November 21st, 2016
To the girl who could stand where I stood,
I might hate you. There’s a good chance that I could end up hating you, or maybe highly disliking you. However, the only reason why I would hate you is because you now have the attention of the person who meant the most to me. The attention of the person who I wish I still had the attention of...but I don’t. I know that he is a great person and he would likely try to pick someone else who is a good person, so I suppose I shouldn’t hate you. I should be happy that he found someone like you and now you can make him happy. Which is something I used to do. But in case you don’t know these things, or in case you need help, here are some things that you may need to know about him...if you’re going to stand where I stood.
1. He loves his friends and family, and there are going to be times where it feels like he’s putting them before you. Appreciate that. It means he cares about what’s important in this life. And I promise that even if he’s caught up with them and all of that - you’re still there in his mind or in his sight lines.
2. His place is usually a mess. He’s usually a little bit of a mess. It’s not uncommon for him to have something spilled on his shirt or for him not to notice something on his face when he’s eating. It’s just how he is, but he still takes care of himself.
3. He’s the most gracious person ever. He would absolutely give anyone the shirt off his back, and he will definitely come to you at one in the morning with food if you’re hungry or just to give you a hug if you need it.
4. Once you experience his smile and laugh, you’ll know that there’s nothing better in all of existence.
5. His sides are very ticklish and take advantage of that as much as you can. He’s adorable when he’s squirming away, but be careful. He’ll get you back.
6. When he gets mad, he can be very mad. He may curse or hit something or just get way too into his head, but just stay with him. It’s frustration that he may need help through and I know he appreciates it when you do talk with him.
7. He’s very self conscious. He may not act like it sometimes, but he is. Reassure him when necessary.
8. People like him very easily. They enjoy him right away and they tend to give him a lot of attention. Don’t worry about all of them. He’ll come back to you no matter what and you’re his main priority.
9. He’s always in “the mood,” which can be overwhelming at times...but he’s good at what he does. Just so we’re aware, but get ready for him to want it a lot.
10. Get him in front of a dog. Seriously. It’s the cutest thing ever.
11. He tries to please a lot of different people at once and he can get a little over his head. Try not to get upset if he tries to please others while you get left at the side. He’s trying and it may hurt, but he’s just attempting to make everyone happy.
12. He’s okay with doing nothing. He can just be and doesn’t have to constantly be entertained.
13. He loves to sleep.
14. It’s okay to call him whenever and multiple times. He wants to be there for you.
15. His car is always, ALWAYS a mess. Just prepare yourself. And it probably smells like weed.
16. He’s going to look at you like you put the stars in the sky. Don’t take that for granted.
He’s the most amazing person I have ever had the privilege of knowing. Of holding. Of spending so much of my time with. I will have a weight on my heart knowing that someone else gets to stand where I stood or wish I still could stand, but I hope that you can do better than I did. I hope that you can show him how incredibly special his is, or how enough he is no matter what. He’s so much more than enough, and I’ll forever wish I could show him that every single day.
So please. Just do that for me.
Sincerely, Ava ƹӝʒ