The reason
Summary: Thinking back to all the times Y/N had been there for him, Tom realises something very important.
Pairing: Tom Hiddleston x Reader
Warnings: none? fluff overload?
Wordcount: 1800+
AN: ‘Ello! Well... this wasn’t exactly requested or anything like that. It also doesn’t exactly have any of the prompts from my celebration prompts (unless you count this as *sharing a bed*?)... I just had the idea and I felt like writing it so I’m counting it as one of the seven fics of this week! Hope you guys enjoy!
They laid in bed, Y/N cuddled into Tom’s side, his hand drawing soft, awkward patterns on her back. Her breathing was slow. Her sleep peaceful. He looked down to her and wished her eyes were open. He wanted to drown in those beautiful eyes again and again and again. He could’ve stopped touching her, he probably should have, but he knew he never would. His eyes shone with love as he stared at her. He loved having her around. He loved listening to her talk and hearing her laughter. He loved watching her as she watched him. And he had finally realized, he simply loved her.
They had been through so much together. He knew he had been such a pain sometimes, and still, she stuck around, not giving up on him.
The long months while his parents went through their divorce - that was the first thing that came to Tom’s mind. How she had enveloped him in her arms, letting him cry for hours. Her warmth helped him pull himself together at the time. He didn’t know what he would’ve done without her.
The talk about love had come only months later, after his parents had separated. They were lazing around her room, mindlessly humming along to music and flipping through books.
“Do you believe in soulmates?” she had asked.
The question made Tom stiff up, having taken him by surprise. He thought for a moment before his parents’ relationship came to mind. They had been so in love and it had all fallen apart so quickly. He definitely didn’t believe in that, so why would he believe in soulmates. “No,” he answered simply. “Do you?”
Y/N smiled, a soft and warm smile that made Tom all giddy for some reason. “I guess… but I think I believe in the love of my life more,” she said.
Tom raised a quizzical eyebrow, the right corner of his lips pulling upwards into a smirk. “Is there a difference?” he asked.
Y/N’s mouth fell open comically, as if she had just had the world’s worst insult thrown at her. “Of course there’s a difference!” she exclaimed, giggling lightly.
“Okay, I’ll indulge you. What’s the difference?” he asked, amused by the way she was acting. This was exactly why they were best friends. He had come over in such a bad mood, but she always knew exactly what to do to get him to loosen up.
Y/N looked thoughtful for a moment, as if she didn’t know the answer. Then, suddenly, her eyes lit up, as if a bulb had somehow lit inside her head. “One is a choice, one is predestined,” she answered, as though it was painfully obvious. “It’s clear as day,” she added, as though to make it even more evident.
Tom chuckled, shaking his head. “Yeah, I guess that makes sense.” He swallowed drily, his mouth suddenly dry. “If you believe in that stuff.”
“In what stuff?” she asked, eyebrows furrowed.
“I don’t know… Relationships? All the ‘meant-to-be’ stuff? True love?” Tom shrugged.
Now it was Y/N’s turn for her mouth to go dry. “You don’t believe in love?” she asked.
Tom’s lips pulled into a thin line and one of his shoulders shrugged upwards. “I do believe in love… I just don’t think it’s meant to last… I guess? It’s a fickle feeling,” he said. “So unpredictable and unstable. You could love someone one moment and hate them the other. It only takes one wrong move. One wrong word. Only one.”
Y/N’s eyes grew wide. God, her best friend could be so dramatic sometimes. “I can’t even begin to explain how wrong you are, Tom.”
“How am I wrong?” he asked.
“Well for one, love isn’t fickle, it’s ever-changing. But just because it changes doesn’t mean it’s gone.” She shrugged. “It may be unpredictable, but that’s what’s so wonderful about it. You can’t control it. It’s always there, keeping you warm. And it’s definitely not unstable.” She giggled, continuing to flip through her book.
Tom nodded, slowly understanding where she was coming from. He definitely felt warm. “I still don’t understand what’s so good about believing in love.”
“What’s so good about not believing in love? What’s to gain from that? Pain? Loneliness?” She looked to her friend - her stupidly smart and yet weirdly idiotic friend. “Don’t you believe that I love you?” she asked.
His eyes went wide for a moment, his mind going directly to what she had said only seconds prior. For a second, he misunderstood her words. His heart started beating rapidly in his chest and his mind was screaming at him to run, to get away. But then, he shook his head and looked at her and she was smiling that warm smile of hers and he couldn’t help but smile back. She was his best friend, obviously she loved him and he loved her. “That’s a different type of love,” he said.
“Doesn’t matter. Love is love,” she said. And Tom could only agree. Love was love, and he wanted to believe in her love for him.
She was the one who had told him he should go into acting. That he was a drama-queen and it would definitely benefit him in no other career other than that. She had said it as a joke, but he slowly started looking into it. He joined the drama club and it definitely did him good. He had found his passion.
But it was a tough crowd out there, and as soon as he had brought it to his father’s attention that he wanted to go train in acting, he was decidedly against it. He had told Tom to give up on wild dreams, that he would never make it out there.
But Y/N was by his side when he was ready to give up. She saw how happy acting made Tom. She saw how his eyes sparkled whenever he was researching a new character. And she saw the potential, the talent.
She had given him a very stern look, telling him that if he even dared to think about doing anything else she would kill him with her own two hands and hide his naked body in a dumpster.
He obviously knew that she was joking, but seeing her having so much trust in him and his abilities definitely gave him the one last push that he needed. He knew he would make it. He would prove his father wrong.
He watched as she slept soundly, his hand suddenly shaking as it moved aimlessly on her skin. He felt warm. His heart was beating erratically in his chest, making her head move up and down slightly. She stirred lightly and finally her eyes opened. She stared directly into his blue ones, her expression turning from calm to adorably quizzical. Realization flashed through her eyes and she smiled softly at him, snuggling closer into his side.
“Good morning, sleeping beauty.” Tom looked at her, cheeks slightly pushing at his eyes as he smiled brightly.
“Morning, Tomy,” she muttered sleepily. Her hair moved over her face, allowing him to inhale her scent deeply. He loved how she smelled. Vanilla and ink, an awkward combination and yet so undeniably her.
She had grown to become an author, her love for books and writing leading the way. And they had grown slightly less close, but he never failed to find his way back to her. Because she was the one to always be by his side. Much like now.
He couldn’t believe how calm he was, given the fact that he had been a mess only days prior. He had found out that his girlfriend had been cheating on him, and his first thought was Y/N. He drove to her apartment, knocking on the door at one am. She had slid it open fairly quick, one of her hands rubbing at her sleep-coated eyes. She had given him a worried look and ushered him inside.
She had managed to calm him down by only being there. She always had that kind of influence on him.
And he finally noticed, she was the one he needed. All the others… they were some type of clones of Y/N. He had looked for traits of hers in them, and fallen for those traits, not for the actual person.
She was the reason he was who he was who he was.
“Have you slept?” she asked.
“No.” Tom shrugged, moving her slightly with him.
“Aren’t you sleepy?” She hid a yawn underneath her palm.
“I’m perfectly fine, love.”
She was the reason he couldn’t sleep. His mind was racing as much as his heart, both insanely perceptive of every move she made. What with his new realization, what else was he supposed to do but think of her? She was the reason why he believed in love. She was the reason for everything.
“Are you allright?” She noticed him gazing down at her, that stupidly love-sick smile on his face.
“Mhm.”
Tom knew there was no hope for him anymore. He had fallen for his best friend, and he guessed that it had actually happened a long time ago. She was it for him. And now that he knew it, he couldn’t stop himself.
“What’s wrong?” she asked.
“I love you,” he said.
She smiled at him, that same smile that had him all warm on the inside and giddy on the outside. “I love you too.” she said.
Tom chuckled, shaking his head. “No, love. I mean it. I love you. As in: fickle, unpredictable, unstable, ever-changing love. The love kind of love.”
Y/N’s eyes widened, continuously glancing from one of his eyes to the other, searching for any type of clue that he was messing around. She smiled when she found none, nestling her head in the crook of his neck. “Took you long enough.”
Her breath tickled his skin, light and airy and warm. A smile pulled at his lips, his eyes once again gazing down on her.
His hand moved to the side of her face, lightly stroking her soft skin. She lifted her head and in that moment his lips crashed down on hers. Urgently, passionately, he kissed her, his heart bursting with the new-found feeling. She sighed as he moved away, her cheeks turning a soft pink.
In that moment he knew he would do anything in the world for his girl, his best-friend, the love of his life. She then moved back in, continuing where he had left off.
The kiss had been years in the making, and he wished that he could turn back the time. If he could, he would’ve done this much, much earlier. He would’ve made sure to keep her as close as possible and never let her go. But the past didn’t matter anymore, everything was more perfect than he could’ve ever imagined.
“I love you too,” she said.
Taglist:
@artisticlales @theoneanna @imnotusedtobeingloved @im-a-slut-for-an-accent @kcd15 @drakesfiance @thequeenofgood