Sigh.
Being part of a large fandom is usually comforting—exciting, even. There's a sense of community, shared joy, and nostalgia.
But then there are moments like this. And they really take the air out of it.
You’ve probably guessed I’m talking about Doctor Who. What you may not know is that it's recently come to light that one of the show's stars from the 1980s put his hands on a fellow guest—someone I know and care about—at an unrelated science fiction event. This happened in full view of others, captured on CCTV, security got involved.
That same event has now announced this actor as a featured guest for their next gathering.
My friend, who hadn’t spoken publicly about it until now, shared her experience, expressing her disappointment that the event would have the celebrity back. And the response from parts of the fan community has been, frankly, appalling.
The flood of “I met him once and he was lovely” stories—usually involving paid autographs or photo ops—seems less about support and more about denial. The victim-blaming has ranged from subtle undermining to outright DARVO. Witnesses have been dismissed. And in some circles, the focus has turned to protecting the man's reputation rather than addressing what he did.
Every time I think we’ve made progress, some familiar pattern re-emerges: a charismatic man crosses a line, and instead of listening, people rush to excuse, deflect, or minimize. It's disheartening.
I’m not here to tell anyone what to watch, who to support, or where to draw their personal boundaries. That’s up to each of us. But I am asking—hoping—that as a community, we can start by choosing empathy. That we can resist the instinct to protect the powerful and instead create space for those who speak out, especially when it costs them something to do so.
We can do better. And we should.
