Note to Self. (Reminding myself of what I already know.)
There’s something initially comforting about apathy. When you make an effort not to care about something, it becomes impossible to enjoy anything, but there’s a small amount of pleasure in knowing you can’t be hurt by what you don’t care about, and in caring about nothing you live without risk of a broken heart. But there is a risk in apathy that hardly anyone considers: in caring about nothing, you have nothing. In having nothing, you experience nothing. In experiencing nothing, you have no reason to live for anything. And eventually, that gives you little motivation to live at all. Apathy isn’t the answer. Apathy is the problem. Don’t romanticize being emotionally blocked from any meaningful connection to anything around you. Instead, seek to break the cycle of fear-turned-apathy-turned-hopelessness and make yourself care about something-anything that will put your attention on something other than just yourself. Because apathy is selfish, cruel, and meaningless. Because you are more than apathy, self-focus, and depression. You care more than you know when you swear you couldn’t care less. Stop fooling yourself. Be the amazing, care-filled, full-of-life person that you are!
