And the truth is, I never really been in love. I just pretend. cause the truth is, I only respect people who treat me good and doing the same things to them. maybe, I did but I assume that's only a love that's like the love to your sister and parents, but you did it to your fucking best friend. sometimes I fight, get jealous, and mad cause he changed and a bit careless, but didn't mean I want to have all of him, you know. Once, I did, but then I realize I was just too late to realize and make it a happy ending. haha i am too selfish and childish to know about love while he still messing around me. Now he gave up on me, and moved on. so, do I. but I still love him like I love my sister and parents. And as a time goes by, that feeling is still the same, and I think he knows it and we appreciate everything that happened between us. Maybe someday I'll find someone who really make me fall in love. I don't know how it really feels but every feeling that I felt and pretend as a love is never that eternal. or maybe there's no true love? I dont know but I think every feeling is just the result of one particular even or act that can change easilly as a blink of an eye. Maybe that's love but I have a great expectation about love so I dont think that's love cause it dont fit with my expectation. PS: This is not about you. This is about me. (I am not a native speaker of English and I dont check grammar and spelling but I HATE it when gone wrong. Holly crap I am just too lazy to reread sorry wkwk)