Discover Top Posts Tagged with #dirty pirates

I tour the whole world like a dirty pirate To give the whole club some Miley Cyrus

will.i.am, who definitely does not realize that this makes Miley Cyrus sound like a sexually transmitted disease

Don't mess with my crew.

me: it is the second week of the semester and i am already procrastinating alyssa

me: this is bad

alyssa: i've already skipped a class...

me: we are winners, really

alyssa: we're brilliant

me: i think we should get medals or cookies or trophies

me: or all three, screw it we're awesome

alyssa: damn you i was about to say "or all three cuz we're awesome" but no you had to go steal my thunder

me: YES my medal/cookie/trophy will read "excellent at school and thunder-stealing"

alyssa: well aren't you just special

me: $

alyssa: what?

me: oops! my phone apparently just wants to talk to you

alyssa: oh okay i was like... do you want to rob a bank? do you need me to bail you out of jail? why would britt send me a $???

me: of course you would only think of criminal reasons

alyssa: well we aren't nice people, brittani

#dirty pirates