#drunk schlatt

[schpooky]

Drunk in the city w schlatt

I tried to make the vid kinda 'drunk vibey' ?? lmk if you see the vision lmao

[jxllypxp]

And a Happy New Year

A/N: ok so y’all know the newest Joe Bartolozzi ep? Where Schlatt is chugging down schnapps? Yeah well I've been thinking about big guy would act after they’re done filming and it melts my heart thinking about it. So, please enjoy.

It’s been a good fifteen minutes since you heard them end the discord call from the living room, but Schlatt has yet to leave his office. It’s not uncommon for him to spend some time in his office after finishing a podcast recording, but it’s usually followed by the sound of a videogame or video he's editing. There's no sound coming from the room though, so you make your way down the hall to check up on him.

You open the door to find him leaning back in his chair, pretty lashes brushing his cheeks. Your eyes flick to his desk which has a bottle of peppermint schnapps sitting on it, the poor guy must have had a bit going on and had a bit more than he could handle. You gently shake him to wake him up.

“Hey big guy,” His eyes flutter open gently and he looks up at you with a pout on his pretty lips, “aw, sweetheart why don’t we get you to bed?” 

He groans as you help him out of the chair leading him to your shared room, and pulls you down with him as he lays down on the bed. Through your giggles you can hear him start to say something.

“You’re perfect for me y'know that sweetheart?” it’s not unusual for Schlatt to get sentimental when he’s had a bit too much to drink. He’s always clingy and sappy and you couldn’t love him more than you do when he’s sappily letting you know just how much he loves you. “So good t’me, and you’re so pretty, and you’re all mine.” 

“That’s right sweetheart, I'm all yours.” you stroke his hair as you coo at him. Not very long after your confirmation he’s dozing off sure to be whining about his headache in the morning. which is why he’s so thankful to have a pretty girlfriend like you to leave an aspirin and a glass of water out for him.

A/N: I CAN"T BELIEVE I DIDN'T POST THIS????? Maybe i did and just didn't link it in Schlatt's masterlist???? If not umm here's a mini fic that was rotting away in my drafts????

[broken-bottles-of-jack]

The presidents office, widely known to be a very off limits space, one that anyone aside from the Vice and Fundy was allowed to be. But here it was, doors wide open with a very (close too) passed out President JSchlatter , mumbling incessantly to himself, whiskey tumbler in hand, and an almost empty bottle of Jack Daniels on his desk. The President’s tail waved wildly, ears flicking at the slightest of noise, with his suit pressed so prim and proper, framing his body and making him appear oh so intimidating.

But then he turned around, making direct eye contact to the one who stood outside his door. “The fuck are you doing here?”