approaching milford sounds.
i always wanted to see this beautiful place, called the 8th wonder of the world.
but i never thought i could really make it happen.
for a very long time in my life i spent so much money on things that there was none left for travelling. things are so easily available, they offer instant gratification. it always seemed easier and more reasonable to me to buy a little piece of happiness here and there instead of delaying gratification and saving up for travels. but the thing is: things never make you happy for long, they don’t fullfill you. their novelty wears off and you have to replace them with newer, shinier, more contemporary, more expensive things all the time to derive happiness from them. the more you buy, the more the marginal utility of things diminishes - and soon they become clutter, weighing you down.
in our expat years in california we were surrounded by new consumer opportunities and by so many shiny new things, so many new stores, cool brands, cheap clothes, sales and bargains...and i dived right in. knowing no one in this new country, the easiest way to become a part of it was to spend my free/alone time browsing through stores, going shopping. you never look/feel lonely in the mall. but you are. and you’ll stay lonely if this is all you do with your free time.
but california had so much more to offer: the beach, the golden hills, mountains and lakes, national parks, lively cities, festivals, concerts, an amazing food scene, a plethora of cool sport and leisure activities, and so many lovely people.
the newness of all this opened my eyes for this contradiction:
to have or to be - which one do you want to emphasize in your life?
i’m so glad the USA drew us in with its amazing landscapes, natural beauty and cool folks and made us hikers and campers, swimmers and snorkelers, runners and bikers, walkers and skaters, yogis and festival goers.
we enjoyed the beach and the parks and it dawned on us that money is better spent on experiences than on things.
i’ll never forget the roadtrips, daytrips and sometimes peaceful, sometimes exhilarating hikes (angel’s landing, baby!) over which i bonded with my husband, friends and family. our days at the beach and in the cities, just strolling through san francisco’s unique districs and soaking it all in, the amazing festivals and concerts (i still think of coachella, outside lands and the bridge school festival so, so often). i’ll always remember my days at the stanford and berkeley library where i researched for essays, and my english, spanish, swimming, bikram and hip hop classes. these experiences become a part of you. they don’t diminish with time and get scratches but live on in you, they shape you and let you grow.
this slowly but surely makes us shift our priorities, a journey that still continues, a road full of quantum leaps and setbacks that feels so right the more i conciously awaken to it :
we don’t need expensive stuff, we want to see the world and experience what it has to offer! we want to spend quality time with each other, with our loved ones and with the people we meet along our way.
so when we moved back to germany and mieke was on her way we decided to do what we always had dreamed of: take the opportunity to take two months of parental leave together and go see new zealand as a family of three.
we longed to have some cheerful summertime together amidst the cold german winter, to embrace the sun, the sea and nature and show mieke how beautiful this world really is. we yearned for some time together, away from the rush and stress of our daily hustle and bustle, to get into the groove as a new family, to grow closer together and make memories of the magic that dwells in this beginning. the beginning of our family.
we took advantage of this (maybe) once-in-a-lifetime opportunity to travel for two whole months to finally see this dreamland on the other side of the planet we thought we’d never see. NEW ZEALAND.
and all the negotiating, saving, planning and flying was so worth it!
we’ll never forget the amazing time we had as a new family in this wonderful country, all the sublime landscapes we explored together, the lovely people we met and the great time we spent with each other.
granted, this was a time consuming, CO2 heavy and expensive trip, and not everyone can afford this kind of travel. but the beautiful thing about experiences is:
the happiness you can derive from them isn’t as correlated to money as it is with things. it doesn’t have to get bigger, more expensive and cooler all the time to make you happy. there are so many free hiking trails or interesting cityscapes to marvel at in your surrounding, there are sports to play with friends, street musicians to listen to, intruments to be played, pictures to be painted ...you just have to open your eyes and embrace being instead of trying to fill the void or search for happiiness and well-being through having. this doesn’t seem to come as easy as just shopping happiness, but that’s the trick, this is true life. and it is so much more fullfilling!
