#douchetech

[kanekoyoshivevo]

simple math // [orbit closed] {{shinsuke}}

Absolutely incredible.

This entire thing was just so incredible, Yoshi wasn't even able to comprehend how incredible it was. He ran a hand through his bangs like he always did when he was stressed  the fuck out. This was terrible. This was all so fucking terrible. There was no way someone would kill over five hundred billion yen. Of-fucking-course someone would. If a fucker managed to kill over a stupid death wish, then a fucker will manage to kill over 525 billion yen. God, he was so disappointed.

The one very underdressed individual catches his eye as he finishes calculating his numbers, and he really wants to go over and strangle the kid because there were clothes provided for a reason. But that would probably look bad right after a second motive.

'Okay, there was a REASON I asked this before, could someone PLEASE fill me in on whatever I missed?'

Wait, wasn't this the new guy? That one that just. Appeared out of some weird alien device after three people were brutally murdered. No wonder he looked so confused. All right, time to be the helpful one.

"... You heard that announcement, yes. This seems to be round two. Watch your back and try not to be the one that gets bludgeoned. And, well. You heard the virus. If you get away with murder, you kill the rest of us as well while you get a trip back to Earth. I highly recommend not trying to get away with murder. We will figure it out. And then you will die. But, that is just advice."

He says everything with the most monotonous voice imaginable, his deadpan stare was probably a little unsettling as he talked about murder as if it was nothing. Of course, it was definitely something, but he tried not to look too affected by it. And, just like that, he crosses his arms and looks the newcomer over once more.

"Kaneko Yoshi. Ex-runway model, current Super High School Level Street Model. My manager has gone AWOL, so no questions for you."

He introduces himself without batting an eyelash, just assuming the other would respond in a similar manner.

[danganorbit-blog]

INTRODUCTION #23: Shinsuke Tsujii

Hope’s Peak. He’d received an invitation to the prestigious school, hadn’t he? Super High School Level Software Developer. But of course, who else would have the title but him? He, developer of the second most used operating system in all of Japan, ＳＡＩＮＴＳ. He remembers leaving from Chiyoda City. He remembers Hiro being a dick before he’d left, as per the usual. "Hey, bro, tell me if you see any hot chicks!" Ugh. Typical. Besides, he hadn’t accepted the invitation to make friends, hot girls or otherwise. 

But… he wasn’t at Hope’s Peak, was he?

Well gee, no shit Sherlock, huh? The fact that he was out cold on the fucking floor was a pretty good hint toward that, yeah? 

Groaning under his breath, he slowly opens bright magenta eyes, or eye, rather, considering that his left eye is obscured by an eye patch bearing the ＳＡＩＮＴＳ OS logo. His next order of business is to huff the hair out of his face, revealing… wow, it’s fucking nothing! Well, there’s something, but it’s blurry as all hell; where are his glasses?

Thankfully, they’re not too far away from his head, and thank all the canonized saints (or ＳＡＩＮＴＳ) that they’re completely in tact. With stubby fingers, he grasps them and shoves them back onto his face, managing to get to his knees and look around and—

Oh. Well then. 

What he’d initially mistaken for some sort of weird screen were actually legs. And those legs were, quite obviously, attached to people (quite literally, he notes, in two cases). Many people, in fact. Brow furrowing, the pudgy boy clears his throat and begins to speak. 

"Um."

Wow. So eloquent. Then again, he wasn’t SHSL Public Speaker or anything.

"What the hell is going on here? I mean, I could be wrong—I don’t think I am—but, y’know, this doesn’t really look like Hope’s Peak to me."

Running a hand back through his dyed powder blue hair, he quickly scans the crowd surround him and the other person. 

"Uh. Yeah. My name’s Tsujii Shinsuke. Now would someone kindly explain what’s going on?”