You're upset that you let it happen. Even more upset, though, that you let it happen in your own bed. Heaven is no place for a demon, but one straddles your lap now, devilishly large cock bumping your lips.
"Come on," Remus sneers, taking hold of your halo to yank you forwards, and not minding when it burns his hand. The demon doesn't feel pain, and the scorch mark against his palm tingles your cheek as he drops it there, prodding at your jaw.
"Open up," He urges, "You signed a contract, angel."
Not on purpose, you want to shout. But you keep your mouth firmly shut. It was a trick, really. A blowjob to keep your charge out of trouble. But Remus had revealed the trouble ailing them to be quite fake after you'd signed, and now you're here, his cock in your face.
"Breaking a promise," He laughs with his chest, tattoos lining his arms that you stare at as they hold you in place, "What would your higher ups think of that, huh? Do you think they'd demote you? Do you think they'd send you to hell?"
"Shut up," You snap, but it's just enough for Remus to pry open your jaw. He wedges his thumb inside, wrenching your lips apart and holding your mouth open. He's more than happy to let go once his cock is inside, and a sharp thrust of his hips has it hitting the back of your throat hard enough to elicit a gag from you. He smirks, the same devilish laugh shaking his chest.
"That's right, angel." He sneers, hellfire in his eyes, "You don't worship them, do you? You worship me."
Summary: Written for Intrulogical Week 2022 @intrulogicalweek
Logan is stuck in Limbo until the Afterlife Registration Bureau processes his case so he can properly move onto a afterlife, whether that is heaven, hell, reincarnation or something else. While wandering around aimlessly, he’s approached by a demon that introduces himself as Remus and offers him a quicker way to the next life.
Content Warnings: Food, Discussion of Past Lives
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“Salutations Remus.”
“There you are! I almost thought you changed your mind!” Remus grinned at Logan. Today the demon was dressed in what Logan would consider a more reasonable outfit than the day before with black, ripped pants that covered his entire legs, though paired with the same boots and a shirt that had more colors than Logan had seen since he got to Limbo.
“I apologize, I did not remember the path as well as I thought I did,” he explained, straightening his tie. As a pair the two must look very odd since Logan’s shirt was neatly tucked into his pants and without a wrinkle on it. Add to that his dress shoes and slacks, the two couldn’t have more different styles.
Remus took a look around. “Yeah, this place doesn’t really have anything that makes it stand out, huh? You know what, I’ll take you back to your apartment later, then I can pick you up there next time.”
“That is satisfactory.”
“Great! Let’s get to todays challenge! I need you to take my hand.” Logan raised a brow but didn’t argue. “Better press those teeth together, you don’t wanna bite your tongue!” Remus warned as the other takes his hand and before Logan can ask what he means by that, he’s pulled through a portal of some kind. Thankfully he heeded Remus’ warning because as the land on the other side, the impact would have for sure clacked his teeth together rather forcefully.
“Welcome to Sector P!” Remus announced and Logan takes a moment to look around. They stood on a street, similar to the ones in his own sector, but instead of apartment buildings – though he could see lots of them, too, just a bit further away – it was lined with restaurants. Any food imaginable was advertised with blinking signage, not as brilliant as on earth, they were still in Limbo after all, but it was much livelier than in the sector Logan was used to.
“I was under the impression that all sectors were the same,” he said after clearing his throat.
“Yeah, most would. They don’t really tell you that they group you based on like one defining characteristic.” Remus starts wandering down the road, eyeing the different signs. Logan follows, brows pinched.
“What characteristics?”
“Well, this is the sector for the foodies. There’s one for gamblers, nature lovers, children, animal people and so on. The ARB picks one out that seems to fit the best and sends you there.”
“I understand, I think. But what is my sector about then? It’s a lot emptier.”
“I think Sector G is mostly for loners and intellectuals. You had a library at one point but that apparently led to some fights about books and heated debates.” Remus used air quotes as he said ‘heated’. “It caused more trouble than it was worth, so they just put some random, fancy books in your rooms and hoped that would keep you entertained for long enough.”
Indeed, there had been some books in Logan’s apartment, and despite them not catering to his specific tastes, he had read them since there was nothing else to do, but he finished them a while ago and had no desire to revisit them. He hadn’t even considered the possibility that his neighbors could have different ones he could borrow.
“Here we are!” Remus called, pulling Logan out of his thoughts. They stood in front of a restaurant that advertised their all-you-can-eat buffet. With a grin, Remus led Logan inside. Immediately they were assaulted with an almost overwhelming mix of different smells. They all came from the buffet that had a bigger selection than Logan had ever seen.
“This seems… excessive,” he commented, making Remus giggle.
“You are the kind of person that would say that. You’re challenge for today is to try everything here.”
“Everything?” Logan asked, eyes wide. “There is no way I can eat that much.”
“Sure you can, if you put your mind to it!”
“What about allergies?” Logan didn’t have any, but he was willing to fake one. Remus bellowed out a laugh.
“You’re dead! You can’t have allergies!”
“What do you mean?”
“You don’t have a flesh prison anymore that could react badly to anything here. You don’t need to breathe anymore either. You’re a soul, you don’t need sustenance. I could stab you and nothing would happen.”
Logan furrowed his brows in thought. “But I still feel pain. I even cut myself before.”
“That’s because you’re used to having a flesh prison. You expect to feel pain, so you feel pain.”
“You mean it’s like a pavlovian response?”
“Yeah, essentially. It’s a habit your soul isn’t aware of.”
“I see. But then what is the point of the restaurant if no one here needs to eat?”
“Questions like that are exactly why you don’t have any in your sector. Some people enjoy the taste of food, even if it doesn’t get them anything else. Now, no more questions, you don’t have forever.” Remus pulled Logan over to a table where he plops down in a seat. “Go on, get a selection. I’ll wait here.”
“If you insist,” Logan sighs and gets to work. Deciding to start at the salad bar, he filled a bowl with all different types of leaves, toppings, and sauces, before returning to Remus.
“Starting light, are we?” he asked with his typical grin. Logan simply nodded.
“I did not experiment much with food during my lifetime, so I thought I would start with what is familiar.”
“Smart but boring.”
“I am not in the intellectual sector for nothing,” Logan commented dryly, earning another laugh from Remus.
“Tell me why else you’re there,” he asked, propping up his chin on his hands and studying Logan intently as he takes the first bite of his salad.
“I was a professor in life. I have a doctorate in astronomy.”
“Uhh, I love space!” Remus exclaims, wiggling in his seat. “It’s a shame I rarely get to see it. Tell me more.”
So, during the time it took Logan to eat his salad, they discussed space and Logan’s research. In the time it took Logan to fill his plate a second time, this time with an array of appetizers, Remus decided he wanted to change topics.
“What about family, Nerdy Wolverine? Ever got married?” he asked before Logan had even sat back down.
“No. I had a few relationships during my twenties and at the beginning of my thirties, but they didn’t last that long. I never missed it, however.”
“Yeah, that checks out, I guess.”
“What about you?” Logan shot back, a bit offended by Remus dismissive comment.
“I never got married when I was alive, but I’ve got-“
“Wait a minute,” Logan interrupts. “You were alive once? A human, I mean?”
“Yeah. Was ages ago, but yeah.”
“How did you become” – Logan gestures to his horns and wings – “a demon then? I thought you were created like that.”
“There are some demons and angels like that, mostly the oldest ones, but I think most of us are converted from human souls after being alive.”
“Did you choose to become a demon then?”
“Yeah! I was in heaven for a while, but it was like super boring and then I met Janny and he showed me how fun things can be, so I decided to become a demon and stick with him. We’ve been together ever since.”
“Fascinating. What about your family then? If you had one, I mean.”
“I wasn’t really close to anyone but my brother. We were soldiers, born and bred, pretty much, so we didn’t get a lot of parental love if you know what I mean. But me and Ro got along for the most part. Ended up becoming war heroes and died on a battlefield. Got us both into heaven and while I went down to hell, Ro stayed up there and became an angel. We still hang out from time to time.”
“That’s allowed? Aren’t heaven and hell enemies?”
“They used to be but not anymore really since there are way too many souls nowadays. It’s why this whole Limbo system exists; they would be overrun otherwise.”
They continued like that for hours. Remus would ask Logan about his life on earth and Logan would inquire about the afterlife while slowly making his way through the assortment of dishes. Neither of them really paid attention to that though, too enthralled by their discussion.
Eventually Logan arrived at the table with one last plate.
“This should be all that I’m missing. I don’t feel like I ate all that much.”
“Like I said when we came here, you don’t have a flesh prison anymore, you don’t have a stomach you can fill.”
“And I suppose since I was so focused on our discussion, I didn’t even register how much I ate which is why it didn’t trigger the pavlovian response.”
“Sounds legit to me,” Remus shrugged and watched as Logan finished the last of the dishes. “Congrats, Wristwatch, you passed challenge one!”
“Thank you, Remus. I must say this was more delightful than I thought. You are a good conversationalist.”
“Aw, thanks, Lo Lo! I had fun, too. But it’s time to go back. Gimme your hand.”
Logan blinked. “Don’t we have to pay?”
Remus burst out laughing. “Pay with what? We don’t have money here. And have you seen even one employee around here?”
“I haven’t but… Where does the food come from then?”
“Don’t question everything, dork. Now let’s go.”
Logan wanted to protest more but he stopped himself. He had taken up a lot of Remus’ time already and they would meet again soon, so he could postpone his curiosity for now.
“Very well then.” He takes Remus hand and is pulled through another portal.
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“So, how was your day with the stuck-up?” Janus asked later that day when Remus once again deposited himself on his lap.
“Fun! Got a lot of info about him. He was a professor for astronomy! He told me lots of space facts!”
“Sounds wonderful, dear.”
“Yeah, and tomorrow I’m gonna take him to Sector W.”
“Isn’t that the sector full of… Are you sure that is a good idea, Muse?”
“It’s gonna be fun, don’t worry!”
“I doubt he will find it funny.”
“I’m gonna make it up to him after. But first I really want to rile him up. He’s hot when he’s passionate.”
Janus sighed. He had a feeling that he would need to step in before the seven challenges were done.
Demon!reader finds Padfoot and decides to bring him home unaware that Demon!Remus knew him in school. She walks in and says all over-excited "baby meet fluffy!" Rumus just drops to the floor laughing and yelling "FLUFFY! SHE NAMED YOU FLUFFY!" all of a sudden he becomes Sirius and she's so unsure how to act she just turns into her animangus cat and hisses then walks away! Can't you just see Sirius jumping away and hiding behind Remus when she hisses!
Stop it remus would never let them live it down 😭😭
so i came up with a new au (hooray!!) and all i know about it is:
everyone except virgil is a demon in disguise
i guess they’re kinda part of a demon mob?? yeah okay
they have a club as their front
roman, remus, and patton are performers (deceit too if needed)
meanwhile deceit is the advertisers/deal making guy?? i guess?? idk i just know he has a fancy desk
logan is sort of the mastermind behind it all
logan, deceit, and remus are very very very gay for patton (and maybe each other too ;))
virgil is a detective who is done with people’s shit 90% of the time
he is also very gay for roman after he sees him preform one night
patton often wears this plastic halo thing just to be a lil shit and make fun of angels (he’s kinda passive agressing about it) (look he’s still really nice but he’s still a demon and demons are like that tm)
there’s a rivalry between angels and demons kinda
logan is the only one of the five demons who has common sense and thats mostly how they haven’t been discovered yet
thomas, emile, remy, and possibly other characters are angels who work with virgil in the detective department
Me: I’m gonna make a Wolfstar Good Omens AU! Now, of course Remus will be the angel. He’s shy, kind, bookish, like Aziraphale. Sirius will be the demon, he’s loud, brash, impulsive, like Crowley-
My Brain: switch
Me: Huh? What, why?
My Brain: fits
Me: How does it fit?
My Brain: sirius. family wants to stay ‘pure’, him to follow their lead. family wants war, he doesn’t. remus. dark creature many fear and hate. expected to be dark, evil, but is not (completely. will still cause inconveniences and “pranks”)
Summary: Written for Intrulogical Week 2022 @intrulogicalweek
Logan is stuck in Limbo until the Afterlife Registration Bureau processes his case so he can properly move onto a afterlife, whether that is heaven, hell, reincarnation or something else. While wandering around aimlessly, he's approached by a demon that introduces himself as Remus and offers him a quicker way to the next life.
Content Warnings: Afterlife, Limbo, Demons
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Dr. Logan Croft had lived a fulfilling life. His parents were supportive of him throughout his childhood and beyond, he got along with his siblings for the most part, he got a doctorate in astronomy like he always wanted, became a tenured professor at the same university, and lived to the age of 84 before passing on peacefully in his sleep.
Some might think that he had been missing a partner, but Logan would disagree. Even without a spouse he had a big family since both of his siblings were happily married and had children. They hadn’t lived very far from him and so he was often visited by kids interested in his work. And the time they weren’t around he devoted to his studies, getting lost in research and gaining new knowledge every day.
Of course not everything had been easy and happy. His mother had gotten very sick in her sixties and passed away not long after and his father had never gotten past his grief and eventually developed dementia. Logan ended up getting older than both of them had.
There had been fights, accidents, injuries, even some early deaths with both friends and family but at the end of the line, Logan couldn’t say he wasn’t satisfied with the life he had led.
Which made his passage into the next one seem even worse than it was.
Logan had been stuck in Limbo for a while now. How long exactly was hard to say, time doesn’t function the same as it had on earth. When he had arrived he’d been given some documents by the Afterlife Registration Bureau, told that it would take time for his case to be processed and then he would move on to either heaven, hell, some other type of afterlife or reincarnated (though he didn’t know if it would be on the same earth he knew or not, the papers were very confusing and he was a professor, he knows how to deal with complicated texts usually). Any attempts he had made to get clarification or updates have led him nowhere.
Along with the documents he’d been given a key. Since he was far from the only one who had to wait to move on to the afterlife proper, Limbo had a lot of different, village-like sections and apartment complexes. The apartments within were small, non-descript and empty except for the essentials but they were free of charge. Logan hadn’t mind it much at the beginning, but the blandness was starting to make him depressed.
At least he was back to his twenty-year-old self instead of the eighty-year-old he died as. He had been fit for his age, but it was good to have his full mobility and senses back. He still needed his glasses, though.
There wasn’t much to do or see in the section he temporarily lived in, but Logan was going stir crazy, so he decided to take a walk. He left the apartment, walked down the corridor to the elevator and rode down. In the lobby he met another tenant, they exchanged a short greeting but that was it. Most people Logan had encountered in Limbo weren’t keen on making acquaintances since they figured they would be moving on sometime soon and there was no guarantee that you end up in the same place. He wasn’t much of a socializer either, so he couldn’t fault them.
The outside looked very similar to urban neighborhoods he’d seen on earth, but with higher buildings, no traffic – despite there being streets, Logan had never seen or even heard a car since he got there – and almost no color. Everything was gray, black, white, or very muted. Plants were basically absent, and the few Logan had seen looked lifeless. Which might be just how they looked here; he didn’t know.
He passed very few people as he walked aimlessly through the streets. He didn’t fear getting lost as long as he stayed in the settlement, it wasn’t that big. He wandered until he got to the last few buildings and in front of him opened the endless nothingness of Limbo proper. Other sectors were out there somewhere but there was no sight of any of them.
They were completely isolated. A little bubble in an empty void.
There was one office of the Afterlife Registration Bureau in the sector where one could go for information about the current status of one’s case and to ask questions, but Logan hadn’t found them very helpful. They had mostly told him to wait and that everything will be explained once his case had been processed. When that would be, they couldn’t tell him.
Logan didn’t want to waste time thinking about the frustration about his current situation and so he kept wandering along the border between the sector and the nothingness, humming a song to keep himself occupied.
“Well, well, well,” a voice above him suddenly spoke up. “Aren’t you wandering on dangerous paths?”
Logan stopped in his tracks and looked up. A demon hovered in the air. He looked mostly human, brown hair with a white streak at the front, green eyes that glowed just a bit, light brown skin that was covered by only a crop top and booty shorts as well as a pair of boots. But red horns grew out of his head and just as red wings kept him in the air. He grinned, revealing sharp teeth.
He wasn’t the first demon Logan had seen in Limbo, but they were rare, just like angels.
“I do not see how this is particularly dangerous, I am staying on the road.”
“Sure, for now you are. But if you stare into the void long enough, you might just be drawn in.”
“Is that so? Thank you for the warning. I will take care not to look for too long.” Logan nodded to the demon, figuring the conversation ended and was about to continue his walk when the demon suddenly hovered in front of him.
“Why the hurry? Don’t want to chat a bit?” he grinned.
Logan raised a brow. “I figured that you would not be out here without a purpose and needed to be on your way. I am open to conversation.”
The demon laughed, loud and shrill. “You’re a funny guy! My name’s Remus, what’s yours?” Logan did not understand what the other found so hilarious about his answer, but he didn’t comment.
“My name is Logan Croft. It is a pleasure to meet you.” He held out his hand for the demon to shake. It was gripped with enthusiasm, and he could feel the sharp fingernails of the other digging into his skin. Thankfully, when he pulled away there was no blood.
“Say, Logan,” Remus said, drawing out his name with a teasing smile, “would you be up for spending some time with me soon? I would love to take you out right now but as you correctly guessed, I have somewhere to be.”
“I am not really interested in spending time with a demon. Especially before it is decided where I will be spending my afterlife. I wish you a good day.” Logan attempted to step past Remus, but the other simply floated back in front of him again.
“What if I can help you get there faster? To the afterlife, I mean?”
“Why should I trust that you’re telling the truth? You are a demon, are you not? As far as I am aware, you trick people." Remus acted like he was shot in the chest, throwing himself back into the air, hovering on his back with a hand on his heart.
“How can you accuse me of such horrible things?” he cried. “You don’t even know me!” Logan didn’t react beside raising another brow. He grew up with siblings, he was used to theatrics. Remus glanced at him and giggled when he saw his expression.
“Well, I can’t really blame you for being cautious. But I’m telling the truth! It’s an old custom that if a soul conquers seven challenges set by a demon, it earns a place in the afterlife of its choice.” He grins at Logan again, showing off his teeth. Logan wasn’t convinced and remained silent.
“Oh, come on, necktie!” Remus sighed. “What do you have to lose? It’s not like you are doing something else other than waiting around for the ARB to get a move on. Be proactive, sloth is a sin, y’know. Relieve some of the boredom for both you and me!” he said with a wink.
Logan chewed on his bottom lip. The demon wasn’t wrong, he didn’t have anything else to do and he would be glad for a distraction. But that doesn’t mean it’s not a trick.
“You are not attempting to steal my soul?” he asked for clarification.
Remus snorted. “Nah. There isn’t a point. You’re already dead, there isn’t anything I can do to make you end up in hell now.”
Logan looked him up and down one more time before he shrugged. Might as well.
“Alright. I will attempt your challenges.”
“Wonderful!” Remus did a loop in the air in celebration. “Then meet me here same time tomorrow.”
“That will be difficult,” Logan argues, holding up his watch that had stopped working. “I do not have any means to tell the time down here.”
“If that’s all,” Remus hummed. He took Logan’s arm before the other could react and tapped the watch three times before letting go. “There, fixed.”
With interest, Logan inspected the watch that had changed a bit with Remus’ magic. Remus pointed to where the small hand currently was.
“Just come here when that is back in this place. Unlike the old one, it’ll only make one round per day.”
“Very well. I will see you then, Remus.”
“Looking forwards to it, Wristwatch,” the demon grinned before taking off. Logan looked after him for a few moments before starting on his way back to his apartment. At least he had something to look forward to now.
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“Jannie! I’m home!” Remus called as he entered the house he shared with his boyfriend.
“Welcome back,” Janus answered from the living room. Remus grinned, taking off his boots before following the voice and throwing himself in his partner’s lap, kissing him.
“You are in a good mood,” Janus comments with a smile, pressing another kiss to Remus’ forehead. “Did you have run-in with your brother?”
Remus shook his head. “I found a stuck-up looking guy in sector G to entertain me for a bit.”
“Entertain you, hm? What exactly did you tell him?”
“That he could choose his afterlife if he passed seven challenges I give him.”
Janus raised an eyebrow. “That rule isn’t in effect anymore, Remus.”
“I know,” he grinned.
“Don’t go too far,” Janus said, rolling his eyes. “If he doesn’t get anything out of it, at least make it fun for him as well.”
“Was planning on it. I like him already, so I don’t wanna piss him off too bad.”
“What is your plan if I might ask?”
“Gonna take him out to eat tomorrow. Get to know him a bit better and find out how to tease him best,” Remus grinned, mischievously.
Story Summary: Written for Intrulogical Week 2022 @intrulogicalweek
Logan is stuck in Limbo until the Afterlife Registration Bureau processes his case so he can properly move onto a afterlife, whether that is heaven, hell, reincarnation or something else. While wandering around aimlessly, he’s approached by a demon that introduces himself as Remus and offers him a quicker way to the next life.
Content Warnings: Flirting, Innuendos
This is the last chapter! Thank you all for reading and feel free to send asks if you have any questions about this story or AU! 🥰
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Logan and Janus appeared in a neighborhood unlike any Logan had seen in the afterlife so far. First off, there wasn’t a street, but a stone path, broad enough that about four people could comfortably walk side by side. Second, it was very colorful. Every house was a different color, had different shapes and sizes and yards. But before he could get a closer look at any of them, Janus gently pulled him along towards a two-story house with a large mural of an octopus and a snake painted on it. Logan wondered if that was Remus’ work.
“Alright,” Janus said as they reached the front door. “Remus doesn’t know you’re coming. You’ll stay in the hallway for a moment while I make sure he’s in a condition to talk. I will call for you to come in.” Logan nodded and so did Janus before he opened the door. They entered the aforementioned hallway and Janus continued forwards to the next door that was not fully closed. Behind it came the noises of a television. The demon pushed it open lightly and glanced inside before motioning for Logan to stay put before he slipped inside.
“Remus, dear,” he could hear Janus say. “You haven’t moved since I’ve left, have you?” Remus responded but Logan couldn’t make out what he said. “Well, I won’t stand by this anymore.” The tv turned off and Remus started protesting but Janus cut him off. “You have a guest. Logan, please come in.”
As soon as he stepped into the room, Logan was met with the wide eyes of Remus. The demon looked horrible. His hair looked like it hadn’t seen a brush in a week, his eyes had bags under them, and he wore a long-sleeved shirt. Logan hadn’t seen him wearing anything that went past his elbows so far.
“Jan, wha-“ Remus started, eyes flickering rapidly between his boyfriend and Logan.
“I got tired of your moping, Muse, so I got proactive. I got your books back and had a lovely conversation with the professor over there. He was the one who wanted to talk to you. Now, I’m going into the kitchen. If you dare run away, I will hunt you down and drag you back here by your horns, are we understood?” He stared Remus down who shrunk in on himself and nodded. “Good.” Janus walked back towards Logan; the kitchen was probably through the hallway behind him.
Logan stepped aside to let him through, but Janus stopped in front of him and made eye contact.
“I brought you here so you could hear him out. If you start berating him, I will kick you out.” Without waiting for an answer, Janus left the room. Logan looked after him, speechless after being threatened like that, before his eyes wander back to Remus. The demon sat on the couch, most of his lower body blocked from Logan’s view by the backrest. He wasn’t looking at Logan but staring at his lap, chewing on his bottom lip. Logan took a deep breath before approaching the couch.
“Hello Remus,” he greeted stiffly.
“Hey, Teach,” he responded weakly. He glanced up for a moment but as soon as their eyes met, he looked away. “Kinda having a hard time believing that you want to talk to me. I mean, I know I fucked up. I meant to tell you. I just-“ He sniffed and broke off. Logan hesitated for a moment.
“Could… Would it be alright with you if I took a seat?” he asked eventually.
“Oh. Yeah, sure.” Remus, who had been sitting in the middle of the couch scooted more into the corner to give Logan plenty of room to sit down. Logan muttered a small ‘thank you’ before taking a seat. They sat in uncomfortable silence, neither knowing what to say. Eventually, Logan cleared his throat.
“I was very angry with you,” he started and forced himself to ignore Remus flinching before he lost his train of thought. “I felt like you betrayed me, like you never saw me as anything but a toy, someone insignificant to pass the time.”
“No, Logan, I didn’t-“ Logan held up his hand to get Remus to stop.
“Please let me finish. I will let you talk without interruption afterwards, I promise.” Remus bit his lip but nodded, so Logan continued. “After that first wave of anger had subsided, I got mad at myself instead. After all, I knew from the start that it could’ve been a trick. I knew you were a demon, that you are known to be tricksters. And I agreed to the challenges knowing that they might result in nothing. I agreed thinking that at the least it was a way to pass the time. And I don’t know when I lost sight of that.
“So, I asked myself why I reacted so emotionally then. And why I still felt that sense of betrayal even after realizing that I couldn’t really blame you for tricking me. Which led me to discover that I enjoyed our time more than I had thought. You are a good conversationalist. I don’t know exactly how long we were in that restaurant but talking to you wasn’t boring for even a second. Being in the Rage Room with you, I felt freer than in a long time. And then the library-“ Logan broke off, his cheeks turning pink, and he cleared his throat again.
“My point is that I didn’t really care that our deal was false because I was enjoying your company nonetheless, but hearing from someone else that you tricked me… It made me realize that I was the only one who thought that we had become more than just a convenient distraction for each other.”
It was silent for a moment before Remus quietly asked: “Are you done? Can I talk now?” His tone made clear that it was a genuine question and not a passive aggressive one. Logan nodded.
“Okay, thank you.” Remus slowly exhaled once before continuing. “When I first called out to you, it was just to keep you from getting lost in Limbo because that’s always a hassle to deal with. But you had such a peculiar way of talking that caught my interest and I was bored, so I thought why not mess with him a bit. So, yeah, the deal was entirely to relive boredom. But I didn’t choose you because you were at the right place at the right time. I found you interesting and wanted to learn more about you. I took the first challenge as an excuse to do that.
“When you told me about your job and I could see the passion in your eyes when you talked about space, I started to genuinely like you, but I also couldn’t resist bringing you into the sector with all the people who were your complete opposite. And then, afterwards, when you screamed into the void and kept berating the trash we were bashing, you were so hot, and I instantly got a crush on you. Like, I wanted you to pin me to the wall right then and there.” Remus was so lost in his rant that he didn’t notice Logan’s face turn beet red.
“The whole library thing was just an excuse to get you to kiss me. That was literally my entire thought process. I couldn’t get your lips out of my head, they looked so damn kissable and if we just hang out again, I probably wouldn’t be able to restrain myself… So, yeah, I set that up.
“And then, when I talked to Janny that evening, because I always give him the details of my exploits, he told me that I needed to come clean with you. And I knew that. And I was definitely planning on telling you, I was just really scared that you would be mad at me. Which wouldn’t be as hot as you being mad at a bunch of lunatics. So, I wanted to do something else first.
“I took you on that trip to Heaven and Hell because I genuinely wanted you to get an impression of them because while I can let you choose whichever afterlife you want, you can basically get into either Heaven or Hell if you volunteer to become a demon slash angel. It’s not really something we’re supposed to advertise to all souls because then everyone who wasn’t happy with the afterlife selected for them could just volunteer and then we would actually need to vet people, and no one wants more work.
“But yeah, that was supposed to be like an olive branch to you. And if you wanted to take that route, either Roman or I could recommend you – depending on what your choice would be – and that would basically guarantee that you’d be accepted. It does come with a job but they’re really fair about the amount of work we get, so it’s not that bad a deal. Plus, you’d have full access to the library. But yeah, my brother opened his big mouth before I could tell you.”
Again, silence fell over them as Logan dissected the information just given to him. Remus fiddled with a green blanket in his lap, eyes flitting over to Logan often but not staying on him for more than a few seconds.
“You would have told me that day?” Logan asked in a hushed tone.
“Promise. I really like you, Lo Lo. And I’d love it if you’d stick around. I mean, you can still wait on what the ARB selects for you but just know that it’s an option. And you don’t have to talk to me ever again if you don’t want to, I would totally get that.” Logan nodded along with Remus’ words, his brain filtering all the information at record speed.
“I’ve already received a letter from the ARB.”
“Oh.”
“They plan to send me to be reincarnated.”
“Oh.”
“I was thinking of appealing. I am not really keen on returning to earth. Especially since it seems to be filling with more and more lunatics, as you call them. But this gives me another option to consider. Thank you, Remus.”
“No problem, Doc. I can give you a way to contact me. Or Janus if you’d prefer. Then we can establish a connection with Roman if you’d like.”
“Remus,” Logan called and reached out a hand to keep him from ripping apart the blanket in his lap. When had he gotten close enough to touch? “I am not mad at you anymore. I never truly was. And I do enjoy your company, so I would not be opposed to meeting up with you again.” Remus grinned, suddenly all his bravado returned.
“Do you have a crush on me, Teach?” he asked in a teasing tone, wriggling his eyebrows. Logan’s face heated up again and he avoided eye contact. He tried to pull his hand back, but Remus kept ahold of it. But loose enough that if Logan truly wished, he could escape his grasp. Logan did not truly wish to do so.
“I am unsure. I haven’t experienced emotions like that since my thirties.”
“Wanna make out to find out?” Logan’s blush deepened even further.
“Janus is still in the other room, I’m not entirely comfortable-“
“Oh, Janny left like five minutes ago.”
“What?”
“Yeah, he stayed to make sure you and I wouldn’t start a screaming match but as soon as he realized that we had it under control, he fucked off. Probably to go hang out with my brother and his boytoys.”
“I see.” Logan chose to ignore that last comment. He didn’t feel it was appropriate to ask about Roman’s love life at this moment.
“Soooooo,” Remus grinned again, genuine happiness in his eyes. “Are you up for making out now? Maybe move up to the bedroom?”
“That is a bit fast for me, but I am not opposed to repeating what we did at the library.”
Remus laughed and pulled Logan into his lap.
“You’re rather pure for a man over eighty, aren’t you?”
Before Logan could protest, Remus connected their lips and Logan’s mind went blank, leaning into the sensation.
Story Summary: Written for Intrulogical Week 2022 @intrulogicalweek
Logan is stuck in Limbo until the Afterlife Registration Bureau processes his case so he can properly move onto a afterlife, whether that is heaven, hell, reincarnation or something else. While wandering around aimlessly, he’s approached by a demon that introduces himself as Remus and offers him a quicker way to the next life.
Content Warnings: Gambling, Conflict
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“Hello Remus,” Logan greeted as he opened the door. Remus grinned at him.
“Hey Lo Lo! You through those books yet?”
“Oh, well…” Logan’s face flushed at the memory of how he acquired half of said books. “A few of them I have finished, but most of them I have not gotten to yet.” Remus’ grin became even wider at the sight of Logan’s blush. Logan cleared his throat when he noticed him staring. “Where are we going today?”
“Well, I was thinking. How are you supposed to choose which afterlife you want at the end of the challenges if you don’t know what any of them are about. Y’know, besides reincarnation. So, I decided I would take you on a little tour instead!”
“That sounds indeed logical,” Logan agreed slowly, “but am I even allowed to leave Limbo? You said that technically you weren’t even supposed to take me to Sector Zero.”
“True and yeah, I really shouldn’t do this but I’m a demon so who cares! We’ll go to Hell first and no one there will give a shit. We need to be a bit more careful in Heaven, but we’ll cross that bridge when we get there.”
“And if we do get caught?”
“You can just say I dragged you along. They can’t really hold you to anything, you’re literally just a random soul, you couldn’t get anywhere if you wanted to or threaten me to take you. They’ll just bring you back here and I’ll get a minor punishment. Wouldn’t be the first time. It’s fine.”
Logan eyes Remus for a moment, unsure whether he could trust his words, but he believed that he knew the demon well enough by this point that he wouldn’t just lead him to his doom. And he was curious to see what the infamous realms truly looked like.
“Very well, but I want you to promise to not leave my side. I do not want to be confronted by someone alone.”
“You can hold my hand the entire time if you want, teach,” Remus teased, shimmying his shoulders and causing Logan to blush.
“Good,” he said after clearing his throat again. “Then let’s go.”
Remus grabbed his hand with an excited laugh and they both vanished.
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The noise that crashed into them when they reappeared almost made Logan dizzy. It took him a moment to focus on his surroundings, but he soon saw a sight that was familiar though he never visited such an establishment in life.
“A casino?” he questioned. Next to him Remus was jumping up and down in place, his wings flapping excitedly.
“Yes!” he cheered loudly but it was barely noticed by the other demons that were around them. They were too entranced with their games or conversations and general loudness to pay attention to them. “This is one of my favorite places! It’s Hell nowadays in a nutshell! Fun, parties, and booze!”
“What happened to punishing the sinners?” Logan asked, eyebrow raised as he looked around. Remus waved him off.
“That’s still happening but only with the real assholes, like corrupt politicians, billionaires, war criminals and all that. We didn’t have the capacity to punish every soul for every little thing anymore, so we focused our attention on the big fishes. Now the main difference between Hell and Heaven is… how do I describe it… I guess Hell is a party town, but the houses and stuff aren’t super great, and Heaven has the luxury shit, but they don’t let loose like we do here.”
“Fascinating,” Logan mumbled.
“Any games you wanna try?” Remus asked, hoping that Logan would indulge him. It took a moment, but he wasn’t disappointed.
“Do you have blackjack?”
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“Amazing!” Remus cheered as the finally left the table. “How did you win three times in a row? Were you cheating?!” Logan smiled as he watched him bounce up and down.
“It depends on whether you consider card counting cheating. It technically wasn’t illegal on earth, but most casinos would kick you out if they assumed you were counting.”
“Uhhh! How does it work?” Logan explained the technique to him while they walked around the hall, but none of the other games caught his eye.
“Most cheating is allowed here as long as you aren’t caught,” Remus explained once Logan was finished. “If you are, it’s considered an instant loss.”
“I see. That seems like a good compromise for a place like this with no real currency.”
“Yeah, all bets are just for fun! Though if you lose too much, you might get a cool down for a few days. Just so they don’t end up in a downwards spiral because that isn’t fun for anyone.” Logan nodded in agreement. “Anyway! Ready for our second stop? You’re gonna love it~”
“Now I’m certainly curious. Lead the way,” Logan said with a smile and grabbed Remus’ hand. The demon grinned and teleported them away.
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They reappeared inside a building with wide, white, marble halls. Remus held up his finger to his lips and took a look around.
“Alright,” he whispered, “so far, the coast is clear. But we’ll need to stay quiet. Keep close to me.” Logan was a bit confused but did as he was told. He followed Remus who kept close to the walls and stood still every once in a while to listen for something. Finally, he ushered Logan through a heavy door before slipping inside as well and closing it carefully behind them.
“Okay, we should be safe here for a bit,” he said, not quite whispering anymore but still speaking in hushed tones.
“Where are we, Remus?” Logan asked, getting a bit annoyed. Remus grinned.
“We, my dear professor, are in the only place on this side of life where you can see the stars you love so much.” Logan’s eyes widen and only then it occurred to him that he hadn’t taken a look at the room yet. He turned around and there stood the biggest telescope he had ever seen. It took his breath away.
“Oh my,” he whispered softly. He didn’t notice how Remus watched him with a fond expression.
“We can’t stay long because we are definitely not supposed to be here, but I wanted to show it to you at least. I know Hell is the coolest, but Heavens got some good shit, too. I hope I didn’t make you envious of all the people who get to use this whenever they want.”
“I cannot say that it doesn’t. At least a little bit. Can I go closer?”
“Sure. But better not touch it, I dunno if they got some sensors on it.” Logan nodded in acknowledgement, but his eyes never left the telescope. Remus followed him as he took slow steps forwards, fascinated by the look of pure awe on Logan’s face. But of course, the moment couldn’t last.
“Remus? Is that you? You are not supposed to be here!” a voice called out from another door to their left Logan hadn’t noticed before. There stood an angel, with wide, white wings. He was dressed in a uniform of sorts with a red sash across his chest. As he approached with quick steps, Logan noticed that his brown hair and face structure matched Remus almost exactly.
That is probably the brother he had been told about. A brother that shouldn’t have seen them here.
“Oh, Ro-bro, it’s just you.” Remus breathed a sigh of relieve.
“Just me?!” the angel hissed. “I am here as a guard, Remus, I should arrest you! And who is that?” He nodded towards Logan.
“He’s an astronomer I’ve met a while ago. I just wanted to show him the telescope. We weren’t going to touch anything!”
“Like I believe that!” Remus’ brother turned to Logan. “I am so sorry he has dragged you here. I am Sir Roman. I am a knight. It’s a pleasure to meet you.” He gave a little bow.
“Likewise. My name is Dr. Logan Croft.” Suddenly, Roman leaned closer to him, his eyes squinted. Then he shot around to Remus.
“He’s from Limbo?” he hissed. “You can’t bring the Damned up here and Unassigneds even less so! What were you thinking? Oh wait, you weren’t!”
“We didn’t even do anything!”
“Why did you bring him here?”
“Like I said, he’s an astronomer, I just wanted to show him the telescope!”
“Why am I even asking you?!” Roman threw his hands up before turning back to Logan. “I am so sorry about this, but please tell me your perspective on this? Why are you here with him?”
“Remus said that he wanted to give me an impression of Heaven and Hell before I complete his challenges and get to choose which afterlife I want to go to.” Roman’s eyes wandered back to his brother who was making a cutting motion across his throat. He narrowed his eyes before looking at Logan again.
“I think I know what’s going on now,” he began, and Remus tried to shush him, but he continued talking. “I’m afraid I must inform you that Remus has played a trick on you. The custom of a soul beating seven challenges set by a demon to earn a place in the afterlife of its choosing is no longer in effect.”
Logan froze for a moment before his eyes wandered slowly to Remus who was biting his bottom lip and avoiding eye contact.
“Is that true?” Logan asked him. Remus fidgeted in place for a moment before nodding. Logan took a deep breath before turning back to Roman. “Thank you for telling me. It seems that I fell for the demon’s plot.” He ignored how Remus flinched. “I will remain more vigilant in the future. Would you be willing to bring me back to Limbo, please?”
“Logan, wait-!” Remus spoke up but Logan ignored him again.
“I am sorry for being an inconvenience.” Roman glanced at his brother and saw the deep hurt in his eyes. Maybe he had said too much. But he couldn’t take it back now.
“Of course. I will be happy to escort you.” Logan nodded stiffly, still not looking in Remus’ direction. Roman watched the devastation on his brother’s face before the demon disappeared. He screwed up this time. He really wanted to talk to Patton right away – maybe his boyfriend had an idea on how to fix this – but for now he had to take Logan back.
“Shall we?” he asked, offering his arm for the other to take. He did so without another word and they disappeared.
