A Kind Hallucination
She was cold. Oh, so cold. Even on a day when it was 70 degrees outside, the dungeon was freezing. She could see her breath. And she was tired, so very tired. She wanted to sleep, but the cold was keeping her up. The rapid beating of her heart was a drum filling the otherwise noiseless cell. She was scared; terrified, really. But she knew that it could get so much worse. And that it would. If her life continued in the fashion that it was heading, Meg would be dead in a ditch by the age of twenty two.
There was no sense of time in the dungeon. With a lack of light to help differentiate between day and night, Meg was lost. She spent time in that stage of life between sleeping and waking, dreaming of a land and a time when everything was perfect. A time when her mother was alive and able to take care of her doppelganger daughter. Her father would finally love her, and her brothers wouldn't constantly wonder if their little sister was dead. She wouldn't have to worry. She wouldn't have to remember. She could just be.
And then there he was again. Staring at her with those bright blue eyes, a smile hidden in the corner of them. He may have looked angry, but she could see that smile. It was hidden well, but upon careful inspection could be found. For a long time, it had been the one thing that made her happy. When she saw that smile, Meg knew that she was doing something right. That smile was enough to make her want to live. Only, it didn't exist anymore. She knew it was a dream, but she had no plans on stopping it
"Hi, Meg."
She opened her mouth to reply, but no sound came.
"I've missed you."
"I missed you too," she murmured. Then, after a beet asked, "Why'd you do it?"
He sat beside her in silence, thinking. Under any normal circumstances, Meg would have tried to help him come to an answer. But she was so happy to just be seeing him again... She knew that she would give thousands of her already numbered days just to see him again. Even if it was just a dream.
"Because I was tired," he said, finally. "I was tired of my abusive father, I was tired of my dying mother. I was tired of my addictions, and the pain they gave me. I was tired of school, tired of friends, tired of trying... I was just tired."
"I miss you so much," her voice was little more than a breath, and tears were springing from her eyes.
"Don't cry, Meggie," he murmured, wiping away the tears with the pad of his thumb. "You'll break my heart."
"I loved you," the tears were coming faster now. "With all of my heart, I loved you. Why did you have to leave me?"
"Because you were better off without me. I was toxic, and you needed to get better."
"No, I wasn't!" she nearly shouted, angry despite her sadness. "No one was! Your mother died of what I can only assume was heartbreak, your father hung himself, and I... Fuck, I loved you!"
"I know, Meggie," he said, calm as ever. "I'm sorry."
"Sorry won't bring you back!" she screamed. She stood up and screamed. And she screamed and screamed until her voice was gone completely from her body. Then she broke. Meg crumpled to the ground next to him and wept silently for what felt like hours. She could feel his hand on her back, in what must have been an attempt to comfort her.
"I'm tired," she eventually whispered. "So tired."
"I know," he said, wrapping his arms around her and bringing her body close to his. "Just sleep, love. It'll all be over when you wake up."
