Impromptu Drink Review: 4Loko Black Brewer: Phusion Projects, LLC ABV: 10% in Tennessee, up to 14% elsewhere Class: Malt Liquor
Okay, first of all why are you calling this 4Loko Black when it is clearly nuclear ninja turtle green?
Anyhow, this thing smells sweet and sticky, like the floor of a cheap theatre that may or may not show porn after midnight. It's a bubbly little beverage that tastes like a papaya, if it was rotten and hated you. So much sugar, argh. Gives me indigestion and also maybe constipation? Lordy.
From the press release: “Working with popular artists, such as Flosstradamus and Riff Raff, gives us the opportunity to connect directly with our fans at events that are relevant to them,” said Freeman. “We have big plans for Four Loko Black in 2018 and these partnerships give us some exciting momentum as the product hits the shelves. If the launch of Four Loko Gold is any indication, we think consumers will love it.”
WELL GODDAMMIT SON IF IT'S GOOD ENOUGH FOR RIFF RAFF IT'S GOOD ENOUGH FOR BARF BARF BARF.
Has an aftertaste of glowsticks and deep regret.
Hard pass, drink responsibly.
