With happiness comes fear (my inner most thoughts and fears)
I'm happy now. Honestly I've smiled more in the last few weeks than I have im the last 8 months. I have a problem though. I'm scared. so incredibly scared! You see, nothing good ever lasts in my life. Sooner or later all the good things turn bad and im left with that familiar feeling of misery. I don't want to lose her. My life finally feels like it should, I finally feel like I should. I don't want that to change, but it always changes and im so afraid. I'm afraid I'll do something to mess this up. I'm afraid she'll realize that im not a great as she thought or that I've got to much baggage. I'm afraid my insecurities will drive her away. All I can say is im going to do everything in my power to keep her happy and keep her mine. We both have rough pasts, but sometimes the two people with the saddest pasts can make the happiest future. Still, im terrified...