Ulyverse kirkwall crew reaction to dentistry:
Merrill: tries to suck the fingers. Then bites. Draws blood, too. Has to be bribed into behaving.
Isabela: "are you gonna put gold in my teeth, sweet thing? Oooh, if you wanted fingers in my mouth you could have just asked~"
Fenris: really normal abt fingers in mouth and detached, clinical prodding. Sooooo normal. So so incredibly ordinary abt this. He's horny gripping his way thru the experience, head pleasantly lust foggy.
Sebastian: Went to the chantry healers and they said they'd have to some heinous shit to him, so he went to anders for a second opinion. Now incredibly nervous bc anders has him lying back and is peering into his mouth, it's very vulnerable, what if anders tries to hurt him or, or take advantage of him [descends straight into fantasy] (he had a cavity or three)
Uly: "it's fine if teeth get knocked out, they'll grow back. They won't? What? Wh—"
Varric: "dwarf teeth are harder than stone, blondie, you don't need to bother," tries everything to get out of a check up. Fails 😔 his teeth are fine tho it's actually infuriating
Aveline: "is this necessary?" convinced that anders is singling her out for torment just bc he doesn't like her.
Bethany: wondering if this is the kind of thing her da would have liked her to do. Good deeds, sticking her fingers in strangers' mouths and pulling out their teeth... Urgh. Gross
Anders: panacea every day keeps his teeth just fine and happy. Most of the time. Has a few false teeth from an Incident in the past that resulted in him losing teeth and a templar being transferred elsewhere