( * kyungsoo sits alone, surveying the melancholy faces of passersby with wide, attentive eyes that blink from beneath the shadows cast by his hood. bandaged fingers clench, unclench. the toe of one sneaker picks aimlessly at a long, looping crack, the split slithering through the concrete in a vaguely serpentine shape. kyungsoo has become a live hand grenade, ready to tick tick boom if he doesn’t find who he’s looking for soon. very soon. nervous energy morphs into adrenaline within his veins, his heart icy and brittle with bountiful worry, seething rage. there’s simply not much he can do other than to keep on searching, holding onto hopes for that familiar face to suddenly appear somewhere in these swarms of festival-goers flitting around from booth to booth. before, he might’ve been feeling defeated. lost. alone. scared. when this lantern festival concludes, he doesn’t even know where he’ll be sleeping tonight. but there just… just isn’t anything left in him. no — no, that wasn’t quite it, though. something was left, no matter how faint it might be. and as the minutes tick by, he feels it glowing brighter, hotter, like a yellow-orange candle flame flickering low in his belly. the old kyungsoo has peeled away, leaving behind a stranger that somehow barely looks even slightly familiar in the mirror. it’s not a bad feeling though, not really. but maybe that’s just because he’s gone past the point of worry about everything and anything. )
( * the iron bench has grown hard and cold beneath his bottom, making his back, with muscles already knotted and tight with tension, even stiffer. back to wandering around, i suppose. he straightens slowly and smooths out the wrinkles that crease his jeans, keeping his hood pulled down low over his face all the while. after all these years of trying so hard not to be seen by others, he’s grown quite adept at making himself disappear; it almost feels like everything is normal again as he allows himself to be moved by the flow of the crowd, hands shoved deep into his pockets. he should be frugal with his measly amount of cash [since there’s not enough to survive on to begin with], but the boy finds that his lips have grown a bit chapped by the salty brine, mouth dry and throat parched — so he diverges from the path, head craning side to side as he looks for that slushie stand he’d spied a half hour ago. )
( * kyungsoo doesn’t cry out when a body suddenly collides with his own, their limbs tangling together in a messy, heap — although he does utter a soft groan when his right shoulder connects with the pavement, the position he’s found himself in putting a painful amount of strain on the rows of sutures that keep his side stitched closed. his head clears quickly, arms and legs gone still beneath whoever pins him — the witnesses of the accident, a few girls, giggle before passing by. kyungsoo blinks away the surprise, eyes finally focusing on whoever has run into him. but it’s his reaction — so calm and collected despite being trapped beneath a total stranger — that truly surprises him. )
( * a quiet, somewhat tight laugh bubbles out of him. he tries to pull an arm free; when he concludes that it’s firmly planted beneath the other boy’s knee, kyungsoo simply lies still. ) hi there… couldn’t… resist putting your hands on me, huh…? ( * he manages to say, still a fair bit winded after having the air knocked from his lungs. a small smile twitches at the corners of his lips, unsure of whether it wants to be there or not. ) mind getting… off of me? can’t really breathe…
daraaaaaa hey dara, so what do you think about luhan thinking you're cute, huh huh see, i told you i know these things. >: i don't know why you never listen to me it's actually quite upsetting ( i think ) why did i just talk in parentheses. i'm actually proud you got him the chapstick like i told you though hey do you miss me yet i bet you do --
huh? [/ she turns around, and in that instant she regrets it, because it’s him. she’s been through this way too many times for her not to know it’s bjoo, especially since these weird encounters are always paired with his unique speech pattern; always rambling on about things that made sense but none all at once. ] what do you—[/ the blonde is about to inquire his reasonings behind his visit this time, but she almost chokes on her own words. ] … what? [/ she hadn’t heard about that. ] … no he didn’t. [/ she denies it quickly; bjoo’s messing with her. ]
joo, stop playing around and come off your ‘hiatus’ and talk to me! [/ this form of communication ( whatever the hell this is ) is rather annoying at this point. she wants to see him, not letters —he can talk to her about this matter in person. ] i do listen to you. i just don’t think you’re right, is all. [/ dara didn’t mean to come off rude by saying that. she’d never want to be rude to bjoo and mean it—she truly thinks she’s not ‘crush-material’. what does that even mean? ]
you’re really strange, in a really nice way. i don’t know—i like hearing you talk about things. sometimes the information you give is useful, and sometimes it’s not, but it’s fun to hear all the same.
plus, you always sound so sure about everything.
i wish i was like that.
you know about cheondong, right? probably … which means, you also know that you look like him. i don’t know if that’s really true—my mind could be messing with me for all i know—but you’re a lot like him. it’s really nice, because it reminds me of home. a better one. when you come back from your ‘hiatus’ thingy, can you see if he’s ok? or … if he’s ‘written’ like that or whatever. i miss him.
i miss you too, of course!
hey … about the whole crush thing? honestly, i haven’t a clue what you’re talking about. i know you can see stuff and understand things that i can’t, but i don’t feel like i have a crush yet. when i do, you’ll probably know about it beforehand—and i’m not sure if it’s going to be the boy who makes me ‘powerless’, as you like to say.
when dior comes back, i’ll tease the both of you as payback.
—dara.
p.s.—thank you for being my friend even if you know about my past. it … makes it easier to be ok. with myself, i mean.
is it sad when people don't like you anymore, chanyeol? that's what the feeling is, right -- i think i'd be sad if you didn't like me. you're allowed to come up to my room but i don't know when we're supposed to have our movie time i don't know where en is -- ... dara says that she doesn't like luhan but her heart goes dokidoki and well, she gets red when she thinks about kissing him does that count?? why are you stuttering? are you denying your crush too --
( / he listens to the words quietly and pauses for a moment before nodding ) of course it’s sad. i’d be sad if you didn’t like me too, right? liking someone…friend, family or anything of that…is a very good feeling! ( / the name en confuses him and he scrunches up his face in a thinking manner trying to figure it out. en. en who is this en? ) we can have our movie anytime! even without this en person! ( / he nods albeit his interest in piqued at the thought of someone liking luhan ) that sounds super cute and definitely a crush. i think…yeah i’m sure…like 95%! ( / nods and casually pretends as if he didn’t hear the other words. as if those words weren’t having an impact with his thoughts enough )
8c does that mean you don't like me anymore, chanyeol??? i mean since i guess we can't watch movies anymore unless you come up to my room i don't know luhan but i'm sure he's very nice i think dara has a crush on him -- . .... .... are we not getting char his surprise birthday present then or --
( / he shakes his head furiously, hair whipping from side to side against his face ) no! i still like you alot bjoo!!! ( / a pout forms on his lips for such a thought even being considered ) and hey who says i can’t come up to your room. these legs make it super duper easy! ( / grins as he points at his long legs and pauses ) oh? luhannie has a secret admirerrr?~~ ( / the new information makes him grin wider before he pauses ) shhh we still will! j-just s-soon i guess. i still need to figure out what else i want to do…
you know i think it's pretty weird that you keep denying obvious things like, you know, the fact that you feel powerless ~~~~ after a certain ~ kiss and i mean, i'm pretty sure you have a crush cinny did say you have a small one so that means you have one you should probably just admit it now, dara. >: also, say hi to your brother for me! tell him i want to dye my hair pink one day just like him * ^*
[/ her expression is the definition of ‘what the hell’. it lasts for a single moment before oculars go up in flames, molten gold as her cheeks inflate. ] bjoo—i’ve gone over this with you over fifty. times. his mutation did that, [/ she sucks in a short breath in order to calm herself down enough to where she can speak properly, and not in choppy sentences. ] and no. i don’t have a crush on him.
[/ she’s in more of a pouty mood now, further softened by the mention of her younger brother. ] ok … ? [/ her eyes widen around the edges at the last few words uttered. ] wait, what? his hair is pink?
