Deep sadness left me in a state of great depression. Simple things became chores requiring more energy than I could seem to muster. Couldn't sleep, though exhausted. Never would my mind stop grinding its gears. Then of course, waking up and getting out of bed. All purpose and reason for living seemed to have left as quickly as the bullet that slammed into her skull. Getting out of bed was crappy, because then you have to mingle with countless people who look and whisper your tragedy to the person next to them, as if that would help them understand my desire for isolation, immobility, and deep melancholical silence...I could always see the pathetic attempt of pity and sympathy on their faces, they new nothing of empathy. No one had had to walk in the shoes I did at that age, therefore. relating to my tragedy was something they could never do, and something I needed someone to be able to do. My days , as well as my nights, were the most miserable moments imaginable. A time when tragedy brutally stole my childhood and ghosted me out of the age of innocence....I tried to connect to that sad, miserable child decades later...this piece was the result of that connection....
An afterword about "FallenOne Style"....I have fun in the doing of a piece. The creativity, uniqueness, of my writing is something that enjoy exploring. Early, I found I hsdca fascination with taking innocent little nursery rhymes. And then twisting them, wearing them. I would deliver an adaptive hybrid taken and infused with the dark emotions I needed to release, express...empty from the seemingly, bottomless depths of my souls vessel. I only do maybe one for every twenty I write, but I alwsyd enjoy each and everytime that I get to take something from a child memory and twist it into something deep, dark, and never conceived or attempted by any other poet to my knowledge. And though the emotions and feelings of each piece seem to often make my works appear to be a miserable choir for my soul to create, know, that it is in the weaving of these works, that I often find my greatest pleasures as a writer. The style, the form, the flow. Yes.....I like these things the most.