So I have 2 snakes and one of them is shedding rn and it’s SO LOUD and all I can think about is Gundham having a snake in his bedroom and originally Kaz teased him mercilessly with all the snake/penis comparison jokes he could think of, but then he and Kaz sleep together and Gundham’s already fallen asleep but Kaz is wide-eyed and mortified cuz the snake is SO FUCKING LOUD HE CAN’T SLEEP WHAT THE FUCK SNAKES ARE SUPPOSED TO BE QUIET but nope, the Python’s skin shedding sounds like someone crinkling an empty water bottle and it goes on for like TWO HOURS and Kaz gets ZERO SLEEP cuz he spends the rest of the night thinking about it. So anyway... I’ve taken a lot of melatonin tonight I apologize
HI I ALSO DID NOT REALIZE SNAKES SHEDDING MADE NOISE WTF
Sodas just like super relaxed and sleepy, cuddled up next to Gundham and on the verge of falling asleep when he hears a weird crinkling noise and it kind of startles him back awake. He’s super confused but eventually figures out it’s coming from Gundham’s snake’s enclosure.
He wakes Gundham up cus he’s worried something might be wrong with the snake, but Gundham just tells him it’s shedding and then wraps his arms around Soda and goes back to sleep.
Soda just lays there, wide eyed and listening to the weirdly loud noise of a snake shedding its skin while his apparently unbothered boyfriend sleeps away on his chest, and questions everything he ever knew. Snakes aren’t quiet, what else is a lie? Is the sky really blue? Does the ocean even exist? Is he actually living in a video game?
Gundham wakes up the next day to a very over-tired Soda having an existential crisis and makes a mental note to move his snake to a different room lol
Hey it’s angst o’clock: before Kaz and Gundham get together, when they still kinda hate each other, 2 of the Devas have babies and everyone takes turns babysitting the litter while Gundham works. Kaz’s turn comes and he finds one of the babies has died and fREAKS THE FUCK OUT. Like sobbing cuz he’s never had a pet before let alone seen one die and so he takes the baby and flees and everyone thinks he just straight up stole a baby but really he’s fucking horrified and terrified to tell Gundham cuz he fucked it up and the baby is dead cuz of him somehow. And someone, maybe Sonia, finds him and talks him down and they go to Gundham who is more upset that Kaz “stole” a baby but once he realizes what happens he understands. Being a Breeder he probably sees animal death a lot unfortunately. But he helps comfort Kaz and forgives him and lets him help with the living babies and maybe that’s how they start becoming actual friends and sometime down the line they realize oh fuck I’m actually in love with this dude when did that happen IDK SHOWER THOUGHTS WOULDNT LEAVE ME ALONE I HAD TO TELL SOMEONE SORRY
You think you can come onto my blog and just rip my fucking heart out, huh? Right in front of my mutuals? You think you can just rip my heart out and force me to write something sad so everyone else has to feel sad too?
Good. Cus you 100% can lol.
TW: animal death - It’s mentioned repeatedly and is the central theme of this, so please just skip this one if you think you might be uncomfortable reading it.
Gundham comes into the class one day and he’s super proud and showing off the baby hamsters to everyone. He’s a little embarrassed to ask for help, but he’s working on a very important conservation project or something, so he asks if anyone would be willing to keep an eye on them for an hour or two at a time over the next few days, insisting that it wouldn’t be hard, all they really had to do was make sure they didn’t escape and call Gundham if something went wrong. At least like half the class offers cus the babies are just so damn cute, Soda only offers cus Sonia did and he’s trying to impress her.
Gundham sets up an enclosure for the hamsters in the classroom, and everyone picks a time to come by to watch them.
When Soda’s turn rolls around a few days later, he’s secretly a little excited. He’s been complaining about it the past few days to keep up appearances, can’t have anyone suspecting that even tough he can’t stand Gundham, he also kind of has a soft spot for him (What? Dudes handsome), but he’s actually pretty psyched to get to spend some time just chilling with the baby hamsters. He’s never had his own pet, but he’s always wanted one.
Anyways, when he gets to the class he checks on all the babies and as far as he can tell they’re all good. He gives pets them for a bit, but then they seem like they’re trying to go to sleep so he leaves them and sits at a desk to play around on his phone for a while. Like 40 minutes later he gets up to check on them again.
They’re pretty much all huddled up, and Soda thinks it’s super cute, but he notices one lying down a bit away from the rest. He assumes it must have rolled away in it’s sleep, or that it got kicked out since its the smallest one, so he goes to move it back over to the hamster pile.
It’s cold when he touches it.
He knows pretty much right away what that means, but he doesn’t want to believe it. He pokes it a bit and tries to scratch it’s whiskers to get it to react, but it doesn’t move. He’s already crying, but then he starts thinkin about how it was probably something on his hands that killed it. He didn’t was his hands after finishing up in his garage, and he must have had oil or something on his hand when he was petting the hamster and now it was dead.
He’s hyperventilating.
He’s worried he killed them all, but looking at the hamster pile, the rest of them all appear to be breathing still. He’s too scared to touch them to make sure.
He’s sure its his fault. His fault for touching the hamster with dirty hands and his fault for not paying more attention. The hamster was probably acting weird before it died, if he had just been paying attention he could have called Gundham and it would still be alive.
He’s a murderer.
Sonia was supposed to be the next person watching the hamsters. He couldn’t let her see the dead baby hamster, couldn’t let her know he killed it. He looks around the room and finds a little box to put it in. He’s chocking on his sobs as he picks up the hamster, and he nearly drops it because his hands are shaking so bad. Once it’s in the box he has to take a moment cus he thinks he might vomit from how guilty he feels.
There’s like 10 minutes before Sonia is supposed to get there, so he takes one last look at the other hamsters, picks up the little box that has no right feeling as heavy as it does, and leaves.
He doesn’t really know where to go so he just heads up to the roof to get some fresh air and think, sobbing the whole way. He’s pretty sure he saw Sonia down one of the hells on his way up, but he just prays she didn’t see him and that she doesn’t remember how many hamsters there were.
He sits with the box in his lap, shaking.
He thinks he feels it shift.
His chest seizes up. Was it alive? Had he really not killed it? He can feel the hope swelling up inside him as he slowly opens the box-
It’s dead.
It’s definitely dead and now its lying on its side and its little eyes are staring right at Soda and it takes him a minute to realize his sobs have turned into screams of agony. The hope made it so much worse.
He closes the box again and sets it down so gently beside him, before curling in on himself and just sobbing and screaming into his hands so hard his whole body is shaking from it.
He’s a murderer. He killed a defenseless animal. A baby. It was only a few days old and he killed it.
Suddenly there’s a warm hand on his back, rubbing just a little and bringing him back down to earth. His sobs slowly get weaker and he manages to look up, though his vision is still blurred with tears. He can make out dark clothes, pale skin, and a bright purple scarf. He assumes Gundham is there to punish him.
Gundham just asks him what’s going on, says Sonia called him because one of the hamsters was missing and she thought she had seen Soda running away from the classroom earlier. They assumed he had taken one of the hamsters for himself, but that didn’t explain why he was crying on the roof.
Soda realizes that the only reason Gundham isn’t beating him senseless is because he doesn’t know the hamster is dead.
“I killed it.” He starts sobbing harder the second the word leave his mouth. He feels Gundham’s hand tense on his back
“What.” Gundham definitely sounds pissed now. He’s not yelling, but his voice sounds deadly. Soda accepts that he’s about to get the shit kicked out of him, accepts it even. He deserves it.
“I-it must have been the oil on my h-hands or something, I don’t know. I s-should have been paying more attention, but when I looked at them gain it was-” his voice is cut off by another sob, and he’s just waiting for Gundham to hit him. To his surprise, some of the tension in Gundham’s body dissipates.
“Where is the poor creature?” Gundham doesn’t sound angry anymore and Soda doesn’t understand. He just gestures towards the box, he’s too much of a coward to even look at it again.
Gundham gets up and opens the box. Soda hear him exhale sadly after a moment, before returning to Soda.
“It would seem we have both been mislead.” Gundham sits beside Soda and starts rubbing his back again. He explains that Soda did not kill the hamster, it seemed like something must not have developed right internally, and it simply died of natural causes. There was nothing either of them could have done to save it. Soda is just amazed how calm Gundham is being.
He asks him why he isn’t more upset, and Gundham sighs and tells him that it’s unfortunately something he sees a lot, so over time he’s just gotten used to it.
Soda’s just like “That fucking sucks.” and Gundham kind of laughs sadly and say “It fucking sucks indeed.” Soda’s kind of startled by Gundham swearing and it forces an awkward little laugh out of him.
They’re both quite for a while, then Gundham tells him he’s touched by how upset Soda was over the hamsters death, and that he’s sure the hamsters soul appreciated him mourning it, but it is simply part of the circle of life and death, so he shouldn’t get too fixated on it. Soda’s still crying a little but he nods and says he’ll try, Gundham keeps rubbing his back.
They stay up on the roof for a while longer. Soda has mostly stopped crying, but Gundham’s hand is still on his back and he tries not to think too much about it. When they stand, Gundham picks up the box before Soda can even think about it and motions for him to follow him.
They bury it in some nearby woods, Soda insists on leaving some flowers. He asks Gundham not to tell their classmate about how much he cried. Gundham just says ‘of course’, as if they didn’t spend most their free time looking for new ways to get under each other’s skin.
Later, Gundham insists that Soda comes to see the healthy babies, telling him it will help him feel better. Soda is scared to be left alone with them, so Gundham just stays by his side the whole time. Even after Gundham finishes his project and brings them back to his place, he invites Soda over to see them. He starts teaching Soda about proper hamster care and they slowly grow closer and closer.
Sometimes Soda gets a little teary eyed while looking at the other hamsters, and he’s worried Gundham will make fun of him. He never does, he always just silently rubs Soda’s back, until one day he pulls him into a hug as well.
Months later, their relationship has completely turned around. They’re both constantly talking to each other and hanging out, they even occasionally refer to the hamster babies as their children haha. The rest of the class starts making bets on when they’ll realize they’re into each other, but for the time being they’re both happy they were able to finally become friends.
Ok I feel kinda bad about dropping that angst on y’all lol so... Pokémon!AU? The Devas are all mouse-esque Pokémon of some kind lol Kazuichi has all steel types except for like one electric maybe? Bonus if it came from Gundham
(The angst for those who want it)
Disclaimer: I didn’t even try to make balanced teams lol they’re just based on type and aesthetic
Gundham’s Team:
Gundham is a Breeder this is just a sampling of some of his favs haha. His battle team would be all dark types cus of who he is. Most of his pokemon are based on irl animals, but he also has a couple that represent more occult/magical things.
He definitly has pretty much every one of the mouse/rat/hamster etc pokemon, but Morpeko is a favorite cus 1. typing and 2. it was a gift from Soda haha.
Gundham isn’t huge into battling, but occasionally Soda will ask him to be his partner for a double battle or something and they both get really into it haha
(Realizing he would 100% have a greninja but I’m too lazy to go back and change it oops)
Soda’s Team:
(Yes I gave him a shiny Weavile based solely on the colors lol)
Soda is a lot less strict about the typing of his pokemon, but he does have a preference for steel and electric type pokemon cus they can help him around his garage. He caught Togedemaru as another gift for Gundham, since Gundham loves little rodent pokemon, but it ended up bonding with Soda and Gundham refused to take it because of that haha.
I’m also imagining the Morgrem being the offspring of Gundham’s Grimmsnarl. Soda found the egg hidden somewhere around Gundham’s place, and it hatched while he was bringing it to him haha. Soda jokingly calls it his and Gundham’s son, and he’s super attached to it because it was the first pokemon he ever actually helped hatch himself lol.
They live together at a pokemon daycare that Gundham’s family has been running for years, and they met when Soda showed up to deal with some mechanical issues caused by a super rowdy electabuzz haha
Soda is a mechanic, but he dreams about being a gym leader one day and Gundham 100% supports him in that. Soda has all kinds of blueprints for what he’d want his gym to look like, but he also has a secret blueprint for a special steel/dark type gym with space for 2 leaders lol (He shyly shows it to Gundham one day, telling him that he want’s to share everything in his life with him, then he gets down on one knee and proposes🤗)
Jesus H. Christ now I can just picture Kaz surrounded by the husks of vibrators and little motors on the floor just tinkering away making something that has NOTHING to do with sexy times and Gundham walks in like..... what the fuck are you dOING
This isn’t even that nsfw but just in case
Gundham wakes up in the middle of the night and follows a trail of broken vibrator bits and empty energy drinks to Soda’s garage lol. Soda is sitting in the dark building some unidentifiable monstrosity and Gundham just shakes his head and asks him what the hell he’s making at 4 in the morning.
Soda turns and is like 80% unhinged and just says “Art.”
Gundham sighs and drags him back to bed, assuring him his art can wait for the morning. Soda yells that he’s stifling his creativity but goes anyways lol
In the morning Soda has no idea what he was making and he’s upset that he ruined all his vibrator lol
Gundham’s ringtone in Kazuichi’s phone is the Hamster Dance song. I don’t know why but I woke up this morning with it stuck in my head and now the idea won’t leave me alone. Gundham hates it.
You are trying very hard to awaken repressed elementary school memories, Becky, and I don’t appreciate it 😤
lol but your totally right, especially when they’re still doing their whole rivalry thing haha
Soda just runs into class one day and tells Gundham to call him. He refuses at first but when he eventually does ,the whole room is just filled with the song and Soda is howling with laughter lol Gundham is ready to murder Soda and Sonia nearly lets him
I’m sorry and I’m not sorry. It’s always angst o’clock lol
lol it’s okay, I said it in the tags but I was already feeling kind of sad and it was kind of therapeutic to write 😊, so feel free to just be “not sorry” haha
