Post workout PM (yes I AM eating late at night humph !) some watered down low cal grape Gatorade ((YUMM) and water and soda water aka carbonated water aka seltzer aka bubbly water (SOO many various names for it lol) and then some blueberries (guess who did not count or measure the blueberries?! ME. also. I ate all of em even tho my Ed mind was screening at me that eating the blueberries was gonna detract from the hard work out I just did. Shut up I want no nightmares tonight 🙁😔 yes I am not following a path of recovery but here & there I try just to be able to post here and try to convince others as well as myself (wherever I've gone to...) that maybe it isn't bad. That maybe there is a speckle of hope to keep up for. Stay strong tonight. I'll do so too! Not gonna body check!! 😬 come on ladies and gents let's be as strong as we can tonight/today. Xxo #edfightback #girlswitheds #boyswitheds #anxiety #PMsnack #HSsnack #compensation #recoveryisntlinear #dontknowwhereistand I REALLY HOPE I WAKE YP TOMORROW AND REMEMBER TO PUT G-D FIRST AND SAY THANK YOU FOR LETTING ME LIVE ANOTHER DAY. PTW?... I have alarms set for the gym tomorrow AM after I weigh myself and then therapy after. Usually I run after therapy because it's so hard and I can turn off emotions usually with running on empty if you will, so I'm a tad nervous to see what will happen if I feel too dizzy already where I won't be able to run as long or fast after therapy. What if I can't at all?!?! NO. need to calm my mind. Shh. Bedtime. Night