Rabid, No Rabies - Whaaaat? + My First Tale
Heyoooo. I thought I'd post an explanation of this blog title - "Rabid, No Rabies." It means having fanatical tendencies without actually having any of the truly negative side effects. In the spirit of rabidity, let me explain to you my current situation of fanatical, obsessive, going-to-extreme-lengths-to-pursue-something behavior.
I have this banker - he's the guy who helped me open my IRA because I have no concept of money saving technique or budgeting and have to stash my money away - who is pretty cute and around my age. I go to the same bank branch because of the proximity to my house, makes sense, right? Anyway, so he and I chat whenever I go to the bank, whether brief or lengthy, and I'd always had slight feelings of attraction to him. This was a healthy relationship of flirtiness and personal chit chat while in a professional environment.
Two weeks ago, I went to the bank because I wanted to get a credit card from them, so naturally William* faciliates the application process with me. While he was entering all my information, he randomly asks, "Do you like sushi?" and I am 100% surprised because how is this relevant at all? I say yes and he mentions how he recently went to a place in ___ and I agree and say something like yeah that place is good, etc etc. Random. Anyway, I get approved and so he has me sit in his chair so he can show me the online banking site (as if I don't already access it?) and is scrolling through the gift card reward vendors when we arrive at Williams Sonoma. William mentions something like, "That place is so cool," and I inform him that when I get married, my mother is going to buy my a set of pots and pans from there, to which he replies, "oh man, I should propose right now." Flirty right? Anyway, so we finish up and he offers to shake my hand, okay whatever, this is professional, but OH MY GOD did he just joke about proposing to me??
I start to develop obsessive thoughts about him and thus begins my middle school crush on him. [Tangent to summarize the result of my last crush - he was a law student and we had a mutual friend, we flirted a little, and I had a huge crush on him. Eventually I gave up and came to terms with the fact that nothing would progress from holding hands while drunk. Then, we go out for a holiday on a particular Tuesday before Easter and eventually he comes home with me. I was a surprised, happy girl.] So my newly escalated crush on William was surprising and fraught with what I consider rabidity. On the Monday following my last credit card application interaction with him, I casually went on a run near the bank, coincidentally a little after they closed. Pretty sure he was in his car as I strode by confidently in my super cute Lulu tank and running shorts. The next day, I went to the gym and stopped by the grocery store afterwards when whose car did I truly coincidentally park next to? William's. He rolled down his window and we chatted. Post-chat, I started walking away, wearing my tight running tights and looking gym cute. He better have been checking out my behind.
Retrospectively, I should've asked him out then, outside of the professional environment of the bank, and coincidentally bumping into each other. Oh well, that's the past now. Onto this week's incidents - keep in mind, my crush is in full bloom and there is no way it's leaving unless some sort of action is implemented. This past Monday, I actually had to go to the bank to deposit some money I received on Sunday. I confidently walk into the bank and William greets me, except he's working with another (hot) customer. Shucks. I deposit my money and on my way out, he says good bye, nice to see you, etc. I am positively infatuated. I think about him the rest of the day and of course, find a way to need to visit the bank the next day. (Side note: A friend's [he used to be on my marriage list] mom is legitimately one of my friends and I saw her on Monday evening and she convinced me that William is professionally flirting with me, it's more than customer service, etc. She tells me I need to ask him out, because he can't put a customer in that sort of situation. This is a fact I've already realized, but I am too shy to actually ask someone out.) Sooo I go to the bank on Tuesday, with the full intention of asking him out. My plan: go in, deposit the money, go to this desk and sit down to chat, then ask him to get a drink. Of course my plan was thwarted when I turn around from the counter and he's walking over to me/the counter/my general area and he asks what else I'm doing today, so we chat and then I leave.
Shit, so another lost opportunity to ask him out. I panic because I chickened out so I call up my girls and they all agree I absolutely need to ask him out. I muster up the courage to call the bank and just my luck, he's on a conference call. He returns my call three hours later (what??) and leaves a generic voicemail. I don't return it because I'm unhappy with the voicemail.
Okay so I went out last night with a girlfriend and we decided I need to ask him out. Absolutely. SO today I call him because oh, I coincidentally have more bank business. He facilitated a transfer and then asked, "What else do you have?" and then I ASKED HIM. "Would you want to get a drink sometime?" Like the smoothest person, he replies, "of course, when?" I AM FLOORED. What? Like, wait he just said yes? HUH? We decided on a date, time, and location. COOL SO SO ABSOLUTELY WONDERFUL I AM IN HEAVEN, HOLY SHIT I JUST ASKED A GUY OUT WHAAAT. We hang up and I am literally tearing up from joy. DID THAT JUST HAPPEN?
Nothing can ruin my day. Oh, except three hours later, a girlfriend-sleuth finds his Facebook and whaddya know? HE HAS A GIRLFRIEND. More on this later... stay tuned. Hope you're deeply interested now!