL GOES DOWNHILL FROM HERE)

OKAY im gonna summarize and then get REALLLLY DETAILED so bear with me.

fark and spark live in a mobile home/RV park with ej and astra. ej usually goes to school during the day and astra goes out and does Anything Else most of the time so theyre barely home between school/activities/visiting family. spark is pretty much unemployed, only taking up odd jobs here n there for a little extra cash and spends the rest of the time screaming at the tv/napping/trying to fix her busted up cars in her yard/etc. fark works in the used car dealership obvs. spark spends most nights staking out in front of their mobile home for farks (MANY) enemies that try and get into fights with him. she guards the house with a definitely illegal sawed of shotgun.

spark and fark are a freak ass southern married couple.

the full rundown is fark is working at his used car shop in the DEEP rural south (as in, no other town for at least 60 miles) in a small town. he inherited it from his fsmily after they torn down lots of local loved business for something much "cleaner" and to capitalize on the money they could make of being a good pitstop for traveling formies. clarity and freom were notorious in the town for their disregard of local businesses, making more than enough enemies when they bulldoze/compete with gas stations/hotels/motels for their cleaner more modern buildings. clarity is a pretty busted up bot down here though, unable to get repaired due to her age and her parts growing obsolete, so when she finally shuts down shes shut down for Good, leaving the fortune they made to freom.

freom doesnt use a cent of it, it pretty much just rots in an account since her death kinda fucked him up bad. he lives on the outskirts and doesnt go out pretty much ever.

fark doesnt see much of the money either, separating himself from clarity and freom as Soon as he could. other than them buying the used car lot for him and getting him up and running, he didnt really associate with them, but it disnt matter since the town already didnt like him by association to clarity and freom. and it doesnt help that he oversells the quality of his used cars, giving people pretty shitty deals and making even More enemies out of it.

but the enemies that hate him most are ej (at first) and astra. ej and astra stayed with clarity after fark moved out. fark has a lot of survivors guilt, ej saw him as the brother that left and hes pretty angry about it for a really long time, astra has the same anger but 10x worse towards fark. she suffered the brunt of clarity and freoms manipulation and abuse after fark left and she really REALLY resents him for it. she and ej were forced to move in with him after clarity died and ej warms up to fark because of his youth but astra cant.

theres a LOT of tension between her and fark, but she really likes spark, so she doesnt stay gone for too long (the most is like a week and a half). shes a college drop out because of all the stress it gave her amidst all her family troubles qnd she struggles holding a job down but she gets a bit better with time.

ej is as hotheaded and impulsive as usual, finding ways to take out his aggression in school sports and constant practice. hes just very angry and gets in trouble a lot but he is a really good kid, fark tries his best to nudge him in the right direction, spark also has a lot of patience for both his and astra's tempers, cause she was the same as a kid.

caaaant think of anything else to add its late i shouldve been asleep hoyrs ago.

this is so separated from the canon source it might as well be an oc story between me and my close friends LOL. but i am sharing it with u all as well