May 20, 2025
Can I borrow someone's tongue?
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Can I borrow someone's tongue?
Here's Another one of my funny sexcapades...
I went on a date with a guy one time. He was kind of geeky and we didn't have much in common but he seemed like a nice guy so I said what the hell.
It wasn't a very good date and I spent most of the night listening to him talk about his ex. We had zero chemistry and it was obvious he was not going to be a good match going forward. It was a really fancy and upscale restaurant and he was truly a gentleman which I always appreciate.
At the end of the night, as he was dropping me off, he wanted a good night kiss. I definitely wasn't feeling much, if any, attraction to him but he did treat me well and spent a bundle on our date So i was ok with a little bit of tonsil hockey.
To my surprise, he was a very good kisser and I found myself actually getting into it. So we made out a little bit in his car, and to make a long story short, I ended up jerking him off. He came all over his pants. It was a pretty big mess.
A few days later, he asked if we could go out again and I didn't want to strong him along or milk the guy for all his money, so I politely declined citing because I really didn't feel a love connection as the reason. He said "that's fine but you owe me $12.50 for the cleaning bill for my pants".
I wish I thought of a witty comeback. Something like "well it was a $25 handjob and you owe ME $12.50" or something.🤣
I told him to send me the bill.... And he ACTUALLY did. I never paid him for the cleaning fee, and I still have the receipt he sent to this day in my box of memories. 🤣
Whoa ..what are you doing?
Are you doing what I THINK you are doing?
Oh wow it's been so long since you have done that for me. I'd forgotten how good it feels to just sit back and enjoy. Ooh. Yes.... Just like that.... No don't stop.... keep going. Oh my that's so good. Perfect...you're so good at this. Yes!! Yes!!! Yes!!!
Honey? When you're done in here. Can you please vacuum the living room too?
This Tumblr DEFINITELY contains sensitive content.
If my fairy Godmother was watching me in bed this morning she would have literally been like Bippity-Boppity What the ever loving Fuck?
😂😂😂
A healthy dose of Good dick can do anything...
Well, except divide by Zero