When will love find me?
I often ask myself this question the more I see and read about other people's relationships. I'll see cute videos on tiktok about the nice thing one partner does for another and wonder: Will I ever feel that way for someone?
I've only ever had one serious relationship in my life back in high school. I only ever remember it feeling too much and unstable, but electric. It's been about 7 years since then and I've yet to seriously date anyone even during my college years. I feel like with the nature of my job and where I live, the likelihood of meeting new and single people is unlikely.
Sometimes, I want to ask my future sister-in-law how she feels when she is with my brother. They're getting married early next year and I often wonder just how does she know she wants to spend the rest or her foreseeable life with him? How does one feel that way about a person? To be able to feel whole and content and known.
It's most likely the anxiety disorder part of my brain that can't grasp the concept of forever or feeling content, but I would like to think it feels good.
