#delusionally optimistic

[lovinglittlelibraoriginals]

today is gonna be a good day.

(i did oversleep and miss my window to workout this morning, but that’s okay, there’s always tomorrow)

[lovinglittlelibraoriginals]

every major part of my life right now is in the "well, just wait and see” phase.

• my career

• my love life

• my living situation

all of them. unstable. unclear about what they will be in the future. ideas. directions. but nothing for sure. nothing i can count on. nothing i can rely on.

...and i wish i could see that in a more positive light. i wish i could feel it when i think "well that means everything has potential... and the things that i think i want, i could end up with even better! not knowing means that there's so much beautiful and exciting and wonderful things in store for me. i just don't know what they are yet." because that is true. those are my original thoughts. that's real and that's true.

...but what i actually feel is the crushing weight of not knowing and not having safety and security.

i’m really trying to transition back into the mindset of being delusionally optimistic. i really am.

[channel-lime]

I’m just slowly re reading ufc fic and man I’m enjoying it even more, so excited for the last chapter

thank you for saying it!!! i’m sorry it’s taking so long, but i WILL have it posted by the end of september, that is a promise from me to you