Ok nobody asked but I’m feeling like a little shit tonight so I’m just gonna go ahead and use the headcanon question format thing to fuckin dunk on Chrollo real quick
A (realistic): pretentious asshole probably has like a full library that’s nothing but fuckin........... Kant and the Bible. Just tons of copies of the Bible and a lot of dickhead philosophers. When I was in college, in each class there was always someone referred to (though I doubt ever to their face) as a “that kid”. The ‘never shuts the fuck up even when they don’t have a damn thing to add to the discussion’ type. Chrollo is a that kid and no one can convince me otherwise.
B (hilarious): I don’t even need to make up stuff for this one. Just look at him. His fashion sense is a walking joke. All his shit looks terrible. The fool even ruins the one saving grace he has, looking pretty, by slicking his hair back so it looks greasy and horrible. He looks like he’s on the verge of calling someone a cuck at all times. Despicable.
C (sad): This is a rare occasion where I have no angsty headcanons. This is because the concept of something bad happening to Chrollo is not sad in any way whatsoever to me. Eat shit, Chrollo. You nose in the air fake deep ass smarmy fuck.
D (fuck the canon): The only reason I don’t wish for a world in which he never existed at all is because I like Kurapika’s character arc. I soothe my annoyance at his presence in any scene ever by reminding myself that it would be absurd for him to not get killed the fuck off in some glorious, glorious way. Someday, that moment will come. And while many in the fandom weep, I will be popping some fuckin champagne bottles and partying as hard as I possibly can.
