Hey there! Ima little sloshed right now & was thinking a tipsy/drnk Q at the Christmas or summer garden party com8ng on to Bond... authors choice for how hot it gets. (reeeeeally hot sex welcome & encourage )(thank jeebus for auro correct) – masterofhounds
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This isn't AT ALL based on Drunk!Lex. Nope. Not at all. (ahem). Jen.
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Three shots of vodka, two tequila, two and a half glasses of wine and a pint of cider. Bond had counted. Q could not hold his drink; to be fair to the man, he didn't look large enough for his bladder to hold that much, let alone his liver. He did look... happy, while dancing ludicrously with an equally inebriated R, if incredibly uncoordinated. Thankfully he had the sense to smoother himself in sun cream, avoiding the lurid sunburn that would surely plague most of his department in the morning.
“Ten quid says he vomits before the end of the night,”
Bond looked to his boss; Mallory was smirking along the same line of sight.
“Twenty says he won't remember it.”
Mallory grinned, nodded. “I'll take that bet.”
R and Q seemed to be conspiring, alarmingly enough.
“Hiiiiiiiiiiiii.”
Mallory took a step back, allowing their Quartermaster to quite literally chuck himself at Bond; Bond had a bit of a mission to catch him in time, to prevent both toppling over unceremoniously. “Hi, Q.”
“Psst.”
“Yes?” “You're gorgeous,” Q said happily. “Like a car.”
Bond blinked, not entirely sure how to respond. Across the room, R had toppled herself at 001, who looked just as terrified as Bond felt.
Like Bond, though, she wasn't all that upset.
“Are you a little drunk, Q?”
Q snorted. “A little? I'm a big bit little drunk. 'therwise I wouldn't be talking to you about cars. Well. Not the gorge... sexy cars. Sex and cars. You like sex and cars.”
Succinct, but accurate. “Yes. Yes, I do.”
“I like you.”
“I'm getting that idea, yes.”
“D'you like me?”
Bond could get used to Q like this. He was open and honest, and very endearing. “Yes, Q.”
Q grinned, eyes wide; he peeled off Bond, and turned over his shoulder to yell deafeningly across the entire room: “R!!! IT WORKED!!!”
By that point, R had her tongue halfway down 001's throat, and didn't care tremendously.
And so, with very little tact and even less finesse, Q attached himself to Bond's mouth for the rest of the evening.
