#fittingend

[campbelt]

What a great sunset over Byou St John Sunday walking to friends’ house. Another one in the books! Until next year...Happy @jazzfest . #fittingend #jazzfest #sunset #bayoustjohn #nola #igersneworleans #jazzfest50 #igersnola (at Bayou St. John, New Orleans) https://www.instagram.com/p/BxIv0zjFVBF/?utm_source=ig_tumblr_share&igshid=7qg189qm8t09

[cariad-tragwyddol]

While it was happening, my friends never realised anything was really wrong, they just carried on as normal and me with them, and while their not coming this evening was a pain and an inconvenience, it meant that I ended this particular story the same way the entire story was told. With me dealing with the difficult, the emotionally challenging and my problems of the situation on my own.

I never wanted them all to know that things were going wrong, while I did confide details in an individual during the mistakes, most of my problem solving was done alone or with my counsellor. Partly this was because I was told by someone not to tell my friends because I was hurting them by sharing my pain and that I was wrong to do so. But this allowed me to keep a smile on my face and battle on through and only now afterwards have a few of them seen some of what it's done, and none of them know every mistake and bad decision I have made. None of them know the full effect it has had.

So doing that on my own is a fitting end, and also a fitting start to the new.

It means that this is the last thing I will try to do on my own, I have people I can trust and rely on (perhaps not trely on to turn up to a barbecue but at the end of the day it's no great loss c:), to confide in and who will be there for me.

Out with the old and in with the new.

This is the final end of this chapter of my life, and is one I will never re-read again.