Not gonna leave you
(WARNING: SELF HARM)
Niall's POV: "Y'know, if Y/N were here, she'd be proud of you. You're doing really well with trying to quit" I said to Zayn. We had two weeks left of touring and all of us were excited to get back home. "Thanks man" Zayn said rather quietly. "I really miss her." "Two weeks buddy. You can do it" I said cupping his wrist. He flinched a little at my contact. It was probably best for me to give him some space. He went into his bed in our shared hotel room to get some rest before dinner.
*Two hours later*
Zayn's POV: Niall was my best mate. We clicked right off the.bat. He knew how to joke with me and how not to joke with me. He knew me so well and when to give me space. The Irish lad walked up to the side of the bed and sat next to me. "Zayn, it's time for dinner." I grunted a bit before standing up. Everything was so groggy for me. After fixing up my mess of hair, Niall and I met up with the rest of the guys to head out for dinner. Louis picked the restaurant. It wasn't too fancy and not too casual. We got there and took our seats. Some fans came up to us and asked for a picture. We all posed for them and then they walked away. "I used to love Zayn. But now he's too serious. He doesn't stop for fans anymore. I wouldn't be surprised if Y/N leaves him" one of the girls said as they were walking away. Niall shot me an apologetic smile. Great. The fans hate me. My personality is shit and Y/N, the love of my life, is gonna leave me. "Hey, guys, I'm gonna head back to the hotel. Maybe get to bed early." They all understood and gave me a hug. "Ok, we'll bring you back some food."
I walked into the room. My heart raced as I walked over to my suitcase grabbing the small item and heading to the bathroom. I locked the door and set the item on the counter top, rolling my sleeves up. A gasp escaped my lips at the sight of what I've done to my flesh the precious night. The cuts were slightly scanned over, red, sensitive. I was loosing control. The cold razor was taken into my shakey hand. Slowly, I drug it across my left wrist. Blood seeped out. It was almost as if my arm decided to ignore the pain. I didn't even care that it hurt like a bitch. I deserved it. After both my wrists had, what I thought to be, a significant amount of blood dripping cuts, I moved on to my thighs.
Niall's POV: Taking the IPhone out of my pocket, I rung up Y/N. "Hey Niall!" She answered gleefully. "Hi...um, Y/N, I think you should fly out and see Zayn. H-he needs you." I'll get Paul to pay for your ticket. You can be here by tomorrow night." "Oh okay. I'll come but is everything alright?" "Ye-- no Y/N fans are saying things about him, and saying that you're gonna leave him. He hasn't smoked a whole lot either. He's trying to quit." The line went silent for a minute. "Okay, wow. Um, I'll pack. Just tell Paul I'll come. Thanks Niall. Bye." She hung up.
Y/N's POV: Forgetting about the popcorn I had in the microwave, I rung Zayn. It took him a while to answer but he finally did. "Y/N!! Hi Sweetie. Ugh, I haven't talked to you in forever!" "Well, it sounds like someone misses me" I chuckled into the phone. "Damn right I do." "Two weeks Baby. We can do it. I gotta get some sleep. And you should too." Okay...I love you Y/N." "Awe, I love you too Zayn. Get some sleep. Goodnight Baby." 'see you tomorrow' I whispered to myself as I hung up. I packed my bag and got into bed.
Zayn's POV: It felt so good to hear Y/N's voice. She said she loved me. Damn I loved her so much. I don't know what would happen if she leaves me. Not,wanting the boys to see, I cleaned myself up and hid the razor. I just wanted to crawl into bed. Niall walked in and got into his bed just as my eyes fluttered shut. I imagined that my arms were around Y/N right next to me in this bed, our legs entwined.
*The next morning*
We had a couple days off before our next show. It would give me some time to just calm down and relax. One less day until I get to see my girl!
Y/N's POV: Paul called me and got me all my ticket information. I was on a plane ready to see my boyfriend.
*Later that night at the hotel*
Niall, Harry, Louis, and Liam all met me in the hall. I walked behind them for a shield as they opened the door to Niall and Zayn's room. My lover hadn't seen me; he was sprawled out on the.couch watching a show. "We're gonna go out to the cinema and get some ice cream. Wanna join?" Harry asked. "Nah, I'm gonna stick around" Zayn replied not taking his eyes off the screen. Louis looked at me. "Okay, well we have a surprise for you" Lou said. Zayn looked at him in confusion before his gaze changed over to me. I dropped my luggage and ran to him, leaping into his arms. "ZAYN!" I exclaimed in content as he jumped up and spun me around. His lips were pressed into my neck. "Ahh I missed you so much Babygirl." "I missed you too Sweetheart." A stray tear of his dripped onto my shoulder. Zayn set me down and latched onto my hand. "Oh and I'm staying in Liam, Louis, and Harry's room tonight. You guys can have some space." Niall said. "Thanks mate."
Zayn's POV: Finally. Finally, Y/N was in my arms. With me. Close to me. Touching me. I loved her so much. It was almost 10:30 and I could tell she was dead tired. "C'mon Babygirl, let's go to sleep." She smiled, flashing her teeth, and nodded in agreement. Y/N stripped down to just a bra and her panties, knowing I loved it when she slept like that. I removed my pants and slept in my boxers and a long sleeve shirt, hoping to keep my cuts a secret. We got in bed and snuggled up under the covers. It felt so right; her body fit so well with mine. Almost like a puzzle piece. My hand was gripped on her hip, our legs intertwined. "I love you Zayn" Y/N pecked my chest before drifting off to sleep.
*An hour later*
Y/N's POV: I turned over on my back but I didn't like the position, so I laid back on my side reaching my right arm out to nuzzle into Zayn's warmth but the spot next to me was empty. I shot up out of bed to find Zayn. He had to be somewhere in the Suite. The bathroom door was mostly closed but slightly open. "Zayn? Are you okay?" "Wh-what?! Um yea, I'm fine." He didn't sound okay. I knew him too well. I pushed the door open and stood there stunned speechless. There stood Zayn, in just his boxers. He had fresh cuts on the sides of his calves and now he was working on his wrists. "Baby, I'm so sorry. I--I just-- The fans-- you--" "Zayn, Baby. Shh, it's okay." I removed the bloody razor from his hands and tossed it in the trash can. "C'mon. Come here Baby." He came closer to me, using my shoulder as support. I led him over to the sink to wash him up. I then washed his blood off my hands. None of us spoke. Zayn was the first to speak. "Are you mad?....Are--are you gonna leave me?" Without answering, I crashed my lips onto his.
Zayn's POV: Y/N didn't answer me. Instead, she crashed our lips together. I was hesitant at first but soon kissed her back. Wrapping my arms around her waist, we stumbled toward the bed. She stopped us before she fell. "What are you doing?" I asked her. Y/N started pulling her panties down and un clasping her bra, letting the articles of clothing fall to the floor. She then pulled my boxers down, releasing my length. "Lay on the bed Sweetheart" my girlfriend said calmly. I obeyed. Crawling on her knees, she took my length in her hands and pumped a few times before taking me in her mouth. Her head bobbed as she hollowed her cheeks out. I hardened in her mouth. Y/N was so good at this and my release was close. The beauty above me detached her lips from my erection and hovered over me. "Just relax.Baby." She positioned and sank herself onto my hard penis. A gasp escaped her precious lips once I was fully inside her. Her thrusts began. My penis almost fell out of her every time she pulled up. Grunts and moans flowed out of my mouth like a waterfall. I gripped onto Y/N’s hips providing some guidance. "Aahh. Z-Zayn." "Y/N" I managed to moan out as my girlfriend's movements sped up. "Oh, ah" her face was buried in my neck as mine was in hers. We both kissed each other’s neck. Y/N's walls clenched as her orgasm rippled through her.
"Baby, I-I'm close!" My penis twitched inside her wet heat. My cum poured into Y/N as she continued to ride me. Pleasuring me to no end. I could tell she was spent. Her body collapsed and she pulled off of me, laying on her side, facing me. She brought her right hand to my face and caressed my cheek. "I love you." "I love you too Zayn. Baby, I always will." Y/N pulled the covers back over us. I snuggled closer to her. She giggled and shifted so that I could lay my head on her chest, my arm secured around her. This was all I wanted. Her here with me. Everything was perfect and I didn't want it to end.
-Andrea