Barrowman isn’t a gambling man. Infact, he’s rather proud of his ability to NOT gamble in the face of life and death. He is a man of a hero, a child, raised on stories and dreams. His father, Sergio, doesn’t speak much about his past, other than the friends, and his love. Perhaps it’s for the best, because Barrowman might be a different kind of evil if he was aware of what love can do.
Which, might be why, when faced with the Black Spider and a moment of peace from her evil, he takes it.
He isn’t soft in the head, he knows what the amulet means. She means to coax them into a safe place of mind, or something equally sinister. Does he mind? No. The amulet is a blessing, if only because it means no one can track them with spells. Does it offer comfort?
No.
Infact, this amulet, the longer it stays against his skin, feels like a weight. It will choke him, and he knows this.
But perhaps she can be useful, and if her being useful means his life, then it is for the best. To provide saftey for his friends, a sense of comfort, peace in this time of the world ending, it is idylistic. And he loves it. Loves that he can give them this.
Upon entering the Yartar, he knows maybe two things. One, the amulet feels heavy, and two, Kai will never trust him if he takes this step.
But he does. Of course he does. It’s easy to do, asks someone for information and there she is, in his room in the night. He’d assumed as much, really-- that she was here, and she’d hear whisperings of a man seeking her like a cure. Perhaps he doesn’t think her evil, or the gravity of her being doesn’t settle into his mind as it should, but when he is stirred to her sitting in his room, he does not send her away.
“Do you not think it a tad strange to be in a man’s room in the middle of the night?”
The hood is lowered, and she smiles at him. The smile tells him much, like how much this decision will haunt him and how she knows he has no interest in her, like she knows where his eyes rest when love is mentioned.
She does not move beyond leaning forward, hands still flicking through his notes absently, absorbed in the ramblings of a wizard with too much time on his hands.
“Not particularly. Do you not think it a tad strange to be asking after a woman you do not like?”
Barrowman squints, rubbing the sleep from his eyes and, after a pause, sighs.
“Why did you give us the amulet?”
“Peace treaty. Like the letter said. I wish to make amends.”
“We took your business prospect, and you follow us, and now tell me you meant no harm?”
“I did not. I asked them to follow you only-- they misstepped. I want you to keep the amulet to remember that I am deeply sorry for the trouble.”
Again, he watches her. Nothing is out of place, perfectly poised and waiting for him to speak again. A stalemate, a moment where she knows that he has nothing on her, and he is left to resign to the fact that, yes, he is about to make a bad decision.
At least it will save some time, and effort.
“I need something.” Is mumbled, low in his throat; he does not wish to admit to himself that he needs-- no, wants her help. He wants it, because the thought of one of the others maybe dying because they asked the wrong thing in the wrong town. But he is...happier to be serviceable to them, somehow.
“Really now?” The reply is coy, and he has a feeling she knows what he needs, but she enjoys pulling it from him like teeth.
“I’m sure you’ve noticed the giants wandering--”
“Yes, dreadful stuff, isn’t it?” Despite her interruption, he continues eyes rolling slightly at her non-chalant reply.
“Yes, they’re around. There’s a sword I need, and...the Knight Captain here has it.”
A moment passes, silence resounding between them, where he looks at her and she is...watching him. Assessing him, perhaps.
“I’d be willing to pay...or if you’d preffer I can return this favor for one from me.”
This catches her interest, a spark in her gaze where she sits up all to suddenly.
And then she’s standing, heading to the door.
“I’ll take the favor, wizard.”
As she leaves, the dread sets in, but he sleeps regardless.
He wakes to noise, to the sound of Growl and Andre talking loudly and Kai quietly reprimanding them, and the the sound of Snear whispering in a soft voice to herself. He’s woken to Kai, knocking and telling him somethings happened. They’re investigating, because of course they are, and what greets Barrowman in the streets creates a void within him, and all his anxiety seems to rush back in full force.
There, is a body. It hangs from it’s feet, and it is skinned. Blood drips from it, and a crowd surrounds the sight, all gasps and gossiping. The guards attempt to keep all at bay, and for the life of him Barrowman wants to pretend he can’t see this.
He hopes his assumption is wrong, but he will bite the bait.
One guard stops him, and after a brief moment of charm he learns the identity of the dead man.
Apparently, the Knight Captain had been killed in the night.
Suddenly Barrowman feels sick.
So he leaves, quickly. He knows the others follow, though he makes sure to be 20 strides ahead and be in his room and shut the door before anyone can ask.
On his bed, now neatly made, is a package.
It is oddly sword sized, and tied with a black ribbon. The black ribbon makes him feel worse and, quickly, he takes it and stuffs it away. The next thing he does is out of pure panic, but it is because Kai is somewhat of a leaning stone. If anyone knows not to spread what Barrowman has done, it is Kai.
Or not.
But he trusts him, to an extent he shouldn’t. It’s not a shared sentiment, he knows, but he finds him regardless and begs him to come talk in his room. Once in there he is fidgeting up a storm, and Kai, ever perceptive, seems to realize something is wrong.
“...what’s wrong? You wouldn’t ask me up here if this wasn’t serious.”
Barrowman doesn’t reply, instead turns and pulls the packed up blade from where he’d hid it. Offers it, face pale and drawn.
“I...I asked a favor of Tyril. And she delivered. I pr...I promised her I’d do something in return for this...”
Silently, Barrowman watches as Kai unpacks the blade. A quick glance tells him everything he needs to know, that the blade Kai now has, is the blade they were after. For a moment the swordsman does nothing, stares, then directs his eyes to the wizard before him.
The silence echoes his dissapointment, and Barrowman starts to say something-- Kai is repacking the blade, he’s leaving, and Barrowman wants to say anything, something, forgive me I’m so sorry I didn’t mean this--
The door opens and Growl is there, wide eyed and smiling. It’s enough to settle the guilt in deep, so deep he shuts his door and hides. Hears Kai say something to her, but is too lost in his guilt to care for it.
CHEEK TO CHEEK IN HELL WITH A DEAD GIRL WALKING.
“death comes for those unworthy.”
HEATHERS MUSICAL OST // LIFEBOAT
SNOW PATROL // WHAT IF THE STORM ENDS
PLUMB // IN MY ARMS
ERIC HOJDEN // LITTLE BY LITTE
MARIA MENA // IT TOOK ME BY SURPRISE
PANIC AT THE DISCO // DON’T THREATEN ME WITH A GOOD TIME.
THE SCORE // UNSTOPPABLE
COLDPLAY FT. RIHANNA // THE PRINCESS OF CHINA
1 is for letters!! he writes all his letters to his dads in draconic. it’s for his own shit reasons tbh
another is for field notes; like when he’s doing ~*magic*~ bullshittery he writes it all down in that.
3rd is for other field notes. it’s basically a diary but observations, notes. anything really.
he has many and others are specific like his spell tome or the book he writes all the stuff he finds out about magic items in.
here’s a fun barrowman headcanon i’M SURE WE CAN ALL LOVE
after he gets the stupid infernal of kai’s name on his arm and growl decides to get vore’d, he sits down once they reach a town again and goes
“fuck it.”
and thus he gets tattoo’s of all his friends names in various languages.
Snaer’s in dwarvish
growl’s in common
andre’s in giant and daveth in elvish
they’re all on the one arm and circle it like a bracer? and he just
uses it as a reminder i guess
so he can look at it and go “i trust these people with my life.”
