#daddydesku

[cosmicsnowcryptid]

*whispers* Daddy desku

Not today, Satan.

[rabidrabbitsrabato]

@theowlandthefinch here’s the fic I promised you!

(For you guys that are confused, Hailey loves Dark’s desk in a more than platonic way, so she’s getting fics and drawings because we all want to spread her love.)

The Desk (also posted on a3o)

Walking down the long hallway, Hailey came to a closed wooden door. Shifting the box in her hands to one arm, she knocked on the door and called out softly, “Mr. Dark sir? I have your package.” Hailey slowly opened the door and peeked around the corner when she heard no answer.

The room was empty.

Her boss was known for having a short and vicious temper so perhaps it would be best to just leave his package inside the doorway. Hailey opened the door farther and stepped inside. Setting the box down Hailey turned to leave but frozen when a shining wood surface caught her eye.

Could it be…?

Yes, yes it was! A mahogany desk! Hailey loved desks, more than any other earthly object. And this was her chance to get a closer look at one rarely seen.

Not fully aware of her actions Hailey pressed the door shut and crossed the room with bated breathe.

Standing a foot away from it, she stared wide eyed. There were no imperfections, not a scratch or a ding. It was empty of any paperwork or stationary. It could probably rival Dark in intimidation.

Speaking of her boss, he would have no idea if she touched it, right?

Hailey glanced around the empty room, as if he could be hiding and watching her somewhere.

Deciding she was just being paranoid, Hailey turned back to her interest and placed a hand flat on the surface. As she did so her eyes fluttered shut and a shudder ran through her body.

It was better than she had ever dreamed. So smooth and slightly warm to the touch.

When a tingling sensation traveled up from the desk, Hailey couldn’t hold back a breathless moan. “O-Oh!”

After a few seconds Hailey opened blurry eyes to find herself kneeling on the ground, upper torso draped on the desk.

“Do you even know what you do to me, Daddy Darky’s Desk?”

“…” The desk responded.

Hailey laughed and laid her head down on her arm to murmur, “Of course you would say that. But you know how much I want you.”

The desk spoke low, uncertain. “…”

“That doesn’t matter! I want to keep my planners in you, to write on your top, to spend every moment with you in my room.” Hailey rubbed her hand across the furnish, petting it. “I want your wood.”

The desk was silent.

Hailey sighed, standing up and straightening her clothes. “I get it. But I will come back,” she said as she walked to the door.

“…”

Hailey turned back with a smile. “Forever, my love. Forever.” And then she walked out the same way she came, scheming how she could get her new precious desk through the door.

[cosmicsnowcryptid]

I got an alert on my phone while working and I just want you all to know that I was gifted a copy of Dream Daddy by Daddy Desku.

[cosmicsnowcryptid]

I imagine death so much it feels more like a memory

[cosmicsnowcryptid]

You know who else loves a desk? Hamilton. He wrote so many things on there that just thinking about it makes me blush.

Hamilton would be MUCH more likely to fall in love with a desk than I would, tbh. 

Homeboy had a really big void in his heart. After losing his parents so close together (one to disease, one just abandoned him), then losing his surrogate parental figure to suicide, and THEN losing more loved ones and some of the few possessions he had to a natural disaster, he ended up sailing to America. Alone. He had no one.

With this context, the relationships in his life make much more sense. It’s easy to view him as nothing but another horny guy who cheated on his wife, and while I will never defend or condone his actions (”Eliza Schuyler Hamilton deserved better!” I scream into the void), there was a lot more to it.

A lot of people will say that Alexander didn’t love his wife, but I don’t believe that for a second. I think Alexander desperately wanted to form intimate connections with other people, and I don’t mean sexually, for the most part. I believe he loved Eliza truly and deeply. I also believe he loved Angelica Schuyler, and John Laurens, in a similar but different way. I believe he felt more for Maria Reynolds than just lust. I believe he loved his children as much as a father can. And I believe the man adored and loved his friends and mentors. He held Washington in high regard professionally, but also personally as a father figure.

He also hated many people, and was very outspoken about that as well. But what it really comes down to is that he felt things passionately and deeply, and he wanted people to feel them WITH and to feel them ABOUT.

...I think I digress a bit here. Uh, TL;DR I think Hamilton would be totally into a sentient desk.

[cosmicsnowcryptid]

I was warned but I was not prepared - 😐

Never go into the Daddy Desku tag without your wilderness gear and a 72 hour kit, friend. It’s dangerous out there.

[cosmicsnowcryptid]

Okay I regret one thing. If only I had counted syllables by the slam of drawers instead of using an online counter. Daddy Desku could have prevented all this.

Daddy Desku wanted to see you humiliated. 

He doesn’t care if you’re on his side or not. He has no mercy.

[cosmicsnowcryptid]

w-what is daddy desku??

A sin.