The Beginning
Destiel, 323 Words, Admissions, Fluff, Dean POV.
Cas took Dean's hand in both of his— earnest eyes unfaltering—causing Dean to feel like he might puke. Or laugh. Maybe both. But he sure as shit couldn't look away, no matter how he squirmed.
Cas brought the hand to his mouth and pressed it right into the centre, firm and warm. His other hand came to Dean's wrist then fingertips were trailing down his forearm. And he just… held on like that; lips attached to palm; hand cradling elbow.
Then he said, "I heard your prayer. When we returned to Purgatory? And I'm sorry too. So sorry, for everything. And I…" Cas held on tighter, "I love you, Dean. I've always loved you."
Dean looked away at that. It was… That was too much. Too brutally honest, even if he already knew it to be the truth. It was too beautiful for Dean.
Moments passed before he managed, "But I—those things I said…" he'd said Cas was as good as dead to him.
"I love you, Dean. And there is nothing that will ever change that. And there's nothing you can do to stop it. So, forgive yourself. I have forgiven you. As I've had to forgive myself, so many times… I love you and I'm done holding back."
Well, shit.
Dean wanted to run, far away. Wanted several full glasses of scotch. Wanted to shout and scream for help as much as he wanted to scream his I love you too, Cas from the top of the bunker.
He did none of those things. What he did do was take Cas' free hand and bring it to his cheek, closing his eyes for a moment at the softness of it. Then he looked at Cas again, at that unending blue.
"Yeah," was all he could manage. But it was enough, for now.
Dean then hugged Cas, tight. One hand wrapped around his trench coat shoulders, the other gripping the back of Cas' neck, fingers splayed through the dark, curled ends of his hair.
Dean knew this wasn't the end of their forgiveness of each other, of themselves. But he knew it was was the beginning.
Their beginning.
.
(for @shealynn88 bc i love you <3)
