#endthrive

[buildhope]

❝ i don’t think i know you at all. but i’d like to. ❞   /  @endthrive​.

mason doesn’t know him because alden never gave too much of himself away to the saviors at all.  and that wasn’t ever because he’s a closed off person  ---  he’s the very opposite,  in fact.  he loves to share his own stories and experiences and relate to others,  loves to get to know people on a deeper level rather than just survivor to survivor,  but that never felt like the place for it.   

the people there,  before they were given the title,  had taken him in at the worst time of his life,  just after he lost his brother and made decisions out of grief rather than logic  (  the very thing he’s always prided himself on doing.  )  they used that for their own advantage,  gave him hope when he needed it  ---  and he so blindly took it,  willing to give the place a chance simply because there was shelter  .  .  .    and because he didn’t know anything else.  he and his brother always dreamt of creating their own home  ---  seeing hilltop was the first chance that alden ever felt like that was possible. now that he’s here,  he is desperately trying to get back to the person he’s supposed to be  ---  the person he wants to be.  not someone who is closed off,  not someone who is afraid to be himself,  but someone who embraces it.  

he smiles at mason,  shoulders shrugging as he rests his hands on his hips.   ❝  wouldn’t say i know anyone back there,  not like i get the chance to know ‘em now.  different place,  different circumstances  .  .  .   i won’t let nothin’ that happened there define who we all get to be now,  y’know?  ❞    he doesn’t want any hostility with anyone.  he’s worked very hard to earl the trust of the people of hilltop,  clearing his name and becoming someone they all trust.   they trust him enough to be an ambassador between the communities and the sanctuary  ---  and though the latter is not something alden ever felt like he was fully a part of,  he’s willing to do it if it means more people from there get the same chance to start fresh,  just as he does.   

❝  i’d like ya to get to know who i am here.  ‘cause that’s the most real version of myself,  i’d say, ❞   he assures,  smiling back at him.    ❝  i’d sure like to get to know who you are,  too.  somethin’ tells me we could be real good friends.  ❞

[doomdays-a]

❝ did you want to be alone? ❞   /  @endthrive​​

her hair is untied and resting over her shoulders,  something rare for her,  usually an indication that she’s settled in for the day.  she pushes her hand through it and smiles with amusement at his words,  shaking her head.  ❝  spent enough time alone out there,  don’t you think?  ❞   she mutters,  turning to look at him and smiling.  that’s not true  ---  she’s had it well,  a large, sheltered home with power and unlimited resources,  always surrounded by people.  but she’s just as good at playing the role of the one who’s exhausted from her life on the road,  wandering to nowhere in specific,  no home to her name.  

she pats the space next to her on the bed,  insisting that he sit.  truthfully,  she did want to be alone,  so many thoughts she needed to get straight after a long day,  but turning him away isn’t an option.  and more than that,  she does appreciate his company,  despite how risky it is to be reuniting with someone who knew her way back then.  ❝  i was worried you were gettin’ sick of me already  ---  guess i’ve got some work to do,  ❞   she teases.   ❝  what’s goin’ on? ❞

[doomdays-a]

❝ i’ve missed our little talks. ❞   /   @endthrive

her fingertips lightly trail over taryn’s shoulder,  down her arm,  then back up again.  it’s as soothing for her as she hopes it is for taryn  ---  just simply being here,  being close,  not being alone.  a small smile tugs at her lips at her words,  and niylah sighs,  her fingertips now trailing up her arm and over to rest gently on her cheek.  ❝  i missed them too,  ❞   she whispers,  her eyes meeting hers in a soft gaze.  ❝  you have always been my favorite person to talk with,  you should know.   you should stay more often  ---  it could be good.  for both of us.  ❞

[doomdays-a]

❝ the only thing i know i’m still fighting for is…you. ❞   /   @endthrive​​

her stomach twists with the reminder that she likely doesn’t deserve that.  he should have let her go a long, long time ago  ---  and that’s exactly what she wanted back then.  but selfishly,  part of her always hoped he hadn’t,  because she hadn’t let him go,  even if she was the one who walked away.  who she is now isn’t the same person she was when she cowardly left him behind,  but that doesn’t mean she can’t still hold herself accountable.  it’s how she reminds herself to be better,  work harder  --- to be what the people she cares about deserves.  

and he has always deserved so much.  so much more than her.

❝  think you fought long enough.  more than you should’ve  .  .  .    for me,  ❞   she mumbles,  brow raised as she looks up at him.  the sight of coco resting peacefully in his arms is one that tugs at her heart in a way she never imagined she would feel again.  but something about it just feels right,  enough for a smile to tug at her lips.  

with a deep breath,  her eyes drift back to his,  and her lips purse together as she nods her head slowly.    ❝  no more fighting.  i’m here  ---  not going anywhere.   not this time.  i had too much to lose back then,  and  ---  way more to lose now.  ❞   he’s included in both scenarios;  the difference is that  she’s willing to fight for him this time,  too. 

[doomdays-a]

❝ you’re bleeding, let me have a look. here, hold still. ❞   /   @endthrive​

he groans,  his hand clutching his friend’s arm.    ❝   i feel okay----  it hurts,  but  .  .  .    i don’t want you to worry,  ❞   he insists,  most of his pain coming from exhaustion rather than the blow he took to his side,  now bleeding through his shirt.  ❝  i just want to get myself cleaned up before gracie sees.   i’m not afraid to tell her what it’s like out there  ---  doesn’t mean she has to see her old man covered in blood,  ❞   he notes,  attempting a soft chuckle,  but it inevitably comes with a grunt.  the wound is on his right side,  where he’s unable to reach due to his metal arm attached to the other,   leaving him to rely on ronin’s help more than anything right now.   ❝ it doesn’t feel too deep. ❞

[doomdays-a]

❝ look at me. i can’t imagine how you’re feeling, but you don’t have to go through it alone. ❞   /  @endthrive​​

she doesn’t take his prompt,  eyes focused on the wiring on the table in front of her instead,  having half the mind to simply ignore what he says and keep working.  it’s what she would normally do  ---  what she would certainly do if anyone other than him would’ve said the same thing  ---  but he’s not someone else.  it’s him,  someone she’s always found solace in,  always been able to relax with in a way that she can’t with others.  that’s both frustrating and relieving.

after a moment,  she lets her project fall from her hands back to the table,  frustration evident as she moves her hand up to swipe at her brow.   ❝  you do that to everyone?  ❞   she asks,  finally looking up at him and raising a brow.  ❝  bug them enough until they break?  ❞   she asks,  a hint of amusement in her eyes as she finally lets out a soft, somewhat forced laugh.  ❝  i’m fine,  mason.  i don’t know how many times i have to tell you that.  ❞   maybe until she believes it herself.   

[doomdays-a]

❝ for what it’s worth, i’m glad you’re coming with me. ❞   /  @endthrive​​

there’s something lingering on her tongue,  something she’s never really had to say before.  it’s only ever been a manipulation tactic,  a way to play some role and gain someone’s trust.  but with isaias,  it’s genuine  ---  and maybe that’s why it’s so much harder to actually say it.  she takes a deep breath,  head nodding once.   ❝  thank you,  ❞   she mutters,  looking up at him with an expression that is almost shy  ---  something rare for her,  but vulnerability has come easier with him than it ever has with anyone,  and she’s trying so hard to hold onto that.  ❝  - ---  for taking a chance on me,  i mean.   most people wouldn’t.  ❞

[doomdays-a]

❝ the war changed you. changed us both. we’re not kids anymore. ❞   /  @endthrive​​

she’s silent for a moment,  arms pressed against the railing as she leans over and looks out at her new view.  it’s temporary,  for however long this mission takes,  but she can’t deny it seems like a good place to be.  she can see why she’s been sent here  ---  yet the mission drifts far to the back of her mind when he brings up the past.  so much of her time is spent thinking about the future,  about how to get to where they need to and achieve the greater good,  that she barely ever thinks about the past anymore.  it’s why she forces herself to leave reminders  ---  the scar on her cheek,  the dog tags stuffed deep in her pocket.

she’s here now because of that  ---  because she made a choice that changed everything.  and ever since then,  it’s always been about this:  the world is destined for GOOD,  they just have to work for it.

❝  we weren’t even kids back then,  ❞   she mumbles,  raising a brow and turning to look at him.  ❝  shit changes fast and time don’t ever stop movin’ once you’re sent to war.  guess we never really stopped fighting even when we left,  huh?  ❞  though, now, it feels like she’s actively working towards something.   ❝  think it made me stronger.  made me focus.  made me figure out who the hell i wanted to be  ---  not who they were gonna try to make me be.  ain’t so bad.  here we are now.  thriving.  just wish i woulda found this place sooner.  found YOU sooner. ❞