Getting on that 2019 art summary train? Sure thing.
Gotta admit this year has been crazy in a good way, I can say that I experimented a lot, some came out good some not really but I did push myself to try something different. The support from you guys has been amazing this year and I literally couldn't have asked for more. As the year comes to an end in few days - I can say I’m satisfied.
Is Henrik ever gonna get to date Chase in the mod au though? Or will he just pine forever
Always asking the right questions :D Here’s the first part, you kind of have to read it for this to make sense :)
Ship: Schneeplebro (for real this time)
CW: medical situations (but nothing graphic)
Henrik had woken up slowly, in increments. He had felt like he was dreaming until his hearing returned, bringing with it evidence of the outside world. It was still pretty quiet, the hum of machines and quiet breathing the only thing breaking the silence for a while. The sounds along with the smell of disinfectant and clean linens (ah, there was his sense of smell,) told him he was in his clinic. Or at least in a hospital.
He was… strangely unconcerned about this. Henrik suspected they'd given him the good drugs, which honestly didn't bode well for whatever had happened to him.
He tried to slowly feel out his body. Feet, ok. Legs, no problem. Hands -
He flexed his fingers around something soft and the slow breathing next to him turned into a gasp.
"Henrik?"
Chase.
God, he sounded wrecked. Henrik opened his mouth to assure him he was fine, but when he breathed in something… happened. Dull pain accompanied a feeling of… pressure, like there was a heavy weight on his chest. Breathing suddenly became hard as he tried to pull in air in surprise. For a single, terrifying second it was as if he would never be able to breathe again.
And then Chases warm hands settled on his shoulders, drawing his focus like a slap to the face.
"Slow breaths, Henrik, shallow. Your rib cage is kinda messed up right now, you shouldn't talk. It's okay. You'll be fine."
Henrik followed the advice and slowly the pain settled - and Henrik felt another wave of drowsiness sweeping over him.
He managed to open his eyes for a single, golden second, and the blurry image of Chases teary smile followed him into hazy dreams.
This was it. This was what would finally push him over the brink. He’d survived dealing with the Family’s madness for years, and this was the end of it. He’d go mad, right here in his own clinic, confined in bed.
Alex had proved completely immune to his bullying as he tried to leave early. It was good, in a way: they’d need to be able to hold their own against patients, especially if they were going to stick around with the Family. Henrik would have been proud of his protege if he wasn’t absolutely jittering out of his skin with boredom, confined to the bed for who knows how long.
Henrik knew how long. A chest wound like his, he’d keep the patient in the hospital for ten days at least - two weeks, if they were being ornery, with check-ups and physical therapy lasting several months. He’d at least badgered Alex into giving him the medical report. Reading about himself in third person was rather odd, especially when learning just how close he’d come to death. Just a few more minutes… Henrik shuddered and pushed the thought out of his mind.
He’d been lucky. The bullet hadn’t hit anything vital and only grazed a rib on its way in, lodging itself firmly in the muscle just beside his spine. A few centimeters either way, and he’d be dead. A few minutes later, and he’d be dead.
Henrik had needed to lie down and nap after that. He didn’t understand how his regular patients managed to get through these life-threatening situations over and over again. Just the once was leaving him shaking and pale at the realization of his own mortality.
Luckily, Chase had been there, and the warm, steady hand on his shoulder helped stem the tide of dread washing over him.
That was another reason Henrik was going to lose his goddamn mind. Chase was just. There. He’d been there from the moment Henrik opened his eyes for good, all mental faculties online, and he had barely left to shower and change when Alex started yelling about hygiene and recuperation rates.
(Alex would make a damn fine doctor one day. Hopefully they'd decide to be a damn fine doctor still in the Family's employ.)
But for the rest of the time, he was just… there. At Henrik’s side. They’d talk, but Henrik found himself growing tired fast. His body was busy healing from a near-fatal wound, it would not allow him to spend his energy talking with his crush all day long. But even when Henrik was resting, or reading, or simply staring out the window, Chase was there. He’d set up a laptop and a small mountain of comic books on a small table and seemed to be pretty much running the Family right there from Henrik’s bedside.
Henrik didn’t get it.
Sure, they were friends. Had been for a long time - Henrik sometimes fancied himself Chase’s oldest friend. They’d gone through a lot together. But this was not something regular friends would do. And yes, of course Henrik would spend his every waking moment at Chase’s side if he was hurt - had done so already, in fact. But he was Chase’s doctor and had been in love with the man for years.
Chase had no such reason. In fact, if anything, he’d have any excuse to not sit around in Henrik’s room - he had a criminal empire to run, after all.
But despite all of these very good reasons not to be there, and lacking any good reason to stay, still Chase was at his side.
Of course Henrik was not going to question it. Maybe he should have, but… he was a selfish man, in the end, and having Chase there fulfilled some deep longing in his chest. It felt right, and good, and he could almost pretend… no. He wouldn’t do that to his friend. But if he wanted to stay, Henrik wasn’t going to stop him. He wasn’t strong enough, no matter how bad he felt about it.
It took the full two weeks until Alex let him go, the bastard. Even then it was only with a long list of exercises and rules to follow, along with the holy promise of both Chase, Jacques and Anti to not let him do anything more strenuous than walking around the house for the next month.
Henrik had argued, of course, but he'd been summarily outvoted by the assembly. Why the matter of his own damn health was up for a vote was another question entirely.
Once that had been decided, Chase had watched the others leave and turned to Henrik, still sitting on his bed and trying to conceal how tired he was just from shouting at his brother.
"Henrik?" He'd said, voice soft.
"Yes?"
"Would you… I'm not sure…" Chase paused to find the right words. Henrik could have told him there was no need - there was no way he was denying Chase anything when he looked like that.
Finally, Chase sighed.
“Henrik, I think you should stay at the mansion while you recover.”
Henrik blinked. Carefully shoved down the hope and confusion into the deepest pit of his brain. Took a deep breath.
“Okay.”
Now it was Chase’s turn to try and hide his surprise.
“Just - like that? After all that arguing?”
Henrik winced. He didn’t think he’d been that abrasive, but. Well. This was another matter, wasn’t it? He realized Chase was still waiting on an answer and shrugged carefully.
“At least there I can still keep an eye on you?” He tried. Henrik had expected Chase to call his bluff, but Chase just laughed softly and then he -
Then he took Henrik’s hand and god, Henrik was a teenage schoolboy again, looking away to hide the burgeoning blush on his cheeks.
“Always looking after me, doc,” Chase said softly, and Henrik could only nod. God, if this was going to be his every day for the next few months…
Three weeks in and Henrik was pretty sure he’d gone mad by now. There really was no other explanation. Perhaps he’d died and ended up… somewhere. Somewhere where this made sense.
He did not believe he'd deserved heaven, but if this was hell the ball hadn't dropped yet.
Henrik was terrified of when it would.
Chase was. Doing Things. Henrik couldn’t put his finger on any one big event but hope was bouncing in his chest with every wobbly step forward.
There was the handholding, of course. It had started in the clinic and never really… stopped? Chase kept taking his hand at every opportunity: to guide him around the mansion, to help him down the stairs… Every time, every single time, his face would go soft and searching, and Henrik had to look away to hide his blush, to stop himself from lacing their fingers together and never letting go.
But that wasn’t all. Every bit of touching had ramped up. From handholding to soft touches to his arms, shoulders, waist… It had started slow, just trying to get Henriks attention. When he didn't complain - god, was he not complaining - Chase began putting an arm around his waist when they were talking, leaning his head on his shoulder when he was bugging Henrik about work… When they sat down to watch a movie, it hadn't taken long before Chase had performed the fakest yawn of human history and put his arm around Henriks shoulder.
Henrik hadn't moved an inch for the rest of the night, not even when Chase nodded off and began snoring into his ear.
Worst of all, though… was the pet names.
They were rare, but every time Chase added on a "dear" to the end if his sentence, Henrik had to fight hard to not just shut down for the rest of the day.
Henrik loved it, of course. He also felt like there were hooks driven into his flesh slowly ripping him to pieces. Whatever was going on was upsetting the carefully maintained equilibrium of his emotions and he could not handle becoming a pining mess right now. He had a job and bills to pay, for god’s sake.
But Henrik still found himself gently but relentlessly romanced. There really was no other way of describing it. His inner fourteen year old, to kid who had sighed over romance novels in secret, was absolutely stunned by what was happening. He could barely believe it, and the small, fragile hope he'd been nursing for so, so long was slowly starting to bloom.
He still wouldn't do anything, of course. He had been wrong before.
And Henrik was too tired, too old, to break his own heart in that way.
In the end, he didn't have to: Chase was, as always, much braver than he'd ever been.
It had been a lovely evening. They had eaten an amazing dinner (ordered in: neither of them were any good at cooking) and then settled in one of the glass-encased verandas hidden away in the mansion, watching as the sky slowly darkened.
It had been a celebration dinner: Henrik was progressing well with his therapy, and Alex had judged him fit to work within the week.
(As impatient as Henrik was to start working again, he could not help the pang of sadness at those news. He'd miss the mansion, miss seeing Chase in his soft unguarded moments. He tried to put that away for now, though: for Chases sake if nothing else.)
Henrik was full of cheese and wine and love, and with only one blanket between them they were curled together to stay warm.
It was all absolutely perfect, and Henrik knew he would be remembering this moment for a long time.
And then. Then Chase turned towards him, ever so slightly, with a content smile on his face.
"Hey Henrik?"
"Mhmmm?" was Henriks response, already lost in thought and comfort.
"May I kiss you?"
Henrik was suddenly wide awake. He couldn't have told you what kind of noise he made in response to Chase's question, but it got a gentle laugh out of him. Henrik remained stiff and tense, unable to reply, unable to think. He only vaguely heard what Chase said after that, but the clear worry in his tone made him claw his way back to understanding.
"-od, I'm sorry, Henrik, I didn't want to be too pushy but since you'll be able to leave tomorrow I thought -" He stopped himself and pulled away slightly. Every cell in Henriks body screamed at the loss.
"I'm sorry, I shouldn't have assumed. I'll- I'll go. If you want." He finally looked up at Henrik, voice sad and tired, and Henrik still couldn't find his words for fucks sake -
Kissing Chase was something Henrik had wanted to do for… longer than he could remember. The desire had always been there, a little bit - when Chase was rambling and saying stupid things, when he did that sad thing with his eyes, when he laughed, when he cried… and now, with Chase worried and doubtful, it was overwhelming.
In the end, it wasn’t his own desire that pushed him to do it. It was seeing Chase scared, feeling that same, bone-deep fear of rejection that Henrik was so intimately familiar with.
The kiss was simple. Chaste. Henrik had his palm against Chase’s cheek, thumb running soothingly across his skin even as Chase slowly, slowly melted and reciprocated, carefully pulling Henrik closer.
It was as if Henriks every thought had just stopped. His world falling away and rebuilding itself in the space of a breath, in the time it took him to slip his hand into Chase's hair and deepen the kiss. Chase made a noise like he was dreaming, hands slipping along Henriks arms as if to reassure himself this was real. Henrik could barely believe it either, but the slick sweetness of Chase’s mouth wiped away all such thoughts.
He tasted like red wine and cheese and Henrik suddenly began believing in miracles.
After several minutes of slow, careful kissing Henrik slowly, slowly began pulling back, going back to peck Chases lips once, twice, three times before he pulled back entirely. He blinked his eyes open to find them blurry with tears. Before he could do anything about them Chase’s hand was there, wiping them away with a gentle laugh.
Henrik laughed as well, dry and broken. This - the something in his chest, the little ball of pain and longing, had bloomed into a heated core, warming him from the inside out as he stared at Chase’s face.
"I love you," he blurted out, still laughing, still crying, and Chase smiled like the sun and moon and he loved him, he loved him, he loved him. Nothing could be better than this.
"I love you too," Chase whispered and kissed Henriks cheek. He'd been wrong. This was better, so much better, and Henrik laughed again.
"How long?" he demanded, suddenly needing to know how long they could have had this, how much time had been lost. No, not lost - but different.
Chase shrugged.
"I don't know. But I realized- I realized when you got shot. That I couldn't - I couldn't go on without telling you." He stroked his fingers along Henriks cheeks again, because he hadn't stopped crying and didn't know if he ever would. "How about you?"
Henrik had thought of this question many, many times. Was it when Chase helped him out and gave him a job? When he stood at the wedding and hoped everyone would think he was crying from happiness? Was it when Chase, fifteen and tired of school, fell asleep on his shoulder on the bus?
In the end, none of it mattered.
"Forever," He said, and turned his head to kiss the palm of Chase’s hand. "But it doesn't matter." It didn't. No matter how many years it had been, it had led them to this moment. He smiled and leaned forward, setting his forehead against Chases and closing his eyes with a sigh.
Listen... I started it like a MONTH ago and today I finally forced myself to sit and bring it to the final stage. At this point I’m not even sure if I’m 100% satisfied, I stared at it for too long to decide so I’m trusting @murder-schmurder with the judgement... Anyway
Don’t piss off people who smile, their smile will be the last thing you see 👀
In some weird alternative mob universe where sanders sides, jse egos and my original characters are able to interact, don’t @ me even, it’s because @murder-schmurder @dorkydinoart @enderoid @dead-inside-mcgee @fleecal and whoever heccin else even started about talking to me about Sanders Sides Mob AU and Pat being the boss
Patton (TS), Chase (JSE) and Hektor (WB)
so, I take no part in this... I just bring the goods :”) 🙌
I wish you would write a fic where Antimarvelsepticeye goes on an awkward first date
Max you are a fucking delight this is exactly what I needed to write today
Mob AU, because of course
Ship: antimarvelsepticeye
CW: Unedited we die like men
Jackie checked his watch for the fourteenth time in five minutes.
They’d agreed to meet up at the cafe to talk about their plans - it was a good, unassuming place, where no one would look for them. When they’d decided it had all been very formal: a meeting time, an agenda, updates on their respective fields of responsibility. All official and good.
But… the cafe was very nice. Old-fashioned. Intimate. Jackie did his very best not to look at the couples being cute in warm afternoon sun that bathed the street.
It was not a date.
“Hey, Jackie!” Jackie jumped a little at the call, waving when he saw Anti jogging over to him with a sharp grin. He had a black leather jacket slung over his shoulder and a tanktop that left nothing at all to the imagination. Jackie swallowed.
“Hey!” He held out his hand for a handshake, but Anti went right in for a hug. startled, Jackie responded, only to realize his mistake as Anti went for a quick pound to his back before trying to extract himself, despite Jackie’s arms around him still pulling. Instantly, Jackie stepped back, hand on the back of his neck.
“Ah sorry-”
“Sorry, I-”
They both fell silent, waiting for a response. When none came, Jackie laughed awkwardly.
“Wanna go grab a table and order? Marvin should be coming soon.”
Anti kicked a pebble off the street and smiled.
“Yeah. Let’s.”
Anti had never been a man of many words, and somehow Jackie found that soothing. He smiled, and they entered the cafe together. Anti went a got a table in a secluded corner, right by the front window, while Jackie went to order. A dark black coffee for Anti, a pumpkin latte for him, and a dirty chai for Marvin, whenever they showed up.
Once he’d paid, gotten the drinks, and carried them back, Anti looked up from his phone.
“hey, thanks.”
“No problem,” Jackie replied, sitting down opposite Anti and sipping his drink. Anti had some of his own, and the awkward silence settled once again. Anti was looking out the window, Jackie was looking at his coffee.
For not being a date, Jackie sure felt those date jitters crawling up. What if he was boring? What if Anti left?
“Uh, how’s it going with Bing?” Jackie asked finally, unable to stand it any longer. Anti shrugged.
“Fine.”
Jackie took back what he’d just said about Anti’s few-word charm. This was terrible.
“Uh, great!”
Fine???? is that all you have to say??
Anti felt like punching through a wall, but he really didn’t want to be thrown out from yet another cafe. If he could just speak like a normal person, this wouldn’t be a problem!
The thing was… normally, he wouldn’t even care. He didn’t speak more than necessary and when he did he always hated it. But with Jackie here, in a pretty button-up shirt that did his chest all the favors and with that soft smile on his face, Anti wished he knew how to talk.
He wished he could make witty conversation and snappy replies like usual, but not even that was allowed, apparently. His mind was determined to sit sullen and quiet through this whole not-date.
Because it wasn’t a date. They were having a meeting. Even though he’d agonized over what jacket to wear all goddamn morning only to have to take it off as soon as he got to the cafe, warm from the sun and the rays of sheer goodness that radiated of Jackie.
Fuck, no, he was getting off track again. He looked up, playing with his coffee cup and looking it Jackie’s pumpkin spice with some curiosity.
“How’s that taste?” he asked, and immediately regretted in. Stupid, stupid, he should just stay quiet -
“Uh, it’s pretty good. Wanna try some?”
Anti blinked at the whipped-cream covered cup that was suddenly before him. There was a small dent in the mountain of cream where Jackie had already sipped. Slowly, hesitantly, he brought the cup to his lips in the same spot.
It was sweet and spicy and homely, and Anti pushed it back to Jackie quickly before he could start making sappy comparisons.
“Yeah, good. Hey, where do you think Marvin is?”
Fuck, fuck, today of all days to be late…
Marvin hurried as fast as they could down the streets, thankful they’d forgone the high heels for something a bit more practical. Their skirt swished around their legs as they finally stepped into the cafe, looking around before spotting their - coworkers. Yes. Because this was not a date, they reminded themself.
“Hi, darlings!” they chirped, leaning down to plant a kiss on each of their cheeks. It was loud and showy and perfectly in character. Not at all because they wanted a glimpse of that soft look in Anti’s eyes or Jackie’s bright blush.
“I, uh, got you a drink. Dirty chai, one shot.” Jackie mumbled, and Marvin couldn’t have helped the fond smile on their face if they tried.
“Thank you,” they said, sitting down on the unoccupied side, facing the window.
“How are you doing?” they barely waited for the mutually muttered response of “fine” before they kept talking, feeling the awkwardness creeping in as soon as they paused. “I’m doing grand myself, a lovely day, isn’t it? Now, what was it we were supposed to go over?”
Anti startled at that, diving into his bag for a second before coming up again, a concerned look on his face.
“I… forgot the agenda?”
Marvin sagged a little. Well, shit.
“Really?” They said, unable to keep the bite out of their tone. “You forgot?”
“Not like I chose to,” Anti bit back, arms crossed. “Do you think I want to postpone this?”
Marvin put their head in their hand and sighed.
“No, I know, just… Now we’ll have to get together another time.”
Anti grumbled, but got up, and Marvin felt their heart sink a bit. Damnit. They’d looked forward to this, even if it wasn’t a date. Sitting with Anti and Jackie, talking… maybe not just about work. Maybe playing some footsie under the table. They sighed. Oh well. Another time.
Jackie, who had been quiet up til now, muttered something under his breath.
“Hey… maybe… “ the rest was lost. Marvin looked to Anti, then back to Jackie.
“What did you say?” Anti said, half-way out of his seat. He sounded - accusing, for second, before he softened his voice just a tad. “didn’t quite hear ya there.”
Jackie looked up, looking between them.
“I just said… maybe we can just. Sit and talk, anyway? Not about work, just… talk?” His voice sounded so damn hopeful, smiling bravely. “I think that would be nice.”
Quiet fell over the three of them for a few seconds, and Jackie deflated slightly. “But… you’re busy, of course. I’ll - yeah.”
“No, not at all!” Marvin said, maybe too fast. Damnit, Jackie’s fucking puppy charm would be the death of them.
“Yeah,” Anti said, sitting down and surreptitiously stealing Jackie’s latte. “That could be real nice.” He smiled, slow and wide, and Marvin couldn’t help the giggle that escaped them. They felt like a schoolgirl, blushing at any sign of affection.
Looking between the two men at the table, staring starstruck at each other, they realized maybe they weren’t the only one who felt like that.
