#cygnastuck

[cygnahime]

You know what I sometimes miss about Homestuck fandom?

Character voices. Really fucking good character voices. Lots of people doing solid-to-amazing voice work. (By this I mean voices in writing, not people voicing things; there was that too, but I never got into it.)

Also, good weird genfic or background-pairings-only fic. My thirst for exploring weird AUs cannot be so easily slaked.

[cygnahime]

Okay, by unpopular request, Troll Final Fantasy XV. Under a cut because I love you and want you to be happy, or at least not forced to read my Certified Bad Opinions.

So, let’s start in the center and work our way out. The central story is clearly the tale of Prince Noctis And His Pale Harem. Like, it’s 100% a self-indulgent Harem AU of itself. Because, see, ever since Noctis was little he was basically Assigned Ignis and Gladio as his moirails, because obviously as the Crown Prince his physical and emotional stability is too important to be left to chance. [N.B. Noctis is clearly a tyrianblood, like, that’s not remotely up for debate. Unusually short-lived tyrianbloods? The Crystal drains their energy, making their lifespans unnaturally brief? IDK it’s Troll Fiction.] Ignis is there to take care of his physical wellbeing and support him emotionally, and Gladio is there to protect him and be honest with him.

BUT! One of the awkward things about growing up in an arranged moirallegiance with someone is that it isn’t always all that romantic. And Noctis is kind of a shit moirail to both of them, because he doesn’t know what the fuck he’s doing and also they’ve just. Always been there. So he doesn’t completely think of them as romantic relationships that he has to put work into. I mean, obviously he supports them financially and politically, but that just sort of happens without his active input.

Enter Prompto! This lowblood [Probably some kind of weird Niflheim-specific blood caste passing as a Lucian lowblood? Fortunately the game doesn’t show blood spatter, so it’s easy to conceal from the audience, but the fandom has to bend over backwards to explain how the other characters don’t notice.] comes into Noctis’s life after a lot of Brotherhood-era drama about being Good Enough to be frenemies with The Crown Prince, but the important point is that Noctis is suddenly seized with the urge to support and protect him and has no idea what to do. Meanwhile, Prompto swears he just wanted to be frenemies! Really! But he wants to be there emotionally for Noct, who seems so lonely!

Most of the previous paragraph is wild fan speculation, but like. That motel roof scene is the palesmut equivalent of sex in semi-public places. GET A PILE, YOU TWO! There are some people who redship it, but imo the writers intended it to be pale.

What really gets the fans into heated debate and/or wild flamewars is how the rest of the group’s relationships shake out. How do Ignis and Gladio feel about this serendipitous relationship pushing them aside? Is it a big pale orgy, or is there quadrant-swapping there? There’s a compelling argument to be made that Gladio and Noct fumble toward a black relationship, which fits their actual adult feelings much better than their arranged moirallegiance. There’s also an argument to be made that that shit goes rotten after Altissia, to the point where Ignis steps in to auspisticize. And then of course Noctis gets sucked into the Crystal and it all becomes kind of a moot point. :c

(The Troll Animaterrorists put in the time to animate some fucking hugs on their last night together, because despite being, you know, members of troll society, they’re not monsters.)

SPEAKING of arranged relationships, the forced/arranged matespritship between Noctis and Luna is still a thing, and the game is very coy about whether we’re supposed to think it’s serendipitous or not. I mean, they seem fond of each other, and they know each other’s vulnerabilities, but they haven’t met since they were children, so it’s hard to see if the concupiscent attraction is there. Fandom is divided: is it red? Is she pale for him too, because Noctis is just that much of a mess that everyone wants to comfort him? Are they platonic and both shipped red & pale with others? Fandom fight!

Speaking of Luna, I struggle to explain how trolls would depict her relationship with Ravus, because as we know trolls have no siblings. I mean, they’re clearly in a situation where they were raised together and are very attached to each other and are of the same bloodcaste [violet probably], but what does that...mean? I’m hesitant to say this, but troll culture might go for moirails. Like, really rubbish moirails, because Luna’s ability to control Ravus’s poor decisions and Ravus’s ability to protect Luna are both highly in question, but they’re trying. Extremely trying, in Ravus’s case. I’m not entirely comfortable putting siblings in a romantic relationship, but trolls don’t really have a concept of incest, so ??? Let’s not think about it too hard.

While I’m talking about things that make me uncomfortable, I’m not even going to try to explain Gladio’s and Iris’s relationship. They’re the same bloodcaste and were raised by their mutual ancestor and Gladio is supportive of Iris’s red crush on Noctis. Unless in troll AU it’s a black crush, which would at least be interesting. Let Teen Girls Have Innocent Black Crushes 2k17.

Circling back around, Prompto is the fandom pale bicycle. [I can tell because there’s an entire tag on AO3 devoted to his suffering. It’s science.] There’s definitely a small but enthusiastic Prompto♦Aranea fandom since Episode Prompto came out, though it’s hampered somewhat by the fact that Aranea is written as kind of flat in her self-sufficiency. There’s also definitely some Prompto/Noctis/Luna in some red/pale combination or other, which I personally am all about. I mean, I’m the pale orgy person, it is I.

I’m sad to say that Ardyn♠Noctis is definitely a thing, canonically speaking. That’s what complicated murder/suicides are all about, in troll terms. It’s also literally destined, so there’s really no getting away from it, even though it’s manifestly an unhealthy relationship that does no one any favors. That or it’s Noctis♣Ardyn/the Astrals and/or the world at large, which you could also make a solid argument for. I think I prefer that, because that’s not how blackrom works at all. I’m pretty sure Ardyn is gunning for Noct’s pitch quadrant regardless, though not as hard as Loqi is gunning for Cor’s. With an actual gun. It’s doomed to be unrequited, because you will take aroace Cor from my cold dead hands. So I guess in troll AU he’s aconciliatory/aconcupiscent. (I say this just to demonstrate how little of the quadrant-specific vocabulary I have forgotten.)

Kingsglaive is a hard movie to pin down, quadrant-wise. Like, I definitely feel like there’s some kind of spark between Nyx and Luna, but it’s hard to pin down to one side of the red/black divide. There’s probably fic for both tbh. I guess canon keeps it ambiguous as well. I mean, they clearly respect each other, but also there’s a lot of sharing deep-seated insecurities. Personally, I’m all for healthy blackrom, as you know. Lunafreya could use a chance to clash with someone for fun.

Libertus is much more popular in the troll fandom than the human fandom. (Am I salty about the lack of fan content for my fave? Why would you say that?) He’s so soft and in such emotional distress! Your pale self-insert goes here! [Obviously all the Glaives are rust- or brown-bloods. The magic probably is replaced by unlocking latent psychic abilities. Or else they keep magic and this is a ~strange world~ where there are ~no psionics~.] Nyx and Libertus and probably Crowe are like...how Vriska and Terezi used to call each other ‘sisters’? Long-term stable nonquadrant cahootship? That’s them. I realize I had one use of ‘siblings’ in this post and I used in on characters who aren’t actually siblings, but nyeh. Maybe Gladio and Iris are also Troll Siblings. Cahootfriends. It’s not my fault Luna and Ravus kind of suck at being in cahoots.

And that I think covers most of the cast! This is only twelve million words long! I have so many thoughts, apparently! If you also have thoughts, please come share them! You are also a giant nerd and we should be friends!

[cygnahime]

So the thing about homestuck, the thing I will cling to and hold to my heart about this ridiculous, wonderful, horrorterrible canon, is: I'm watching someone live blog homestuck, and she said, "it's Dirk or Dave - which is the queer one again?" And the answer, of course, is both. Both! And they're not all there is, either. The queer characters are everywhere. And they're alive (some of them) (as homestuck allows). And some of them are happy. And some of them are in love. And all of them are people. And that's great.

[cygnahime]

Sometimes my brain does crossovers and then I end up all TEREZI DO NOT LICK THE FADE SPIRIT THEY DON’T LIKE THAT and she’s all BUT H3 T4ST3S OF D3L1C1OUS JUST1C3 and Justice for his part just isn’t sure what to make of any of this except he’s not sure why mortals invented tongues.

[cygnahime]

Well that update didn’t make me feel sick or anything at all.

I think that puts to rest all hope that Vriska has become a better person in any way.

[cygnahime]

GIRLS GIRLS GIRLS GIRLS GIRLS

shrieking

so much shrieking

[cygnahime]

Finally say the upd8. Really...intense. Good tho. Powerful.

[cygnahime]

*lies on back, kicking feet frantically* I WAS A COUPLE UPDATES BEHIND AND NOW I AM SO HAPPY