Jan 1, 2022
303/365 Those early morning blues #fallphotochallenge #daysixty https://www.instagram.com/autumnrose530/p/CYK7YYyNJTc/?utm_medium=tumblr
seen from United States
seen from Mexico
seen from Sweden
seen from China
seen from China
seen from South Korea
seen from Sweden
seen from South Africa
seen from United States
seen from China
seen from United States
seen from Germany
seen from Belgium
seen from United States
seen from China
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seen from Hong Kong SAR China
seen from United States
seen from Germany
seen from Sweden
303/365 Those early morning blues #fallphotochallenge #daysixty https://www.instagram.com/autumnrose530/p/CYK7YYyNJTc/?utm_medium=tumblr
213/365 Found this podcast. Quick listening. Interesting story too. #summerphotochallenge #daysixty https://www.instagram.com/p/CW7Qg8NtghV/?utm_medium=tumblr
29/365 The sky peeking out from behind the clouds is so pretty to me. #winterphotochallenge #daysixty https://www.instagram.com/p/CLSmm-PlHMW/?igshid=1i5ccnxz3ac5
299/365 If Zoe can fit, She will sit. #fallphotochallenge #daysixty https://www.instagram.com/p/CHJ9TLuFTuq/?igshid=gdagimoouji
241/365 This is my favorite view. The road has traffic off and on, the street sign, street light and power line remind me of home. It's a small comfort. #summerphotochallenge #daysixty https://www.instagram.com/p/CEmmB-GFFhr/?igshid=1gi8zdo7grnc3
The Break Up Blog - Day Sixty
Sixty days.
That's nearly two months since X and I broke up.
I guess it's also true that time flies when life is shit on rollerskates.
Then again, these weeks dragged by too slowly for me.
I managed to start some of my speaking assessments today and grade them after work, which was good. But I'm not looking to wrapping up on Monday, it's going to be exhausting. And I still need to help two of my autistic students in fourth grade with writing their speeches, which will be difficult. I'm gradually running out of patience and energy.
N is starting to look for new candidates for both mine and C's teaching posts for next year and H asked me again today if I'm really going to leave. I felt bummed out after that, like maybe I'm making the wrong choice by leaving. But at the same time, the school's going to make lots of new policies which aren't going to benefit and end up giving me more work than I want or need. So maybe it's better to get out now before the shit hits the fan in a big way next year.
As much as I need to get rid of X's things from my apartment, I'm not actually looking forward to going to FedEx tomorrow morning. I especially feel sad about sending Christie, the teddybear X gave me, away. I spent so much time hugging that bear at night and sewing up bits of her where the stuffing kept coming out. But I don't have the heart to throw her away like she meant nothing to me. So I'm giving her back to X along with Rico, my penguin plushie. I can't cuddle with Rico again after X cuddled with him non-stop in Manila.
I'm throwing away that piece of crap travel pillow that I got at the Dessert Museum in Manila though. It was expensive and too uncomfortable to be called a pillow. I also bought it for X after she nagged me to get it. And then I ended up buying a second travel pillow at Miniso anyway that was better.
Why did I do any of this stupid shit again? Oh that's right, it was for love, or something a lot less practical.
Here's hoping it doesn't cost me an arm and a leg to send X's things back. It'll be catharctic and just a bit sadistic to have X pay for receiving her own posessions, lol.
Tomorrow's going to suck hard.
I grabbed C's punching bag and gloves from her apartment earlier. So after I'm done at FedEx, I'll swing by work to get a pump and then go home and inflate the punching bag. And if I get too sad about X, I'll turn that sadness into anger and pound it out of my system, one punch at a time.
I hope all of these crappy things are leading towards something good. I think I need to talk to my therapist and get some professional tips for dealing with my stress and depression. I can't keep drowning my feelings in liquor, even though last night's peach wine was delicious and got me tipsy pretty quickly.
Talking to CH this week definitely helped to relieve my stress and cheer me up. Even telling CI that X and I broke up today helped too.
Maybe I'm slowly chipping away at all the sadness that's been eating away at me for months now.
Whatever happens tomorrow will probably hurt a lot. But I also know that I'm strong enough to get through it.
211/365 I love historical places and things. I want to take pictures of all the historical markers I come across. #summerphotochallenge #daysixty #daythirty #somethingiwantyoutoknowaboutme https://www.instagram.com/p/B0mt_DAlXXb/?igshid=yj5n24jum6m
