#fababies

[mirrorcowby]

yesterday’s prompt bc i was too lazy to post it last night

[mirrorcowby]

yesterday's prompt late entry again guys... homework is biting my ass. whatever.

family portrait with the fababies. (from left to right: barbara, quinn, rachel and beth!)

[possibilistfanfiction]

Do you have any head cannons for what happens to Spencer after she and Quinn break up? Also, your response to my retirement question was a-m-a-z-i-n-g. You are a Goddess of words. ❤️

oh spence. kid gets big, really, in her areas of study, which are (I wrote this mainly into headcanon to be as pretentious as possible but it fits) russian lit & applied physics. so yeah, spencer pursues physics academically at Harvard (by senior year at Yale she’s had enough of those lit majors…*cough cough quinn*) & she gets full funding at harvard for her phd to do some really, really cool physics stuff that I don’t know about hahaha.

but nah, I think she actually would go into something that deals very hands on with medical issues, something a bit closer to engineering than anything else, bc spencer is, at the end of the day, a total sap & was affected by quinn’s health issues to at least a small emotional extent, & so she does work with engineers & doctors on a lot of projects. & at some point she goes to eth for a year bc it’s just great & quinn would be a little jealous.

& spencer meets a gal & falls into a love that’s quite sustainable & healthy, & her gf is like. really patient & calm & functional lol. which ofc is quite helpful. but yeah they’re definitely nerds together.

spencer never has kids, & she doesn’t ever get married, although she stays with her gf for years & years. they travel quite a bit, & she gets grants & sabbaticals as often as possible, & she probably has tenure at a uni outside of the states (ahem, eth lol). & she’s pretty brilliant & does a lot of cool things that end up helping a ton of people.

& for as happy & stable as someone like spencer can be—she is those things. like quinn, but ofc in her own ways, the world doesn’t always fit for her quite properly, but she’s loved, & she’s helping people, & she’s not tied to one specific place, & so those things matter. those things get her through.

as for her relationship with quinn, they definitely stay friends, probably nerd out over email abt shit for their whole lives. when spencer is in new york, she always meets up with quinn & usually rachel, too, as they get older, bc spencer loves rachel bc of how good she is for quinn (“she puts up with your bullshit so brilliantly, fabray.” “berry-fabray.” “god I forgot how whipped you are.”)

& it’s interesting, too, bc spencer loves their kids. loves talking to them, bringing them stuff from when she travels, just hanging out, getting to hear their perspectives on the world. & she likes that they’re growing up in this open & healthy home, & she loves watching quinn be a mom. & there’s a teeny tiny part of her that wonders if she ever could’ve made it work, if she ever could’ve fit herself into the stylish brownstone, tenured, wife & kids life—bc she thought abt it—but then she always just ends up at the conclusion that she’s overwhelmingly happy quinn did rather than her lol.

& in the same way, ofc quinn loves to travel (not the actual getting there—she hates that—but once she’s at a place). & she goes to conferences & they take their kids on holiday & sometimes she & rachel just go somewhere for a weekend. but quinn has ties, unlike spencer, & sometimes she wonders if she could’ve been happy in a life like that. but then she looks at her wife & her babies (& yes, her very stylish brownstone that is, so seriously, home) & is just pumped that spencer gets to adventure enough for the both of them, bc she wouldn’t trade what she has for the world.

so at the end of the day they sort of joke with each other abt stuff like that too like “I swear to god quinn you’re so boring” or “do you even own more than four pairs of pants or do you just live out of that suitcase”

but they’re sweet, & once spencer gets stuck babysitting the kids when she’s there bc quinn gets sick (she was sick, she just didn’t tell spencer before she came to visit) & she & rachel go to the ER & leave spencer alone with ten year old nora & seven year old ollie, who just know her as aunt spencer, & by the time rachel trudges back with a v woozy & antibiotic-pumped quinn, spencer has built a huge blanket fort in the living room & the kids are absolutely enthralled at one of her stories. as is quinn, bc she’s had some pain meds & holy shit a blanket fort. rachel wants to be upset bc this whole thing is a mess & she starts filming a miniseries tomorrow, but quinn climbs into the fort so happily & spencer climbs out & just shrugs & tells rachel, “the small children were scared even though they’re annoyingly like quinn & act brave so. I’ll clean it up after they go to sleep if you want.” & rachel just shakes her head after a minute & gives spencer a hug & is like, “thank you.” spencer shrugs & they all end up back in the fort with hot chocolate, listening to spencer tell more stories. & then quinn falls asleep first & spencer tells them a bunch of embarrassing stories abt quinn when they were at yale (she always leaves out the bad parts, but there were some good parts too), & a few days later nora mentions one of them to quinn & quinn is just like “o h my god spencer” in an email. two weeks later spencer responds with “lol have fun with that.”

(gOD you obviously ask great questions bc they send me off on these weird little handcanon rambles)

[possibilistfanfiction]

Does Nora really struggle with food and do both Rachel and Quinn talk to her about it?

not constantly, no. but her junior year of high school, so she’s about sixteen, is a tough year. she’s always been thin—& like, she grew up with rachel & quinn, who are both, by any standards, thin. they’ve always had a healthy environment with food & exercise, though, in their house, & it’s not a place where they don’t talk about bad things, not at all (rachel might be dramatic about disappointments, & quinn might still shut down sometimes, but they always help each other balance that out).

but ofc, quinn & rachel, in some aspects, would be kind of difficult parents—not because of downfalls in their parenting, just bc they’re really successful people. & they are that successful bc they work hard, & their home life isn’t nearly as intense as their professional lives.

but her junior year, nora is studying for her SATs; she’s going through puberty; there’s probably a bit of passive aggressive ‘you can do anything you want to, baby, but you’re so smart & your mother & i both had a wonderful time in college.’ i do imagine that nora has always dreamed of going to yale, & she’s been in the best private schools in manhattan since she was three, & she’s gotten to learn from quinn at home, too, in terms of academia, & rachel in terms of anything to do with film, theater, stuff like that. (they always joke that it’s a miracle nora is so good at mathematics & science, even though ofc rachel & quinn excelled in school in general).

but yeah, junior year nora struggles a lot. it’s so much to handle at once—exams, dealing with friends, maybe a first boyfriend, wanting to not disappoint her moms, her body changing & developing. & so none of nora’s food issues are actually abt food; they’re abt having some control over a lot of scary things that seem very out of her control, & she’s not used to that. she talks, actually, to lucy—frannie & robert’s daughter—first, bc lucy has kind of always been like a big sister to nora. & nora feels bad bc she knows how much quinn struggled with food when she was younger, before she found a balance that worked for her. (by this point, nora knows pretty much everything—maybe not in detail, but everything—about those dark years of quinn’s, & she knows what’s lingered & what’s healed.

so she does end up talking to both quinn & rachel; at first she sits both of them down & v seriously tells them what’s been going on (mostly she’s been restricting & over-exercising more than anything). it makes both of her moms sad, but quinn is absolutely heartbroken, bc she’s worked so hard to create an environment where that never was supposed to happen. & after that first conversation—quinn is the one to cry, which almost never happens—nora talks to them both separately as well. she talks to rachel a lot abt what might help, & they go to therapy with nora sometimes too. rachel talks to her a lot abt body image, & how puberty was for her, & how she worked out an exercise routine that kept her healthy but balanced—bc nora has rachel’s body type, so all of that is helpful, & really does make nora feel more comfortable. & she talks to rachel abt pressure she puts on herself to be as good as rachel & quinn at something, & stuff like that.

& quinn is just absolutely heartbroken. so nora talks to her about how it’s not quinn’s fault—nora thinks their home is wonderful, which is why she told them as soon as she did. quinn probably does that sad thing where she cries for a few seconds & then composes herself disarmingly quickly, & nora knows that rachel will have to be there for quinn later—but quinn breaking down has never been something she’s done in front of either of her kids, so nora knows she’ll be okay. but she talks to quinn about how quinn got better, how she dealt with academic pressure, with going to school with whipsmart, brilliant, gorgeous women & not feeling inadequate & dysmorphic. & it’s hard, bc sometimes quinn still feels inadequate & dysmorphic, but she feels much less of that than she did when she was younger. mostly nora just promises quinn she’ll be honest, & that she’ll get better.

they go to therapy, they make food a fun experience together, & quinn teaches nora a bunch of really healthy meals & fall in love with the creation aspect of cooking. they don’t degrade eating disorders, & they talk about them seriously, but it’s not the center of their lives, either, which helps normalize food as well. they take nora out for a shopping trip once too, & blow like a bunch of money on clothes nora loves & feels comfortable in.

i imagine rachel very tenderly looks at quinn & then looks nora in the eye & says, ‘you’re a very pretty girl, nora, prettiest girl i’ve ever known, but you’re a lot more than that.’ & quinn probably has to leave the room so she won’t entirely lose it in front of nora. nora hears them later that night, though, when she goes to grab some water from the kitchen, bc her moms have shared a bottle of wine & she sees rachel just holding quinn & smoothing her hair, rubbing her back, as quinn just cries. & nora, in that moment, wants nothing more than to get better.

which she does, with help & just time, as well, to grow into her Self. by a year later she’s pretty good, & she gets into yale & graduates & all of that really great stuff.

(i’m sure nora’s close with one or two of her teachers, & the best card she gets at graduation is one that says get big, kid. go eat the world up. & she shows it so proudly to her moms, & later when she sees her moms crying that night, they’re smiling too. & it’s kind of all worth it, at the end of the day.)

[possibilistfanfiction]

hold me tight (& i'll sink in)

[just a little ficlet about nora being born, really fluffy, current universe, fababies]

...

hold me tight (& i'll sink in)

legions upon legions of craftsmen handmade my feelings/ for you —alt-j, 'hand-made'

It's not that you're a stranger to hospitals—in fact, you think you've spent quite a bit of time there for someone thirty-two years old, really; you're in and out every few months for checkups or from lingering complications from when you were seventeen, so by this point you even know which jello to avoid and where to direct Rachel to get the best coffee, even what position in a hospital bed is most comfortable.

What you're not familiar with is seeing Rachel in that hospital bed, seeing Rachel looking so small, squeezing your hand in pain. To be fair, Rachel has never been anything but dramatic and vocal, and she's had a fairly easy pregnancy, really—her show finished just at the beginning of her second trimester, so you didn't have to worry about her pushing too hard through the later stages of her pregnancy (even though she had been constantly bouncing with energy, decorating the nursery, going to prenatal yoga, birthing classes—dragging you along to as many as possible—and kept you working to satisfy her unpredictable, and strong, libido). 

It suddenly hits you, though, when she's whimpering through a contraction, and the doctor is getting ready to administer and epidural, how terrifying it is to see the love of your life—and you'd made those vows: partner, lover, best friend, wife—hooked up to machines, tubes and wires, being poked and prodded, and when Rachel squeezes her eyes shut as the doctor presses a needle into her spine, you have to fight back tears at the realization that Rachel deals with this so frequently with you, usually without too many tears or drama, at this point. She's strong—she's always been so strong—and this is just another thing to add to the list.

You'd gotten to the hospital in plenty of time—Santana and Megan had driven you, and once Rachel's contractions reached the point the doctor had designated, you immediately left, because Rachel was going to get there in time to, firstly, get an epidural, and secondly, not have your daughter on your fucking living room floor.

It's all quite overwhelming, and it's been five hours so now there are quite a few people trying to pack into Rachel's room—her dads, your mom and your stepdad, Frannie and Robert, Santana and Megan, Kurt. You're getting protective and you feel a wave of tired bitchiness coming on—you'd gotten to the hospital at around nine at night, so it's the middle of the night—coupled with the fact that you're watching your wife in pain, but then Rachel seems to relax, the contraction ending, the epidural helping. She seems to understand whatever predictably stony facial expression you're making and laughs lightly, squeezes your hand gently. "Hey baby, you do realize this is a really, really happy day, right?"

You can't help but smile, brush aside her tangled hair and kiss her sweaty forehead.

"It's all going to be okay," she reassures you, and you feel like an idiot—most of the time you're pretty good with words, with treating situations intelligently by this point, by rationing through your emotions in a healthy way, but this is your wife and your child, and nothing about how much you love them is anything but completely all-encompassing.

"I know," you say, even though there are so many things that could go wrong; really, all you can seem to think is I can't lose them. 

Another contraction hits, and a nurse ushers everyone but you out of the room because Rachel is almost fully dilated, but Rachel is in much less pain now, and you hold her hand and hum some old song you'd adored during college, just because it pops into your head and seems to lilt gently. 

"You're beautiful," you say quietly.

She shakes her head. "I'm kind of gross right now, honey."

"No. You're so beautiful."

She leans up slightly and presses a kiss to your lips. "Still the prettiest girl I've ever met," she tells you.

And then your OBGYN comes in and tells Rachel that it's time to push. You're pretty sure that breathing doesn't actually help, because Rachel keeps saying, "Fuck you, Quinn," loudly, but you indulge her and work on your breathing techniques. You don't look because a relatively large being is coming out of one of your favorite body parts in the whole world and you already know you don't particularly want that visual stuck in your mind, and Rachel pushes a few times and then—it seems to stop time, to warp it in some sense—there's a tiny, screaming baby in the doctor's arms, being ushered over to a scale, and Rachel is crying, and you kiss her and it's a girl—theoretically you have some issues with instilling binary gender at birth, but you're so strikingly happy in that moment they don't really cross your mind—and then your daughter is in Rachel's arms.

"Hey Nora," Rachel says, and it's definitely the most beautiful thing you've ever seen by a long shot when Rachel looks up at you and smiles holding your daughter. "This is your mom, Quinn," she says, sort of tilting Nora in your direction—Nora, who looks particularly disgruntled about having to be born, which for years will make you laugh fondly at completely random moments. "And I'm your mom, too, Rachel. I suppose we'll work out less confusing names later, but don't worry, sweetheart."

You can't seem to say anything—you're in a moment of ineffable wonder, maybe more than you've ever felt before. 

"Baby?" Rachel checks with a little smile. "Do you want to hold her?"

You nod, frantically say, "Yeah. Yes, yeah."

Rachel laughs fully. "I don't know if you're sure about that one."

"Fuck you, sweetheart." you mumble, and Rachel gasps, scandalized.

"Language, Quinn," she chastises, but then she hands you Nora carefully.

"Hi, little thing," you say when your heart wrenches at the tiny bit of weight nestled in your arms.

She peeks her baby-gray eyes open at you, then closes them again, her nose scrunching. 

"God,' you breathe, and then look up at Rachel, who is exhaustedly smiling, crying.

You start to cry, too, when Nora starts crying—loudly—and you look down at her angry, red face, and say, "Wonder who you got that set of lungs from, huh?"

Rachel leans back on the bed and you climb in with her and the baby. All three of you are crying at this point, and you and Rachel laugh and you kiss her.

"I don't know," she says, looking between you and Nora. "She's going to give you a run for your money in the prettiest-girl-in-the-world department."

You kiss Nora's tiny, tiny forehead, and you nod. "In the more-than-that department too, probably."

Rachel grins, kisses the side of your head. "I bet she got your brains. And look at that perfect little nose."

You shake your head fondly—Nora isn't at all genetically yours, after all, but upon Rachel's insistence you'd picked a donor with blonde hair and green eyes who had an MBA from Wharton—and just shrug. "I just—I don't even know what to say."

"Me either," Rachel says.

"Both of us speechless—who would've ever thought?"

She laughs and then yawns, snuggles into you a bit more. "Should we let all of our family come see her now?"

"I suppose if we have to," you say, but you're so excited to show off this gorgeous life in your arms.

"And maybe sleep," Rachel says.

"That's probably a good idea," you mumble, and you hand Nora to a gushing Hiram and a crying Leroy and Judy a few minutes later, listen to Santana's she's not as hideous as I was expecting followed by Megan's delighted scoff, watch Frannie and Robert hold her perfectly, hear Kurt say, "We'll have you in baby Dior just as soon as we're out of here."

It's bright and sort of chaotic, but you fall asleep easier than you'd imagined, because your daughter is already surrounded by so many people who adore her, and your wife is asleep at your side, and your whole family, in that moment, is healthy and safe.

[closetcasefranchaela]

now i'm thinking about pregnant rachel and omg her little waddle and crying over a pint of vegan avocado ice cream while watching a movie she's seen 1,000 times and quinn rushing around the upper west side to make sure the apartment is fully stocked with rachel's comfort foods and heating pads and bath soaps and lotions.

and omg a sleepy pregnant rachel like rolling over a little bit in bed and kinda poking part of her belly like "hey lil baby," and quinn sleepily being like, "hey." and rachel laughing, 'no, i meant baby-baby. elbowing me in the bladder at the moment." and quinn leaning down and saying, "stop being mean to mommy. she already pees five times a night," kissing her tummy. "definitely takes after you. pretty sure there are some serious cheer routines going on in there." and quinn just holds rachel, pressing lightly against her and feeling the baby moving around a little bit, but calming down eventually, as if snuggled between the two of them.

[closetcasefranchaela]

more drabbles of things that scare future!faberry.

health scare: when they're in their late twenties and are engaged and thinking about their future, saving for a bigger apartment (they're renting a better apartment, but they want a multiple bedroom--though they haven't had a long conversation about kids yet).

one night, rachel comes home early from rehearsal, pale and in pain. she thought it was period cramps, but the pain is getting worse. quinn offers to take her to the hospital, but rachel says she'll take an ibuprofen and try and sleep it off. but later, rachel is in immense pain and quinn rushes them to the hospital. the doctors allow quinn to go in with rachel, and she holds her hand as the doctor does a brief examination. the doctor believes it's likely an ovarian cyst, and an ultrasound would help. and quinn can only squeeze rachel's hand when rachel asks in this terrified voice, "is... will i be okay?" and the doctor explains that cysts are common for women their age and an ultrasound would verify if it were a potential threat of cancer. and quinn tries to hide the fact that she's panicking because it was never supposed to be rachel getting hurt because rachel has survived so much and this is their beginning and it's not supposed to be so hard for them. quinn has to wipe away her tears when rachel's voice cracks when she asks, "will... will this affect my fertility?" and the doctor can only respond, "it depends on what kind of cyst..." and quinn hates that the doctor can't make any promises, so she just kisses the back of rachel's hand as if to say, "i just need you to be okay and we'll figure out the rest."

despite the ultrasound technician's gentle touch, rachel still winces. she's not sure if it's because of the pain or if it's because this wasn't how she imagined her first ultrasound with quinn holding her hand. the ultrasound technician turns the screen to show them both. the doctor points to the dark spots, indicating that rachel had a blood cyst burst, causing the intense pain, but with some mild pain medication and rest, no surgery will be needed and she'll be just fine. the doctor recommends that rachel go on birth control to reduce a recurrence, and when rachel's face falls at this, the doctor adds, "but this is mostly just to balance out the hormones and keep an eye on it for a bit. it's not permanent. if you plan on having kids, this won't be a concern at all. you should be more worried about the lack of sleep that comes after you give birth," and she gives them a supportive smile and both rachel and quinn are trying not to cry.

later when they're at home, rachel feels better because the pain has lessened and she knows it's nonthreatening, she feels quinn crawl into bed beside her. and rachel sort of turns to her in the dark, but she can make out the concern on quinn's face. "i feel okay," she says, running her hand across quinn's face to brush the hair from her eyes and smooth the frown from her face, kissing her between the eyebrows. and she adds, "i know we're mostly focused on the wedding, but... i was scared because i want... i mean, do you...?" and quinn, despite all her fears of being a parent and never wanting to be anything like her own, just nods with tears in her eyes--the sad and the hopeful kind of tears--because she only loves best with rachel and that means she would have no other future than one where she could share that love with rachel and a family of their own. so she whispers, "more than anything. i'm scared... but if i'm going to be brave at all in my life, it will always be for you. for us." and she just kisses rachel so softly and they just breathe and exist for a moment together and they realize how important it is that they are alive at the same time, that they met, survived the difficult beginnings, and fell in love and keep falling in a much more graceful fashion for and into one another. so quinn scoots down the bed a bit and kisses the middle of rachel's chest, where her heart is beating so assuringly, then with a feather light graze of her lips, kisses just below rachel's bellybutton, like a promise.

[closetcasefranchaela]

Part 1 of 3? 4? of what possibilistfanfiction and I talk about when we’re sleepy lil things.