If I didn't want a badass lady Arcadion fighter who uses a morbol feral soul in the heavyweight tier so bad, I'd be developing an Arcadion AU for Fenumin
Fandom: Dragon Age
Rating: T? sex mention but nothing graphic
Ship: Dacien/random oc, Dacien/Halan hinting
Summary: Dacien contemplates some of his life decisions pt 2
Dacien slips from the aravel as discreetly as possible, rolling his shoulders and stretching as his feet touch the ground. He intends to go find Halan, or perhaps go to his own aravel for a nap and let Halan find him later as his injuries are minor and mostly just sore muscles, but his feet take him in neither direction, instead finding himself sat on a crate some distance between his two destinations.
He kicks his feet to feel and hear the soft thud of his heels as they swing back against the crate and he stares at his hands in his lap. What was he doing? The entire clan knew he was following Fenumin’s footsteps and sleeping his way through anyone willing. And likely everyone knew that it was almost a direct result to Fenumin settling down. So what was he doing? Was he trying to find himself in others’ beds? Or was he trying to lose himself?
He hadn’t stopped to think about it, hadn’t thought the first time he propositioned someone, nor any of the times he was naked for anyone. He didn’t want to think, didn’t want to think about how Fenumin had used him, wakened a need he didn’t know he had and then left him. Didn’t want to think about how he knew it was going to happen and never braced for it. Didn’t want to think about any repercussions of his own actions. And wasn’t that the very definition of losing himself in others?
But was he going to stop? The very thought left him feeling as empty as he did the moment he knew Fenumin would never again pin him to his lap, no longer kiss him fiercely and tell him how he wasn’t anything but a go to in between fucks. That he wasn’t more than someone to kiss to take the edge off. Sleeping with others never made him feel complete the way part of him did held tight and kissed hard by someone he knew didn’t care about him.
Was that the problem then? Did he need to find someone who wanted nothing more than sex from him? Someone who would kick him out and disregard him when they were done? Was there even anyone in the clan capable of such? Was that even what he truly wanted?
Dacien catches his gaze drifting to Halan, speaking with Sulahn. Halan, who had been his friend ever since he could remember, Halan who was the First for the clan and would be Keeper after Sulahn. If he wanted someone who didn’t care, then why was he always drawn to Halan who obviously cared deeply for him?
Frustrated, Dacien aggressively rubs his hands over his face. He didn’t feel used when he left any of his bedmates the same way he always did when Fenumin had been finished with him. Likely because he was the one doing the pursuit, always the one doing the propositions, always the one who left once done, never truly kicked out. And a part of him he could feel craving that same sensation, craving someone to come to him, to use him, not simply to offer himself up like a sacrifice to anyone willing to take him. But also another part of him was drawn to Halan’s gentleness, their care. He wasn’t sure what that meant.
With a sigh, he slides off the crate and deciding he was done thinking about this for the moment, instead continuing to Halan’s aravel for a nap, not wanting to interrupt them and Sulahn, but wanting them to know he was done should they wish to look him over for bruises or other injuries they deemed in need of healing. It would hardly be the first time he slept in their bed.
I have a Fenumin alt, which is hilarious, because Fenumin can't fight. He's a fragile wilting flower. His entire approach to self-defense is basically "I'm just a little guy. You wouldn't hit a little guy, would you?"
