8.6.2018 (4am)
Because I can't do much atm...
I scrolled a bit down on my profile and I saw that I didn't post that much anymore since... I think it's a month now? But not because I am always with my boyfriend, more because of what happens one year ago.
But what did happen one year ago. Tbh I don't want to remember it. I want to forget it. I would do anything to make it unhappen. But it did happen. And I hate it.
It sucks that I made this decision at this time, and I think it will haunt me until I finally forgot what happened... maybe it won't stop. But who knows.
Since this year started I'd never had a good feeling how this year would work out. I don't have a clue what I want to do this coming year, still... my friends I got when this year started are gone. The one who said he would never leave me, left me, again. And it kinda came all in once. It's stupid, I hate that it is like this. It sucks, and I can't make it unhappen. I can make the best things out of what I got right now. But I can't. I feel like I am making one mistake after the next one...
I thought I had gone forward, but it feels like I never made a step forward since six months.
Sorry for crying so much... can't stop it.
