Gavin’s journey as Dad : The Arrival
Fandom : MLQC/Koipro/Love and Producer
Pairing : GavinxReader
Words : 3,702
Warning : A little bit of angst, just a bit. Shaw appears at the end.
The song MC asked for Gavin to play :
First trimester
Your first trimester of pregnancy? It was hell. You’d throw up over and over you couldn’t even drink water and you got admitted to hospital for a week. Even Gavin who always did his paperwork in his office before coming home decided to bring all his paperwork to hospital so he could accompany you.The craving was also...a little overwhelming. You would woke Gavin at 3AM, because you crave cookie dough, and the poor man decided to made it himself while yawning, visibly tired from a mission. But he did it nonetheless. The smile on your face when you enjoyed the dough was worth it.
There was also a time when Gavin just got home from work and the first thing you said to him was “Sing a song for me, please? With your guitar?” You wished you could record Gavin’s reaction at that time. He had the most confused look on his face.
“What?” Gavin asked again, dumbfounded.
“I...i want to hear you play your guitar.” you repeated.
“Is it one of your craving today?” Gavin’s look softened, amused even.
You nodded. Gavin, being a doting husband he is, he would listen and make all of your craving came true. So you were sitting on the couch beside him as he played his guitar. He didn’t sing but he hummed to the melody he played. You feel relaxed, yawning even. Gavin stopped playing when he heard your soft snore. One of his hand held your shoulder, while his other hand put the guitar away. He pulled you close to him as he kissed the top of your head.
Gavin also developed a little hobby of his rubbing your belly before and after he went to work. He would smile and told the unborn baby, “Be good, okay?” You just giggled because it was so cute.
Second trimester
Both you and Gavin just got into the apartment from having dinner outside when the doorbell rang, revealing all of your coworker outside. You hugged Anna, WIllow and Kiki and let them in as Minor walked in the last. With a box in his hand, earning a questioning look from Gavin.
“What’s that?” Gavin asked. Minor grinned, “You will like it, bro!” Gavin shrugged and let him in.
All of you were in the living room, sitting on the couch. You sat beside Gavin as he rubbed your back. The box Minor brought in was placed in the coffee table right in the middle of the room. Anna stood up, picking out an envelope from her purse.
“I believe you owe an explanation to your husband.” Anna smiled at you. You chuckled as Gavin’s brow raised in confusion.
“Gavin, last week i went for a check up and the doctor wanted to revealed the gender of our baby.” you began. Gavin’s confusion was getting doubled. “Wait, you did? How come i didn’t know?” Gavin asked.
“You were so busy on the mission. So, i asked Anna to get it for me. I want us to know the gender of our baby at the same time. That’s why they come today.” you answered.
“But then i thought of an idea to make it extra!” Kiki said with an excitement.
“That is to buy the cake with the color of your baby’s gender.” Willow added, as excited as Kiki.
“Yes! Blue for boy. Pink for girl.” Minor said.
“Thus, i want you to open the box together. After that i’ll give you the print out of the ultrasound.” Anna said.
You and Gavin looked at each other. Gavin stood up and brought the box to your lap. Both of your and his hands are untying the white ribbon on the box and opened it. You held your breath and as you saw the color.
Pink.
You turned to see Gavin and the man also turned his head at you. Gavin didn’t waste anytime to hug and kiss your forehead, your cheek. You giggled as you could feel the palm of his hand was sweating and he was trembling. But both of you were smiling, even Gavin laughed. The kind were he was so nervous and relieved at the same time.
“Congratulation for both of you. You’ll have a baby girl.” Anna congratulated them.
Watching Gavin’s face, letting almost all of his guard down in front of others by smiling a lot with spark in his eyes, you smiled back at him.
It was your monthly check up with your obstetrician and Gavin, for the first time accompany you. It wasn’t like he didn’t want to, it was because he only got some free time from his shift in police station so he decided to came. You were familiar with ultrasound, but it was new for Gavin so he was holding your hand tightly as the doctor put jelly on your stomach and put the transducer on it.
“So this is her heartbeat.” the doctor stopped the transducer on your belly, and with her other hand she tapped the ultrasound machine and both you and Gavin could hear the heartbeat.
Lub-dub
Lub-dub
You stared at Gavin. The man was staring at the screen with a spark in his amber eyes. He was excited. He was smiling all the time, holding your hand tighter and listen to the doctor had to say. He nodded, turned serious. It seriously made your heart warm to see him like that.
“Y/N? why’re you staring?” Gavin’s sudden question turned you back to reality. You shook your head, smiling at him.
“I always know you’ll be a good dad.” you said, earning a blush on Gavin’s cheek to his earlobe.
Both you and the doctor chuckled.
Third trimester
“How is it? Better?” Gavin asked as he massaged your feet.
You hummed in approval, closing your eyes in content at Gavin’s calloused hands massaging the pad of your feet. Being in 8th month of pregnancy, your feet began to hurt easily as your belly got bigger. Your back also ache a lot. Gavin, being as understanding as ever, everytime he got home he would massaged your back and your feet.
“Oh, Gavin, do you mind?” you asked Gavin.
Gavin stopped massaging your back. “Now?” Gavin asked back. You nodded. Gavin ruffled your hair as he stood up and walked out from the bedroom. Not even a minute he came back with a guitar in his hand. You smiled at him as he sat beside you on the bed. He began to play the same song he did back in your first trimester. You hummed along with him as you already memorized the melody.
“Ah!” you yelped as you felt something in your stomach. Gavin stopped and put away the guitar, he was visibly worried as it was 1 month left for your due date.
“Are you okay? What’s wrong?” Gavin asked. You shook your head.
“I was surprised. A kick.” you let out a chuckle. Before Gavin could ask more you took his hand and placed it on your belly. Gavin’s eyes got soften as he could feel soft movement in your belly. Gavin caressed your belly softly and somehow the baby in your stomach moved along with his hand.
“She likes you playing guitar to her.” you giggled.
“Oh? You do?” Gavin was smiling, talking to your belly. “I promise i will play the song to you a lot when you’re born. But don’t surprise your mom like that.”
“I’m sure she’ll like it.” you caressed Gavin’s hair.
Birth
You groaned in agony as you wait in the hospital bed. Your water broke earlier today when you were cooking for breakfast. Gavin was away on his mission so he couldn’t come with you. You were so glad you could call Anna and she hurriedly call an ambulance for you and accompany you to the hospital. As for Gavin, it was part of his protocol to turn off his cellphone cause he was on mission, but you already left a message for him.
Giving birth without Gavin was expected, due to his job. But it still made you sad. You wanted him to be by your side, and he said the same thing as well when you discussed with him about the possibility of you giving birth alone. Well, rather than having him accompany you, all you wanted was for him to come back home safely. You were brought to the delivery room and Anna waited outside, just in case Gavin came.
(Gavin’s POV)
Gavin was just arrived from his mission. Today’s mission took his team faster than he expected to finish, and for Gavin to only have minor new scars on his arms. He was just finished taking shower in the HQ. He took his phone from his locker and found a message from you. His heart beat faster when he saw your name but then the door to the locker room suddenly opened, revealing Eli.
“Gavin, call from hospital. Your wife’s water--” before Eli could finish, Gavin already grabbed his bag and ran as fast as he could.
It was probably Gavin’s best record of flying from STF HQ to the Loveland hospital. He flew as fast as he could even if it was cloudy, landed smoothly on the nearby empty parking lot and ran into the hospital building. When he found Anna was waiting outside, he was panting.
“Y/N huff huff...how’s...huff huff she?” Gavin asked.
Anna smiled at Gavin and she didn’t need to answer as the two of them could hear your voice from inside the delivery room. Anna approached another door beside the delivery room and a nurse came out. “Her husband’s here. Can he go in?” Anna asked. The nurse eyed at Gavin, she nodded and let Gavin in.
“Sir, you may accompany your wife but please wear these.” the nurse said. She gave a surgical gown for Gavin to wear, a surgical mask and a slipper for him. Gavin nodded, didn’t hesitate anytime to wear the gown and changed his shoe to the slipper. Gavin followed the nurse to the door connected to the delivery room.
When Gavin saw you, he immediately came closer and grabbed your hand tightly in his. You looked sideway to see him, half of his face covered in surgical mask. Tears of relieved streaming out of your eyes. “You’re back.” you said.
Gavin intertwined his fingers in yours as he nodded. “I’m sorry, i’m late.” Gavin said. You smiled at him.
Not long after that you held Gavin’s hand tight it might left marks, but Gavin didn’t care. You screamed, trying your best to give birth to your baby. Gavin kept chanting “Breathe. Breathe. It’s okay. You’re doing good. It’s okay. You can do this.” to your ear despite him also worried about you. Gavin couldn’t really remember what happened after that but he could hear the doctor said “Baby’s here!” followed with a crying voice. Your hand went limp in his grip but you were smiling.
“You did it. You did it. It’s okay now.” Gavin said, smiling. You nodded, closing your eyes.
“Sir, please wait outside. We will call you once we’re done.” a nurse tapped Gavin’s shoulder. Gavin nodded. When he let go of your hand, it fell down limply.
Gavin always said, he could always feel you in the wind. But at that moment, he could feel your life is getting weaker. Along with a little life force Gavin felt minutes ago.
“She’s bleeding too much! Doctor!”
“Get blood transfusion ready!”
“The baby’s choked on amniotic fluid. Prepare the suction!”
“We don’t have much time!”
“Sir, sir, you need to wait outside!”
Before Gavin could even understand what was going on, he was pushed outside by the nurse, even with him still wearing the slipper and surgical gown. Anna came to him, realizing the light on the door turned from green to red. Gavin fell on his knees. His mouth went dry, his hands were trembling.
“Gavin? Gavin, what happened?!” Anna asked.
“She...our child…” Gavin couldn’t even complete any sentence in his head. He could feel his stomach turned upside down, his heart felt like it was ripping inside and it suffocated him. Gavin couldn’t control his evol as his anxiety building up inside him. Gavin was choked by his own evol.
“Sheesh, what a troublesome brother you are. Control yours properly.”
Gavin could feel someone was yanking him, pulling him to stand. Gavin opened his eyes, trying to breathe in air. He glanced to his side, finding someone stood beside him. White shirt, black leather jacket. Purple hair. Amber eyes identical to his.
“...Shaw.” Gavin said weakly, didn’t find any energy to be hostile toward the purple haired man.
“Control yours or that Eli will hunt you down. Even dad will.” Shaw repeated, his face wasn’t like his usual, mocking. He was serious.
Gavin yanked his arm away from Shaw. But his own body betrayed him. He was still shaking. “What do you know? She and my child--”
Shaw let out an exasperated sigh. He rolled his eyes. “Is your faith for her and your baby that slim?” he retorted. Gavin stunned. “You’re the one who can sense her life force.” he added.
Shaw was right. Gavin tried to concentrate once again and, Shaw was right, he could feel the two life, it’s faint, but it’s there.
“Now that my work here is done, i gotta go. Before dad finds out.” Shaw put his hand in his jeans’ pocket.
“Why do you come anyway?” Gavin asked.
Shaw made a thinking pose, hands in his chin while he looked up at the ceiling. Then he laughed, a mocking one. “You might need help to beat some sense to your head.” Shaw smirked, but then he got closer to Gavin’s ear, “And to stop you from getting your evol out of control and end up killing everyone here, including yourself.”
Before Gavin could say anything, Shaw already walked away from him, waving his hand. “Yes, brother. You’re most welcome.” he said.
But Gavin did mouthed “thank you” behind his little brother’s back.
***
Gavin stared at the nurse placing the baby in his hand. His baby. Gavin was never held a baby in his life so he was scared that he might drop her. After assurance from the nurse, Gavin held the baby on his own. The baby was sleeping, breathing, and Gavin couldn’t help but fell on his knees once again. The nurse was about to took the baby from him but Gavin held the baby close to him. To his chest. His whole body shook uncontrollably as tears streaming out from his eyes. He tried to stifled his sobs.
Gavin was glad. He really was glad that his baby was alive. Her cheek flushed red, breathing evenly. Gavin couldn’t help but cry at the sight. As Gavin wiped his tears away, his daughter opened her eyes for the first time and it was gavin’s first time to see a baby’s eyes, staring at him. She shared his eye’s color. Golden amber.
“...thank you...thank you for coming to this world.” Gavin held his baby tight. “I’ll protect you, always. I won’t let anything, anyone, harm you.”
“Mr Gavin? I’m sorry but you need to go back.” the nurse said to him. Gavin nodded slowly, his tears still flowing out from his eyes.
Gavin stood up and gave the baby to the nurse. The nurse smiled warmly at him, knowing what Gavin went through several hours ago. As she rocked the baby she said, “I’ll bring your baby to your wife’s room, Sir. For now, go and meet your wife.” Gavin nodded.
***
Gavin opened the door to your room to find you were already awake, sitting leaning to the bed. Gavin practically slammed the door shut behind him and ran to you. He pulled you to his chest, hugging you.
“G-Gavin...can’t breathe…” you pat Gavin’s back.
Gavin immediately released the hug, cupping your cheek. You frowned when you saw his puffy red eyes. “Gavin, did you cry?” you asked. Gavin opened his mouth but nothing came out. He was glad, so glad to see you alive. You waited for him, for Gavin to stop panting.
“I...i was scared. I was scared that you’d leave. That our baby would leave.” Gavin managed to say. The flash of image seeing you turned pale and several conversation between the doctor and the nurse came back to his mind. Gavin was shivering, his whole body shook.
“Gavin…” you said softly.
“I was scared and it suffocates me. It was really, really hard to breathe when i couldn’t sense you...even if you were there in front of me. I…” Gavin was cut off by you hugging him, as tight as you could considering your weak state right now.
“I...couldn’t think. Everything went blank.” Gavin finally let go of his defense and cry. His sobs were painful for you to hear, it broke your heart.
“I don’t wanna lose you. I don’t wanna lose our baby. I’m sorry...i--” Gavin went powerless in your hug. Your body were still cold, not to his liking, but you were slowly getting warmer. You cupped Gavin’s face in your hand, wiping the tears away from his amber eyes. Gavin closed his eyes, overwhelmed with feeling relieved.
“But we’re here, aren’t we?” you asked. Gavin nodded.
A soft knock at your room and the nurse came in with your baby. You smiled, thanking the nurse as she helped you to hold the baby in your arms. Your eyes met your daughter’s eyes. Your smile went even wider and it made Gavin smiled along with you too. The nurse excused herself and left you along with your baby and Gavin after explaining and show to you how to breastfed the baby.
“Look, Gavin, she has your eyes.” you said, glancing at Gavin. Gavin chuckled, wiping his tears’ trace on his cheek.
Gavin held out his finger and the little girl of his immediately caught his finger and gripped it tight in her tiny arms, looking at Gavin with her big doe amber eyes. Gavin automatically smiled. You giggled, seeing how soft Gavin’s expression was when he tried to move his hand but the baby still gripped it tight. Gavin caressed his daughter’s head while his other hand placed on your shoulder, pulling you to lend on his chest.
“I told you that i will always protect you, no matter what happen, right?” Gavin asked. You nodded.
“Now i have another one to protect.” Gavin kissed the top of your head. “I will always protect both of you, no matter what happens.” Gavin said, leaning his head to yours. You hummed. “But you need to protect yourself too, okay? You’re the one who have the most dangerous job compared to me.” you kissed Gavin’s cheek.
Gavin closed his eyes. “Yes, of course i will. So that i can come back home to see both of you.”
2 months later
Gavin was walking with a bucket of flowers in his hand. It had been a long time since he came to this place. Where his mother sleeps for the last time. Graveyard. He almost never want to come this place. Gavin always avoided cemetery, even if you asked. It reminded of bad childhood he had when his mother died. How cold his father was.
But this time, Gavin didn’t come alone. You were walking beside him, holding your daughter in your arms, sleeping. Gavin was finally ready to face his mother, even if it took years for him to come.
A little promise Gavin told to himself before you gave birth to Anya, your daughter. That he would want to bring you along and Anya to his mother’s grave. You, of course supported him and told him that you were glad to see him finally open up to his past and decided to visit his mother’s grave again.
But in front of Gavin’s mother’s tombstone, there was someone else standing in front of it. The purple hair Gavin knew well. Gavin’s eyebrow knitted in confusion finding Shaw, his brother in their mother’s tombstone. Who would’ve expected that punk man to visit the mother’s grave whom he barely remembered?
“Huh? Isn’t that--” you trailed of. “Shaw..my brother.” Gavin nodded.
Shaw must’ve heard that Gavin was mentioning his name because he turn around to see Gavin and you. He was almost emotionless, but upon seeing Gavin, his lips immediately turned into a smirk and he said something to the tombstone and turned around, walked away before Gavin could even say anything to him.
“Why’s he here?” you asked.
Gavin shook his head. “I don’t know. I’m also surprised how he knows mother’s grave. He was small back then, and i attended the funeral alone.” Gavin replied. You couldn’t answer but nodded your head. You’ve heard about Shaw--you didn’t know if it was his alias name but then it was obvious that he was Gavin’s brother. They shared almost same face feature and identical golden amber eyes. Though Shaw was more into mocking and making fun rather than Gavin who was cold and aloof.
You were sure it won’t be the last time you’d see Shaw.
Gavin put his hand on your shoulder when he found his mother’s tombstone. It was clean maintained well, despite years Gavin never came. Gavin took a deep breath and began to talk. Asking how his mother’s been. Apologized for not coming sooner. Telling how his life now, his job, you, both of your marriage, and then, finally Anya.
Your heart swelled watching Gavin placed his hand on your back as he talked, bit felt like being introduced to your mother in law. Gavin took Anya from your hand and held it in his arm.
“Mom, don’t worry. I’m fine here. I finally find my happiness and i will protect them with all i have.”
A/N : Probably the longest fanfic i’ve wrote for Gavin so far. I do hope i did Shaw justice as he’s not canon to be Gavin’s brother yet, but the hints are everywhere (if you read the spoilers)