✘ (don't question anything)
His very name a prayer, a promise. A bulwark against every dark thing that writhed inside, that festered beneath James’ flesh and surged near every moment of every single fucking day-.
But Steve. Steve was a castle, a haven, a locked cellar that James could curl up inside and just hide-.
Steve. Beautiful wonderful loyal, so goddamn loyal, strong strident Steve. Sometimes it felt like just his name, just the thought of this man, could fill James up and spread into every dark corner. Even just his grasp, the firm dominion of his arms, James didn’t need anything more. Was sure he never would.
“You gotta let me go if you want dinner,” James finally murmured, breath hitched as he clutched back, trying so bad to play this off, to be normal, even as he tucked his face as far into Steve’s throat as he could, as if he could crawl beneath his flesh and never have to be parted from his warmth.
Should have struggled and fought.
Should have clawed and let blood with its dagger, should have cut this hostile’s very throat and let him drain on the floor. A message, a warning, against any others that could dare touch T8, that would assume the permission.
But that might have made its father distressed.
That…that was never desired. Never an objective to work towards.
T8 could do nothing but exist in this grasp then, even as apprehension flared the length of its spine. It could not even move, forced again to be within the Shield’s terrible dominion. Terrible and disallowed, no matter how…how warm the Shield was. How lacking in violence and suffocation.
It was not T8′s choice to be here, so maybe it could be…forgiven for going slack in the grasp. For letting fall its head against a broad shoulder. When it returned to the superiors, they would understand. This was not T8′s fault. Not its father’s fault. They wouldn’t be wroth.
They couldn’t be wroth, not when this was not T8′s fault.