You see, i MISS you. but i understand that shit like this? shit that happened between us, it’s something that scarred me and nothing can’t ever be the same. The way you switched up SO EASILY, for someone else? For someone I KNOW that can’t ever be at the level of commitment, the level of REAL, that I was at. I prayed for every beautiful blessing to be sent your way. I still pray for that. I pray that one day, you’ll sit there and think about me, about how I was the realest thing you had in your unorganized life. God.. why did you have to go and fuck that shit up? We were fucking AMAZING together. You can’t ever deny that shit. I know that you feel it in your heart, your soul, your BLOOD how fucking amazing we were together. How much more amazing we both could’ve gotten together. I hate myself for missing you, i hate myself for still having love for you, i hate myself for ever having you running through my mind and controlling my damn dream sometimes. I’m ok at the moment. I know that I’m going to be ok. This is just a page that’s meant to be turned in everyone’s life, really. What I want to understand is why I still believe you were supposed to be the one to grow with me a couple of more months/years. But I know that’s something that I have to learn the next few months alone. I’ll always have you in my heart. I’ll always wish that you come right back into my arm, into my bed. It’s ok though. There’s something waiting for me down the line in my future. Maybe it’ll be another version of you, maybe it’ll be you. Whatever it is… I’m not in a rush to get there quite yet. I have things to experience, things to see, places to visit, people to speak to.