meme: An Insanely Detailed Ask Meme (…) // status: accepting!
Samwise: Have you ever done something for a friend that you would never have done on your own?
Nothing necessarily comes to mind, my friends and I are pretty much one in the same. For the most part we all travel on the same wave. However, I do seem to be more involved with my friends’ emotional statuses than my own, and vice versa. I don’t know if that’s a good thing or not, but I know we’ve always fought like gladiators for one another but don’t put half as much effort in for our own fights. It’s weird, possibly even unhealthy. And it’s definitely not to say that we can’t fight for ourselves or need to be rescued all the time. But all of my close friends are little pieces of myself, and I feel as if the best way to protect myself is to be good and do all I can for them because they’re all I have, really. I guess once we all became friends, protecting one another seemed more vital than protecting ourselves. And at the same time, someone was always going to be there to say the words you couldn’t. It’s nice to know that someone out there is always fighting for the things you deserve, even when you get too tired to. I spend a lot of my time fighting for the things they deserve, as they do for me. It might be as important then, but we never forget it because of this cycle of loyalty.
meme: An Insanely Detailed Ask Meme (…) // status: accepting!
Gimli: Have you ever had an opinion about someone that turned out to be completely wrong?
Honestly, too many to bring up. The ones that hurt the most always involve the relationship I have with my unnies. People have attacked me greatly for my career, and think it’s prospered at the expense of my unnies when that isn’t true. If I didn’t leave our mother company after our solo debut to go to one I knew would catapult my career, we would all be in the same boat and no one would be talking. I made a decision for myself and what I wanted to do with my life and I shouldn’t be faulted for that. A lot of people say things like “I’d hate Gain if I was a member” but forget that my biggest supporters are my members! I consult with them for concepts, I ask them for advice, they’re there for me when I’m scared and I doubt myself. They act, they direct, they produce, they compose, they write songs…they do so many things that I can’t do nor do I want to do. I let them do what they want and support them 100% of the way, why wouldn’t they support me? It doesn’t make any sense, and I don’t think people realize that. Not to mention the fact the my unnies are six full years older than I am. They have different agendas now and honestly always had. I shouldn’t have to halt my life, because they want to take breaks. They have a right to live how they want to, and so do I. I want to sing and perform as much as I can and I am not wrong. But these negative comments everyone seems to have about me and a relationship they clearly know nothing about are.
Arwen: Did you ever make a decision your family didn’t agree with?
We, as in Brown Eyed Girls, only really did mildly sexy concepts and performances up until Abracadabra. At first I was a little scared, because I came from a super conservative family and I didn’t want to upset my parents. I went through with it anyways, despite what they might of felt, and it honestly was one of the best decisions I ever made. All of us, really. The song has went down in history for our industry, the dance is still one of the most beloved dances in k-pop of all time. I’m proud of it’s success–but we are more than it and I don’t want people to forget that, either.
It also opened my own eyes and made me stop being afraid of speaking my mind about things. I went on to reinvent myself and my life really. I’m not afraid to wear something short, or talk about sex openly…I’m a woman. A grown woman. Some of my family gets it, and some don’t. That is fine with me. My mother, whom is my heart, loves me and comes to as many of my performances she can. She even went to our 26+ concert and watched me kissed Narsha unnie and didn’t scold me or look at me differently. I’m the sexy icon for Korea and my mother is okay with it. Therefore, I’m not concerned about anyone other than her who doesn’t agree with my adult decisions. They can kindly take a seat with everyone else who has nothing nice to say.
Thorin: What have you lost that you wish to regain?
I have lost many pieces of myself trying to please and be good enough for others. I lost out on many things I’ve wanted to do as well as losing out on relationships, because of this. Instead of focusing on what I wanted to be, I tried my hardest to make myself everything that everyone else wanted. I suffered greatly from it, and while I’ve finally mustered the courage to dig myself out of the hole I dug for myself because of it, I have a very long way to go. However, I have no intentions on giving up any time soon. I deserve all of myself and I’m not stopping until I’ve claimed who I am back.
Brutal honesty hour: J, U, N, G, M, I, N (second faourite)
J - Are you insecure. What about?
I’m definitely confident for the most part. However, sometimes I feel as if I lack in skills compared to my unnies. They’re composers, lyricists, directors, and all of these great things beside their obvious talent. They’re voices can sometimes overshadow mine. I often get comments like “I didn’t know Gain could actually sing” or “When did Gain’s voice get like that?”. I’m known more for the way I talk than I sing and sometimes it can be a little discouraging. My performances are far more recognized than my actual singing abilities and it makes me wonder about it sometimes. I know I’m a good singer–a great one, to be honest, and I mean that as humbly–but sometimes I seem to stop believing it and that’s when my insecurities about my abilities come to play.
U - Favourite time of year, and why
Definitely late fall/winter. I absolutely love cold weather. A large part of that is due to the fashion I’m able to wear. I have a lot of over-sized sweaters and other articles of clothing that might make me die of a heatstroke if I wore it at any other time of the year.
N - Favourite animal?
Dog! Puppies are literally the cutest things ever. They’re so lovable and loyal. They’re always there for you whenever you need them because they’re just as reliant and needy for affection as you are. Whenever I’m upset I just curl up in my bed with my dogs and we just eat and cuddle until everything is better. I love my dogs. I love all dogs. Dogs are my whole life.
G - The last person I said ‘I love you’ to.
Miryo unnie! Her solo dropped today and I was so proud of her! I haven’t stopped telling her all day!
M - If I forgive betrayal.
I’d like to say no, but I’m really a sucker. I’m extremely emotional, and because of that I have a lot of weight on my heart. I don’t like to add to it, so I often find myself forgiving people for things I probably shouldn’t.
I - The last time I felt jealous, and why.
I saw a picture of a former lover not to long ago, and all I could see was the face of the girl he chose over me. It hurt a lot, because I felt as if I was the better fit for him, but he showed me that wasn’t the case. I never got the real explanation I needed, so I’ve been left with pretty much no closure since he left me. That’s definitely made my heart heavy over the years. I get a bitter taste in my mouth each time I have to think about it.
N - Favourite animal? (second favorite)
Bear, definitely! The polar bear is definitely my favorite bear. I can watch Polar bear documentaries all day. I love the first sightings of the babies when they get out the den. They’re just like little fluff balls of utter cuteness! I fall in love each time I lay my eyes on one!
7.Successful females are often a huge source of inspiration for other females. Are there any women you look up to?
Answered here.
11.Some female artists are heavily marketed as such to appeal to an older, male audience. Do you see any problem(s) with this?
I debuted as an adult, so from the get-go I was strictly supposed to be marketed towards an older audience, even more so when Abracadabra hit (especially with males); I never got the chance to understand what it would be like to be a minor in the industry. I feel as if a lot of the younger female idols have less of a choice when it comes to their images. I feel like sometimes they feel as if they have no choice certain things on because they feel as if they speak up, bad things might happen to them. It’s not everyday that you see a trainee or rookie speaking his or her mind, leave a company, and then get picked right back up by another. So, I think a lot of them hold their tongues, and that isn’t right. When thinking about how these minor idols are marketed towards older male audiences, I’m torn between values I was taught by my parents and the ones I’ve learned as I’ve gotten a chance to know myself via being in the industry. On one hand, it’s like, why are you forcing or making these minors believe they won’t be popular without sexualizing them? On the other, it’s why are we even trying to over sexualize these girls in the first place? I don’t think these girls’ comfort should be second place to their images in any way. I think older female idols who’s brands are meant to target the older, male audience–like Brown Eyed Girls–should definitely speak up about this more often. If not completely publicly, then to their company trainees set to debut. Girls that think they have to be one way in order to be successful in this industry are set to have lower self-esteem or be a target of hate. It’d be a complete shame for that to happen to any of these girls.
20. Some managers have been reprimanded for their conduct whilst protecting their artists. In some cases such harsh behaviour was unnecessary but in some, it was for the safety of the artists with some having been attacked in the past. Do you think such a high level of security is justified?
It’s no secret that fans can get a bit out of control when their idols pass them by. We’ve all experienced a set of rowdy fans–some of us more than others. I don’t condone beating anyone to a bloody pulp or anything, but sometimes some sort of force is necessarily. One to two managers protecting a group of more than three people is quite the hassle, especially if they’re very popular. If four or five fans grab a hold at the same time, what else is the manager supposed to do but use a little bit of force to get the idol out of potential harm? Now, idol managers shouldn’t beat a ninety pound, fifteen year old girl in the head or face in order for her to let go of the idol’s hand. When it comes to large groups of fans, who are all highly unpredictable, some sort of force is destined to be used. We can’t make the fans be less rowdy or completely understand that they risk an idol’s safety by grabbing hold like they do. If companies want less situations between idol managers and what they do to keep fans under control and off the idols, they’d either create safer routes for idols to travel in and out of buildings or hire more security. If they don’t do either, there’s really not much they can do.
6. Do you ever feel as if your male counterparts (either labelmates or other artists in general) have ever gotten preferential treatment because of their sex? If so, how did it make you feel?
Before Abracadabra, I would say yes, but afterwards I would say no. I wasn’t nearly as outspoken then as I am now. I totally demand my respect, especially from my CEOs of my companies and my producers. I don’t have the time to be treated as if I’m not worth as much as someone else because they have something different in between their legs. I won’t ever be able to sit back and allow that to happen. IU-ssi calls me the Female CEO because I seriously do not play when it comes to things that I need done for myself and my music. I’m a successful performer and business woman, and I always demand to be taken seriously and given the treatment I rightfully deserve. I highly recommend for all other female artists and entertainers to do the same. Don’t let anyone make you feel like you’re second. Demand that they always treat you like you’re the first place winner. Things will be a lot easier in this industry if you do.
15. The South Korean standard of beauty is a very singular one. Do you feel as if you fit into it? What effects has it had on you and/or how it makes you perceive yourself?
I totally don’t and I’ll happily admit to it. My unnies and I debuted as the “faceless idol group” because we knew our looks weren’t up to par with the standards Korea held before us. The four of us did get plastic surgery as a result of that and we’re not ashamed. My surgeries weren’t as extensive, but I did get and I’m not ashamed of it. I even went to the extreme to get things about my appearance to change naturally. The four of us are all more happy with ourselves. We still don’t, however, fit into that standard but that doesn’t make us any less beautiful than the next woman. I’m happy with who I am and how I look.
19. Do you believe women should embrace playing up their sexuality or do you believe they should remain more conservative?
I think women should be able to decide freely whether they want to be more sexual or more conservative, without people thinking so negatively about either. It’s perfectly fine for a woman to be conservative, it doesn’t make her a prude nor does it mean she’s uncomfortable with herself. People have different reasons for everything. However, in the same manner women shouldn’t have to feel shameful for wanting to own their sexuality. There’s nothing wrong with wanting to be sexy–it doesn’t make a woman easy or have a lack of self-respect. The key word in self-respect is self after all. As long as the woman herself is comfortable, why does it even matter which branch she decides to tuck herself in? I just personally hate to see women think that they can’t play up their sexuality because they think people are going to look upon them negatively. There’s absolutely nothing wrong with showcasing your sexual side, all of us humans have it somewhere inside, even if we never act on it. I’m a full supporter of women embracing their sexuality. As a woman who is in full tune with my sexuality (both on and off the stage), I’m just as talented, beautiful, successful, and intelligent as a conservative woman. As long as you don’t bash another woman for choosing to be more open about her sexuality or choosing to be more conservative, then everything is fine.
3. South Korea is still very much a conservative nation despite heavy influence from the more liberal West and so a level of censorship still exists to this day when it comes to things like choreography and stage outfits. Some say this level of censorship is higher for women than it is men. Do you agree?
It’s totally higher for women. I mean, Narsha unnie got a 19+ rating on one of her videos because they said she looked too sexy while she was driving. I’m mean seriously, what does that even mean? It’s honestly ridiculous sometimes. I totally understand wanting to maintain childhood innocence and a family atmosphere, but sometimes censorship can be a bit much. Men are allowed more room and leeway , even if it’s by a slight margin, to do things without censorship lingering above their heads. As soon as a sexy concept is thought about for women, we’re risking being banned. Men have been able to flash abs, wear clothing that would be considered highly revealing for women, and get away with lyrics that their female counterparts would not have. I think it’s time for that level of censorship to be reevaluated, primarily because I believe it almost brings shame to the wonders of the female body. All women should have the right to be or feel sexy if they want to without having to be punished for it. Let them be free. It’s not like anyone’s asking to run around Music Bank naked or anything, but that’s exactly how people are acting when it comes to women and their concepts and clothes.
8. Sex sells. There’s no doubt about that but do you feel as if you’ve ever been pushed too far when it comes to how you and/or your group have been marketed?
Definitely not. I’m a grown woman and so are my unnies. The world is not all rainbows, teddy bears, and shy pecks on the cheek. It’s so tiring for people to only display that kind of love. I’m not a child anymore and I’m not going to act like it for the sake of others’ comfort. I’m completely in control of my body. If I want to wear short clothing on stage, then so be it. Nobody has the right to come at me negatively because of it. I’m a grown woman, let me be one. There’s absolutely nothing wrong with being comfortable with your sexuality and letting people know. I do consider myself a pioneer in this industry when it comes to that. Of course, there were women who did sexy and strong before me (and my unnies) but not to the extent after I did. I’m proud of the doors I’ve re-opened for other female idols. There’s no need to feel shame or act as if you’re only good for your body. People make women think that when they were short clothing or do a sexy concept, they’re not letting their talents show. But honey, I’ve got news for everyone, I can sing just as good in a tight semi see-through one piece than I can in sweats. Try me. If people really have a problem with it, why don’t they just become coordi unnies, choreographers, directors, or CEOs. Until then, everyone with something negative to say about a person (especially a woman) doing as he/she pleases with their body, needs to take a step back and focus on themselves.
16. Have you ever compromised your health for the sake of becoming more “beautiful”?
I definitely have, but unfortunately I think it’s just something that comes along with being in the industry. All of us have done some form of extreme dieting or extreme exercise to get a sense of perfectness. It’s a dangerous thing and I’ve suffered major consequences from it. I’ve collapsed. I’ve been dehydrated. I’ve been unable to perform. It’s effected my vocals while performing. I’m not nearly as extreme about trying to get the “perfect figure”, I just do my best to maintain my health so that I’ll be able to perform for my fans. I learned it the hard way, but health is definitely way more important than anything for me now.
7. Successful females are often a huge source of inspiration for other females. Are there any women you look up to?
When it comes to performing, I definitely received a lot of inspiration from Lee Hyori unnie. I actually got the privilege of working with her on my last album, and it was honestly one of the most amazing things that have happened in my nine years of being in the industry. I also look up to my three unnies for reasons that a lot of people overlook. Miryo unnie and JeA unnie have the most copy written songs of any female idol. They also are successful vocal coaches. Miryo unnie is the one who taught Yubin-ah how to rap and look at how wonderful she’s become. JeA unnie was the one who strengthened my voice. Narsha unnie is a successful comedian, director, actress, and a once in a lifetime performer. I don’t have composing talents and my voice isn’t like JeA unnie’s or Narsha unnie’s, so they really pushed me to be the best performer I could possibly be to make sure I didn’t feel as if I was lacking. I definitely owe these four unnies it all. There would be no Son Gain without Lee Hyori or the Brown Eyed Girls unnie line!
12.“Female idols exist not for their musical talents but to sell a fantasy.” Talk about how that statement affects you/what it makes you think.
“They’re making up a fantasy so that they can control you and me.” That’s a line from my title track “Paradise Lost” off of my latest album. I think a lot of people paint this image of what women are supposed to be and attempt to stuff them all in a single box as if we’re all supposed to be the same. A lot of talent (of female idols) is overlooked because of concepts they might have, me being one of the victims of that. Instead of focusing on my vocal talent or the lyrics in my songs, a lot of people boil me down to what I decide to wear on stage and it’s not fair. A lot of people (particularly women) have it in their minds’ that I’m just some sleazy woman with who lacks morals and is out to steal and seduce everyone’s man so that they can feel better about themselves in some way. Or, we have other people (particular men) that think I’m some easy woman with no standards, and I’ll lay down and do whatever they want me to. Neither are true, but in order to fulfill a person’s own specific wants and needs, they try to boil me down to either this and that. It happens to all people in the industry, but mainly women. We no longer become real people with real emotions, but silent props for perverted men and target practice for women uncomfortable with themselves. I completely exist because of my musical talents, that’s why I’m in the music industry. I’ve been here for nine years, and still people don’t talk about my vocal talent, only what I decide to perform in and that’s terrible. It seems like it’s worst than ever though, I’m just hoping all the new girls in the industry have tough enough skin for everything that’s going to be thrown their way.
