Hey so I am actually taking a crack at writing a davekat fic, and I wanted to know what you guys think. so...here i guess? also its not finished yet, and yeah here we go! It's called "Dude I Just Want to See How Much Aj I Can Chug"
“Dude I just want to see how much aj I can chug!” Dave pushes in an excited yell. Your name is Rose Lalonde and your ecto-brother is being an idiot. You decide to attempt to intervene his antics.
“Dave, as much as Kanaya and I want to see you piss your pants after downing a gallon of aj-“
“Who says it’ll be a gallon? It could only be four quarts-dang that’s the same thing…uh, it could only be two quarts! You don’t know how much I can chug! Or do you? Did you look into the future while I was ranting about gallons and quarts and see that I will chug an entire gallon of apple juice?” he goes on like this for a few minutes and you finally just go back to what you were doing.
==>Rose: What were you doing anyways?
You were actually about to attempt to alchemize this weeks food supply, since it’s your turn because you lost to Karkat in the tournament of Rock-Paper-Scissors. You exit the common room, but not before drawing a dick on Dave’s arm as you walked by. Kanaya had apparently seen you, because you saw her chuckle and put a hand up against her forehead.
Walking down one of the many dark hallways, you follow the memorized pathway and finally reach the alchemiter that is located within the small meteor. You type in the controls, and then grab the gigantic bag that Karkat said everyone should use to drag the large quantity of food back to the common room.
==>Rose: Shove the food into the bag and easily bring it back
You shove everything in easily, but this time you might have to drag it back. After all, you did manage to alchemize 5 gallons of apple juice. You figured out that by combining a clown nose, a piece of red chalk, and getting a dream jade to draw a picture of an apple onto a captchaloge card, you can alchemize an apple. Dragging the bag back is no easy matter, and you should know; Dave gets you to take his shift and you get really frustrated with him sometimes.
This time, however, you’re going to help him while simultaneously getting payback. You know that Dave and Karkat totally have it bad for each other. You, being the genius you are, are going to get Dave to confess to Karkat using your genius plan.
You’re going to lock them in a room together without them knowing it was you. You love yourself sometimes.
==>The Knight of Time obviously!
Well sheesh when you put it that way!
Whoa why are we shouting? You don’t even know. Your name is Dave Strider, and you are trying to wipe off the dick that your ecto-sis drew on your arm. God damn it Lalonde! You manage to rub off the majority of it, leaving a faint mark of a penis and a red spot on your arm from rubbing on it really hard. Why do you guys use Sharpies for everything again?
Standing up, you exit the room and head down the hallway that leads to Can Town. Peeking your head in the room, you see that Terezi and the Mayor are building what looks to be a library, due to the sign on it that has ‘L1BR4RY’ written on it in blue chalk. You chuckle, but don’t particularly feel like dealing with politics today, so you retreat your head and thoughts from the room.
==>Dave: Receive message on your Foam-Ass Communicator.
“Dave, this is Rose. Please report immediately to the room next to mine. We have something to discuss involving a gallon of apple juice.” Oh hell yes. You have been waiting for this all day. You immediately head towards Rose’s room. You are pumped for this!
When you get to the room, you step inside, only to have Rose say a spooky, ”Hello Dave. I have been waiting for you. I am also waiting for Karkat. Now stay here, I’ll be right back.” And with that, she leaves the room, and you hear the sound of a door locking. God damn it Rose.
You are now the other knight that is stuck on this god-forsaken meteor for three human years. You are Karkat Vantas, and you are heading to the room next to Rose’s because she said, “Karkat please come to the room next to mine, I have a super cool movie that I know you’ll love.”
You arrive and she is waiting outside the room. She opens it and shoves you in and before you can pry it open again, she locks it. Turning your head, you see that Dave has the same fate as you. Rose happily remarks through the door, “You two need to sit the fuck down, and tell each other how you feel. You know what I mean. Now I am going to talk with Kanaya, and I will be back in an hour. If this problem is not resolved, bad things will happen.”
“Dave, what the hell is she talking about?” you ask, a tad bit nervous. You really are terrible at hiding things. Yeah, that blood color? All you did was put the color gray on instead, as if they wouldn’t find it. Dave sits down on the floor. He rolls up his sleeve and picks at scabs that had formed on his arm.
“I could ask you the same question,” he replies. You don’t want to do this right now. You wanted this to be like your movies; where the main protagonist would write a cute note, or they might meet up with the love interest in the pouring rain, and they would kiss under a lamppost. You did not want to end up stuck in a room, forced to confess the fact that you human-love this nerd boy.
“Okay, you’ve got me,” Dave blurts out. “I love you man. I fucking love you so goddamn much.” Holy shit, did he really say it first? Are you going to be the one who has to reply back with a cheesy “I love you even more” or some shit? Is this your life? You quit asking yourself these stupid questions, while simultaneously cursing past-you.
“Dave I-fuck okay I thought this would be less awkward as hell, but yeah I feel the same way.” Dave face breaks out in a dorky and adorable grin. No, not a grin; an ecstatic smile. His whole face lights up like a rainbow drinker that had just fed on fuchsia blood. He rubs his arm a bit, and scoots over to you. You decide to take a seat on the floor as well. What idiot forgot to put furniture in here?
“So… goddamn it this is way more awkward than I expected. Okay, so does that mean I can kiss you?” he asks. Your face goes as red as his cape.
