Dealing with Offspring in Invalid Marriages
Full Question
I am taking my grown children and their spouses on vacation. Some are not married to those with whom they want to share a room. Should I allow this?
Answer
If I understand you correctly, your children are in legal marriages, but some of those marriages are not recognized to be valid by the Church. You may also mean some of your children are not married but will be bringing a partner of the opposite sex. Generally speaking, the Church requires that we must recognize an essential difference between valid and invalid marriages (CCC 2353). Valid marriages are a social good and a gift from God. Invalid marriages constitute grave matter and the possibility of public scandal. Moreover, the Church requires that the faithful should avoid direct cooperation in the sins of others (CCC 1868).
In matters where a legal marriage is not recognized by the Church to be valid, the Church does not give specifics of how to avoid direct cooperation in the sins of the partners. In any case, the Church trusts the faithful to use their best prudential judgment in handling the issues that arise within extended families in a way that upholds the Church's teaching on the sanctity of a valid marriage. In this particular circumstance, one solution might be to pay for your children's other travel expenses but not their hotel expenses. If you need assistance in how to implement this with your family or to find other acceptable solutions, make an appointment with your pastor, confessor, or spiritual director.