#dymo tape

[dynamoe]

When I have insomnia, and wake up at 4 AM, I just make stuff.

↳ BACK TO FAILURES OF SCIENCE INDEX

↓↓ Story lines in this collection ↓↓

1990— Bitter Melon

White prepares to head out to happy hour, leaving 16 year old Billy home alone. Billy whines about being left behind, and decides to fuck a melon.

White drunkenly complains to the bartender how he betrayed his best friend multiple times, the latest crime sending Billy to an OSI-front therapist— a robotic psychiatrist named Dr. Eliza Sbaitso.

1991— Give My Regards to Carmen Sandiego

White gets a job as a flight attendant, hides Billy in his carry-on and the two fly to Europe for a barnstorming tour of newly independent former Soviet republics, looking to snap up decommissioned Soviet lab equipment (and secret Cold War super science inventions) for pennies on the dollar, and through translator error and general misunderstanding accidentally become oligarchs. Are chased by Interpol. Cause an international incident and get airlifted out of Turkmenistan by the CIA.

1994— Spring Break Broke

Pete steals the seed money and runs away to Spring Break, but he feels old. (Longer summary on AO3)

1995 — Kidnapped Again, Naturally

Alison comes to pick up Billy to go to the movies, but Pete explains Billy has been kidnapped. They go to the International House of Pancakes where Pete gives her a primer on why Billy keeps getting kidnapped and how Conjectural Technologies and the super science trade works.

1996 — Quizboy Goes to Prom (A Murder Mystery)

Alison and Billy go to prom on a river cruise boat but the boat pilot is knocked out and the teacher chaperone dies under mysterious circumstances. All the students are trapped on the boat with a murderer. Billy saves them all and gets them to shore.

CHOOSE YOUR OWN ADVENTURE: After Tomorrow's Just Another Day

1996a— Tomorrow Never Dies, or How to Get Ahead in Super Science

Alison is dead. Billy does the one thing super scientists are never, never supposed to do— brings her back from the dead. All he could save was her severed head.

1996b— A Great Big Beautiful Tomorrow

Alison is alive and never moved away. She and Billy have an apartment together where she works and he takes care of the house. He discovers that for the first time since he was 7, he's growing taller.

199X— Body Swap/Freaky Versa

An unexpected experiment leads Pete and Billy switch bodies, discover how much of their skills are body-based and which traveled with the mind-swap as Pete is now a genius but never learned anything useful to apply his brainpower to and he can't make the mechanical hand movie. Billy has two eyes now but can't see shit

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