warnings: light cursing, slight (?) angst??? idk maybe if you squint.
a/n: i love when i get ghost9 requests! thank you so much for sending this in anon!
i wrote this while listening to honey by boy pablo <3 i hope you enjoy
lazy days with suhyun were rare, so when one did come along, you made the most of it. you knew he was tired from everything he had going on- comebacks, tours, recordings- and you wanted nothing more than to see your boyfriend rest.
that brought you to where you were now, laying beside him on his bunk. the bed was small, but you two didn't mind, as it just brought you two closer together.
you were currently watching a romcom you two had come across on netflix, but neither one of you were paying much attention to it. in fact, you both had just been admiring each other for the last ten minutes. you both cherished moments like this, ones where you could simply be together and not have to worry about anything.
"you're so pretty," you whispered to suhyun, brushing a strand of hair out of his face, "how did i get so lucky?"
"i could ask the same thing," suhyun had a slight blush on his cheeks, "we barely see each other because of me, yet you stick around. i'm definitely the lucky one."
suhyun always had a habit of bringing that up- the fact that you two rarely saw each other because of him and the career he chose. you could tell that he felt bad because of this, but you didn't blame him one bit. none of it was his fault. after all, you two started dating after he made his debut, so you knew what you were getting into. you hated that he blamed himself.
"hey, listen to me," you placed your hand on his cheek, watching as he adjusted his gaze so he was looking at you, "i love being your significant other, okay? i love having you as my boyfriend. ever since the moment i met you, i knew i was in it for the long haul, no matter what. i've never felt like this about anyone before. being apart from you only makes me fall more in love with you. it makes every moment we spend together that much more special. i love you, suhyun."
suhyun was stunned. not only was he very much touched by your words, but you'd said the three words you'd both been too scared to say. after a few seconds, a bright smile broke out onto your boyfriend's lips.
"i love you too, y/n." he finally spoke, "i don't think i'll ever get tired of saying that."
a grin formed on your lips as you kissed him softly, "like i said, i'm so lucky."
{gifs aren’t mine! credit goes to original owners}
a/n: i’m quite new to this group, but the lack of tumblr content was killing me so i decided to make some :)
[junhyung]
-from what I’ve seen, he is the kind of guy who just melts at somewhat cute things
-so when you fell asleep on his lap at the dorms, his mind went “uwuakwisdflsjs”
-ok so he’s basically more in love with you now b/c you’re so cute
-lmao he’s whipped
[dongjun]
-okay first off, god has his favorites and it is dongjun
-like junhyung, he’d be in love
-i feel like he’s the type to brush your hair away from your face just so he can admire you
-so once you fell asleep on his shoulder, he smiled and just stared at you, forgetting that the members were also in the room with him
-”ew he’s being all lovey-dovey with y/n again”
-”shhhh..let them sleep”
-pls im so whipped for this man
[shin/suhyun]
-shin my boi, loml
-okay i see him as the type of boyfriend who’d put his jacket/blanket around you
-when you fell asleep on his lap, he legit giggled and then bent down to kiss your forehead
-like the others, he is basically whipped
-takes pictures of you both, makes it his lockscreen (so that all his worries disappear when he turns his phone on)
[kangsung]
-from the kangsung content i’ve seen, he seems pretty playful and somewhat extroverted?
(idk pls don’t come at me, i’ve only stanned them for a few days)
-you fell asleep on his shoulder, so he took his blanket and wrapped it around you also
-basically cuddles you and rests his head on yours (assuming y’all have somewhat similar heights)
-just the most wholesome, cutest moment
-takes pictures of you sleeping so he can brag and tease you
-he loves you nonetheless
[junseong]
-ok he’s already in love but he really just fell in love more
-falling asleep on his lap overall just made him blush and giggle
-definitely the type to play with your hair
-very sweet
-also the type to internally scream
-falls asleep watching you
[prince]
-prince has a heart of gold, he’s so so sweet
-okay so you’d fall asleep on his jacket and he’d fall asleep next to you
-since he’s part of the maknae line- most likely will be teased about it when he wakes up
-no but in all seriousness, he would probably offer you his plushie before falling asleep next to you
[woojin]
-ngl i’m whipped
-i see him as the type to get a marker and draw lil heart shapes on you
-he wouldn’t draw on your face bc your sleeping face is too precious but arm? yes. hand? yes.
-he’d also take a picture of you with his drawings, making it his lockscreen
-brags to the members that he has you
-points out drawings once you wake up
-ends up in a tickle fight
[taesung]
-my mint choco boy
-he’s such a genuinely considerate guy
-falling asleep on each other has become a regular thing between you two
-if you’re tired, he’ll give you a piggyback ride home
-bonding over sleep
-takes pictures and shows them to the members, you, the manager, basically anyone who has eyes
-thinks you look cutest when you’re asleep with your hair messy
[jinwoo]
-he’s so cute
-watching you fall asleep next to him gives him time to admire your features
-puts a blanket around you so you’re not cold
-very shy when you wake up on his shoulder
-very cute and wholesome moment overall
-gets teased (a lot)
a/n: this was actually so fun ahhh i hope you like it!! I’m not the best writer but I tried. Also, can someone tell me if Ghost9 has a fandom name yet?
“can we cross that line?” or how ghost9 would confess to a friend
kangsung
i feel like kangsung wouldn’t be the type to confess to a friend unless he really liked them + were really close to them
he needs to be 100% sure that he likes you and not the idea of you because he’s smart like that
clocks his single brain cell into overdrive to figure it out ASDJHFBNJSFD
it’s not until u do something so mundane but so you that he realizes “ah yes. i would enjoy seeing y/n like this in their most comfortable moments for the rest of my life”
to which he’ll ask, without a second thought:
“are you free saturday night?”
AND THEN, HE’LL GET EMBARRASSED ASDGFBHADSF
he just cannot believe he asked u SO CASUALLY
but thankfully, since u are ever-so-gracious, you take pity on him
“yeah. wanna hang? or,,, go on a date?”
kangsung thinks he’s slick about his crush but he is absolutely not.
jinwoo
omg PLS he would confess to u and try to ask u on a date using SCHOOL AS AN EXCUSE
BOY HAS NO GAME, I’M SO SORRY ADGVFHBDSNJ
the whole “hey,, wanna study together for our english test thursday?” SHEBANG NOOOOOO
probably got that TERRIBLE advice from his hyungs HNGGGGGGG
but it’s ok,,, he’s so cute and sweet and shy about it that u can’t say no (not that u wanted to anyway)
afterwards, homeboy would literally say something like:
“i’ll walk you home,,, if u want,,,, it’s late and it’s dangerous when it’s dark, u never know what’s lurking and—”
pls just,,, shut him up by agreeing
when u get to ur doorstep, u’ll have to say something
just hit him with that:
“i like you too. you don’t have to be so afraid”
and watch him die
shin
nahnahnah, listen to me, LISTEN TO ME
he would 10000% flirt with you and u flirting back with him jokingly only adds fuel to the fire
IT MAKES HIM THINK “hehehe they like me back” AND THEN HE FORGETS THAT HE HASN’T ACTUALLY OFFICIALLY CONFESSED TO U
will not realize it until YOU call him out
“U HAVEN’T EVEN ASKED ME OUT PROPERLY, U BITCH”
and shin, being shin, will yell back
“WELL LET’S GO ON A DATE”
and then u will have to keep that same energy because he just has that influence over u
“FINE, LET’S GO”
“7 PM, I’LL PICK U UP, WE CAN CATCH THAT NEW MOVIE”
“GREAT, SEE YOU THEN”
“SEE YOU THEN!!!”
the reality of the situation only sinks in AFTER u guys part
sinks to his knees the moment he arrives back at the dorms and wheezes:
"ᵒʰ ᵐʸ ᵍᵒᵈ ᶦ'ᵐ ᵍᵒᶦⁿᵍ ᵒⁿ ᵃ ᵈᵃᵗᵉ ʷᶦᵗʰ ʸ/ⁿ"
dongjun, under his breath: fucking finally
junhyung
he would be such a nice guy, PLEASEEE
AND NOT THE BAD KIND, THE GOOD KIND
seems like the guy every girl would have a crush on solely because of how reliable and trustworthy he is
even if his friends clown him all the time ASDJFDS
I MEAN, ESPECIALLY SINCE HIS FRIENDS CLOWN HIM ALL THE TIME, IT’S A WONDER HOW HE HASN’T STRANGLED ONE OF THEM YET
but also he would give u such mixed signals prior to confessing .
it’s like ?? he’s nice but is he just being nice because he’s nice to everyone or because he likes u???
is he extra nice to u to show his interest or are u imagining it????
EVEN IF U DON’T HAVE A CRUSH ON HIM INITIALLY, TRYING TO FIGURE OUT IF HE LIKES YOU ENDS UP MAKING U FALL IN LOVE
he probably confesses after having to pretend to be ur boyfriend to get u out of an uncomfortable situation
sees a guy hitting on u and u looking around to try and find any means of escape?
will IMMEDIATELY swoop in and say something terribly cliche like, “hey babe, who’s this?” HNGNGNGNGNGNNGNGNG GET ME OUT OF HERE
it’s only when you say:
“thanks for pretending to be my boyfriend,,,”
that he drops the bomb:
“it doesn’t have to be pretend?”
let’s just say his arm is around ur waist the entire rest of the night (and not just to ward off any creeps)
taeseung
similarly to shin, u guys are like dating but not dating
literally no one else will go out with taeseung at 1 in the morning when he gets peckish besides u, so u are already wifey material to him AJSHDFBANDSKJ
PLEASE, ur whole friendship is based around food
but it’s great because u guys have bonded so much LMFAOOOO
he’d confess during one of ur Late Night Convenience Store Food Runs because he, for whatever reason, gets an epiphany
u are literally just eating, scrolling on ur phone and telling him about whatever’s on ur mind, when he thinks:
“hm,,, i’m like, in love with u”
so he says
“i’m in love with u”
very profound and eloquent, i know
and u would just look up slowly with the most incredulous face because:
“i know, you stupid bitch. anyways, look at this tiktok”
confession success ???
woojin
i feel like,,,, i feel like he’d rather die than confess AJSHDFHAJSDBFJASHKF
NOT BECAUSE HE’S LIKE “oooh i’m so afraid that this person won’t like me back” BUT IT’S MORE LIKE “i’m too cool for this shit”
it’s the “i like you, you like me” situation, ykwim
and he’s gonna wait as long as humanly possible for YOU to confess first
HE’S SO COCKY WHEN U FINALLY DO TOO, LIKE HEL L L O O O O O O OO ????
“oh, is that so? :]”
SMUG BASTARD, U AREN’T OIKAWA BITCH
ur almost about to take it back and stomp away jokingly, BUT
he’ll grab ur wrist and turn u back around like it’s a fucking kdrama HNGNGNGNGNGNGNGNG
AND HE’LL LOOK U DIRECTLY IN THE EYES BECAUSE HE’S A LITTLE SHIT LIKE THAT AND SAY SOMETHING SMOOTH LIKE
“keep your friday night free”
U ALREADY KNOW HE PRACTICED THIS IN THE MIRROR THE NIGHT BEFORE, BUT U CAN’T EVEN TEASE HIM ABOUT IT BECAUSE UR SO FLUSTERED
lee woojin,,,,,, lee woojin. what else can be said
junseong
sometimes, being friends with junseong feels more like having a small child and he ABSOLUTELY knows that
he’s probably tried to confess to u so many times, but u always spin it like a little kid having a crush on a grown-up
even tho u guys are the same age AJSBFJSDNHSDJ
u drive junseong nuts and not always in a good way LOOOOOOOOOOL
but it’s ok because (๑•̀ㅂ•́)و✧ HE WON’T GIVE UP
he’s gonna show u that he’s grown!! and a man!!!!
“a man who can’t order at restaurants?”
“I CAN!! I JUST,,, DON’T WANT TO!!!!!”
it’s not until he does something unintentionally heart-stealing that u see him a new light
u guys would be out on a walk, something u two always do when his schedule allows
and some jerk cycler would almost run u over but junseong ~saves the day~
“that guy should’ve watched where he was going,,,”
he’d mumble this while his eyes were glued on the cycler zooming away, all while he’s HOLDING U TO HIS CHEST
IT’S SO CASUAL AND SO NOT LIKE HIS ATTEMPTS AT MAKING A MOVE ON U IN THE PAST AND UR ???? U ARE ??????
“do you still wanna go on a date with me?”
when i say junseong’s eyes light up, they LIGHT UP
junseong - 1, giving up - 0
prince
gets too shy to confess so he acts like the date he’s taking u on is just a regular friendly hangout session NOOOOOO PRINCE HAVE SOME CONFIDENCE
but hey, at least u get to spend a whole day in the city with the sweetest boy in town :’)))
and obviously ur aware of his feelings but u never wanted to assume anything, ya know?
so u don’t tease him about it or even bring it up really
it’s only when u catch him looking at you out of the corner of your eye when u realize that he really has it bad for you
initiate operation: “MAKE PRINCE GET A CLUE”
u’d grab his hand when u guys move through big crowds because, “i don’t want to get separated :(((“ and when u see a store ur interested in
just ANY chance u get to be touchy, u would
and u see him being all flustered but he still won’t admit it’s a date
just pls spare him
“today was fun. let’s go on another date sometime, okay?”
prince’s confession mission was a success, but,,, was it really ?? AJSHDKFJBDS
dongjun
mr. “i live and breathe and eat music” is so emotionless sometimes that u can’t even tell if he considers u a friend ADHFBJDS
but he willingly asks u to hangout and stuff so he must, right?
right??? AJSHDFBJAJSFNAKSDBJFNAKSDJF
and he even trusts u enough to ask for ur opinion on his songs, so he must enjoy ur presence,,,,,
that’s probably how he’d confess too ASJDHFHDS
he’d play a cheesy, cheesy feel-good love song about how the person he likes makes him feel, all the little things that he loves about them, and afterwards u’d be like:
“wow,,, what’s got u so in love haha,,,,,”
and ur hurting JUST A BIT because U like dongjun and how could HE like someone else but also that’s completely valid bc it’s his feelings BUT STILL, UR HEARTBROKEN
for all of 3 seconds because dongjun deadpans to u and says:
“it’s you. i’m in love with you. do u feel the same.”
IT’S NOT EVEN A QUESTION AT THIS POINT ADJHFKBJDS
just say yes, say YES AJSHHFDBJDSKF
author’s note: i’m still not officially writing on tumblr again but i am just spewing all my thoughts in the form of fics LOOOOOOL. anyways not junhyung’s being so long and me claiming he isn’t my one of my biases, ok anna u tell urself that.
tagging: @too-becontinued because they asked hehehe
your hand throbs, almost completely numb after kangsung forced u to ice it for god knows how long
u can’t even feel him holding ur hand rn wtf <(｀^´)>
u don’t even understand why he’s being so upsetti right now
ok no u definitely understand, u knocked a guy clean out, BUT STILL
IT WAS JUST 1 SMALL FIGHT !!
,, in which u busted ur knuckles BUT STILL
“that guy shouldn’t have fucked with you”
u shrug, which seems to spur kangsung’s anger on more
(but he looks cute when he’s mad, so u don’t mind :’))))
“AND U SHOULDN’T HAVE PUNCHED HIM!!!”
u hate the fact that kangsung is probably right
but u were hyped up on late-night convenience store food (which is when it tastes the best, btw) and HE was being a dick!!!
“he shoved you, ‘sung”
“and you knocked him out! plus, you promised me no more fights!!”
,,,, HMPH U RECALL NO SUCH THING
nope, u don’t remember kangsung crying his little heart out after a trip to the hospital and choking out, “please stop doing this” in-between sobs, no siree
,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,, OK FINE MAYBE U REMEMBER
and u do feel bad about it, don’t get it twisted
but throwing a punch is just an impulse now and it’s a wonder how u’ve gone 3 months without doing it
WILLPOWER BABEY!!!!!!
i mean, u never lose a fight (even if u do get a little fucked up in the process), so why not !!!
LEE KANGSUNG IS WHY NOT
u have a cute boyfriend to worry about your safety now
that’s never happened before,,, BUT U DIGRESS
SOME GUY KNOCKED INTO KANGSUNG AND GOT A LITTLE TOO THREATENING FOR UR LIKING, SO U CAME TO HIS RESCUE AND THREW A PUNCH, SO WHAT !!!
so now u feel guilty, THAT’S WHAT
an apology forms on your tongue, but
your stubborn ass can’t seem to get it out
that, and u can’t take your eyes off of kangsung’s movements
he moves so swiftly, nimble fingers carefully cleaning up the blood that’s dotted on your knuckles
it’s like he’s done this a million times before, which he probably has since you came into his life
you can tell he’s being more gentle now that you’ve whined about it, regardless of the fact that he’s still clearly angry at you
his non-dominant hand holds your injured one in place, and u take the chance to squeeze it
your breath hitches in your throat when he looks up at you
he’s tired, you know
the weariness in his eyes says it all
you dragged him out at midnight because you wanted food and now he has to clean up your mess
you fucked up big time, huh?
“i’m sorry. i didn’t mean to…”
didn’t mean to what?
you meant it when you threw that punch
and you meant it when you told that guy you’d put him in the hospital if he didn’t back up from kangsung
“i didn’t mean to hurt you”
you finally breathe out
it feels like the aching in your heart has finally overshadowed the throbbing your hand because it’s all you can feel right now
kangsung’s head tilts forward to lean against your chest, and you wonder if he can hear it pounding
“you didn’t hurt me”
but you know he’s lying
“i did. i shouldn’t have broken our promise. it wasn’t right of me”
he’s silent for a while, thumb smoothing over the bandage he’s put over your knuckles
you don’t have heart-to-heart talks often (because ur a coward with emotional constipation), but this right now is familiar
kangsung falling into you, you holding him
or maybe, he’s holding you
but no matter what, you two are together, sinking in the comfortable silence, and you almost feel invincible
“it wasn’t right of you”
kangsung huffs, peeling his forehead off of your shirt
he stares up at you with a frown, but it’s more of a pout than anything
u resist the urge to kiss it off his face
but u don’t because he has more to say
“you’re a big jerk for breaking our promise and i’m still mad at you for that. one of these days, you’re gonna get seriously hurt or arrested, you know?”
u wince, suddenly unable to meet his eyes
he’s right and ur pride will NOT allow u to accept it
u wanna tell him that ur Too Cool 4 Jail, but u think he’ll kick u out of his house ASDFHBSDF
jk u know he loves u too much but u don’t wanna terrorize him more than u already have
“but... i know you were just trying to protect me, so… thanks, you idiot”
kangsung leans forward again, but this time, he buries his face in the crook of your neck
for the first time ever, you feel at a loss for words, something ur sharp tongue seldom experiences
but kangsung,,, he’s different
he takes your breath, your words, your everything away
it’s easy to let him
“i worry about you all the time. sometimes, when you text me goodnight later than usual, i wonder if you got hurt again but didn’t want me to know. i know you do that”
you flinch when you feel his lips press against your neck in a fleeting kiss, but you relax immediately
he knows ur ticklish >:(((
“but i can’t leave you, ever. and i don’t want to. as long as you keep trying, it’s fine. you’ll do that for me, right?”
your words rush back to you in an instant, no matter how dry your throat feels
“i’ll do anything for you”
you croak, heat spreading across your cheeks
u,,,, u are so whipped
and u realize u are MEGA whipped when u burn up even more at the sound of kangsung’s breathy laughter
it warms your bare skin and it makes you pull him closer to you
“stay the night.”
he whispers, head resting on your shoulder now
it takes a little effort, but u turn to look at him
and when you do, you come to another realization
kangsung is just in love with you as you are him
even after you’ve been a terrible s/o tonight, he’s looking at you so fondly, warmly
you’re no angel, but the way kangsung looks at you might make you believe otherwise
which is just so ridiculous
if anyone’s the angel in this relationship, it’s him
the patience, the tenderness, the love he has for someone like you who thinks of themselves as utterly unlovable
if you’ve died and met kangsung as a result, you don’t think you ever want to live again
“where else would i go?”
author’s note: i really said if i can’t read any kangsung fics, i’ll make them myself huh. i considered writing this concept for another member but my mind kept going back to kangsung LMFAOOOOOOO anyways kangsung pls scold me but also tell me how much u love me at the same time, thank u
you were going to go to school, drag yourself through all of your classes, and then go home to sleep
it’s what you’ve been doing every single day since senior year started
and today was no exception until it was
“your hair makes you look like a cute fairy and i wanna know if it’s as soft as it appears!”
u look up from where you’re sat on the ground, hyperaware of the crowd of students gathered around you
u were trying to rush to your next period, but of course
OF COURSE u had to bump into LEE KANGSUNG, THE PRETTIEST AND MOST MYSTERIOUS BOY IN SCHOOL
AND WHY DID U BLURT THAT OUT ???
LIKE YEAH, IT’S TRUE, U DO THINK HIS HAIR MAKES HIM LOOK LIKE A CUTE FAIRY, BUT ?!?!?!??!?!?!?!?!?!
WHY DID U SAY IT OUT LOUD ???????????
NOW NOT ONLY DOES UR ASS HURTS FROM FALLING ON THE GROUND BUT UR PRIDE IS ALSO WOUNDED
U HAVE NEVER BEEN SO EMBARRASSED IN UR LIFE
AND THE WAY KANGSUNG STARES DOWN AT YOU IN COMPLETE SHOCK, JUST BLINKING AND MOUTH AGAPE LIKE HE DOESN’T KNOW WHAT TO SAY
UR GONNA FUCKING DIE
UR GONNA D I E D I E
u cannot believe this is the first time u utter any word to this guy and it’s this HUMILIATING
u have to get out of here
U HAVE TO LEAVE N O W W W W W
before kangsung can collect his thoughts (u don’t blame the poor guy for taking a while), u pick up your textbooks and G O
u don’t even stop when you hear your friend yell your name
you’re too embarrassed to even look back
and u thought u’d be over it by the time u went to bed, but
HOW DO U JUST FORGET SOMETHING LIKE THAT
why did it have to be lee kangsung of all people ｡･ﾟﾟ･(> д <)･ﾟﾟ･｡
he’s the guy at school that every other person has a crush on, which u are NOT EXEMPT FROM
and FINE IT’S NOT A CRUSH CRUSH OK
it’s more like,,,, ur curiosity is piqued!!!
he never lets anyone touch him but is still somehow one of the most popular guys in school
and even though the whole hands-off policy thing makes him seem kind of cold, his cute smile makes up for it
not that u’ve ever seen it up close before,,,,
u two have been in the same grade since middle school and now you’re both seniors
how the HELL have u not talked to him yet
WELL NOW U GUESS U WON’T EVER BE ABLE TO TALK TO HIM
u hide ur face the next day when u go to school even though all ur friends insist that no one will even remember what happened
U REMEMBER AND THAT’S MORTIFYING ENOUGH!!!!!!!
and u manage to avoid kangsung ALL day without even seeing him ONCE, UNTIL
“can i talk to you for a second?”
Σ(,,꒪꒫꒪,,)Σ(,,꒪꒫꒪,,)Σ(,,꒪꒫꒪,,)
how,,,, how did HE FIND U
u purposely went out of the school’s back entrance to go home because no one exits here and yet,,,,
AND YET
LEE KANGSUNG IN ALL HIS FAIRY GLORY IS STANDING BEHIND U RIGHT NOW ASKING TO SPEAK TO U
AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH
WHY DID HE WANNA SEE U ???
IS HE GONNA CHEW U OUT FOR WHAT U SAID YESTERDAY ??????
U CAN ALREADY HEAR HIM NOW
“that made me really uncomfortable and i’d like for you to never speak to me again. don’t even breathe in my direction if you know what’s good for you.”
UR GONNA DIE HOLY SHIT UR GONNA GET MURDERED
“hello? y/n?”
“˚‧º·(˚ ˃̣̣̥⌓˂̣̣̥ )‧º·˚ I’M SORRY”
u slap ur hand over ur mouth as soon as u apologize, not meaning to sound whiny AZSJDFBANJSF
GREAT, NOW HE THINKS UR WEIRD AND AN OVERGROWN CHILD
WHAT ELSE COULD GO WRONG ???
NOW ALL KANGSUNG NEEDS TO DO IS YELL AT U AND UR DAY WILL OFFICIALLY BE 100% RUINED
“actually,,, i wanted to apologize”
,,, (・・)
???(ﾉ)・´ω・(ヾ)
“you,,, what?”
kangsung shifts his weight onto his other foot, glancing to the side like he’s too embarrassed to look u in the eye
and when he purses his lips, shoving his hands into his pockets, u figure that he’s probably uncomfortable
o,,, o no,,,,,,, are U MAKING HIM UNCOMFORTABLE ????
BUT UR JUST STANDING HERE
MAYBE HE DOESN’T LIKE THAT UR LOOKING AT HIM
QUICKLY, U LOOK DOWN AT UR FEET, BUT U REALIZE HOW AWKWARD U TWO MUST LOOK RIGHT NOW
0 EYE CONTACT, 10 FEET AWAY FROM EACH OTHER, JUST IDLING
WHAT THE HELL IS GOING ON
“i’m sorry about yesterday, i mean”
kangsung’s voice thankfully breaks through the silence, BUT ALSO NOT THANKFULLY BECAUSE HE TOTALLY REMEMBERS YESTERDAY’S EVENTS
u feel like that dog in the ‘this is fine’ meme
not u nervous smiling as a defense mechanism, NOT U NERVOUS SMILING AS A DEFENSE MECHANISM!!!
kangsung finds the courage to look at u again before he continues
“listen, what you said when you fell—”
“nononono PLEASE DON’T SAY IT”
u bury your face in your hands, fighting the urge to curl up in a ball right then and there
AND U HATE THE WAY UR EYES STING
WHY DO U ALWAYS WANNA CRY WHEN ANY SORT OF CONFLICT OCCURS IN UR LIFE
“i know what i said was weird and out of line, i won’t ever say it again! i’m sorry, i don’t know why i even said it out loud! if you want me to leave you alone forever, i’ll—!”
“y/n.”
u slowly peek from between your fingers, hands still covering ur surely red face
u think kangsung sees the tears pool in your eyes because his expression softens a bit, eyebrows unfurrowing
his shoulders drop with a sigh
“i’m sorry, i didn’t mean to make you cry. but look, what you said yesterday wasn’t your fault. it was mine”
“꒰๑•̥﹏•̥๑꒱ ur just saying that to make me feel better,,,,”
“no, seriously. don’t tell anyone this, but—”
kangsung cuts himself off, clearly second-guessing his decision to tell u whatever it is he wants to say
but before u can tell him that he doesn’t have to say anything
“i have a condition that forces anyone who touches me to say the truth.”
haha
hahaha
does kangsung think you’re fucking stupid.
“i’m serious! you’ve noticed that i don’t let anyone touch me, right?”
“??? yes, but—”
“it’s because i don’t want what happened yesterday to,,, to happen!”
u don’t want to believe him
WHY WOULD U BELIEVE HIM
but,,, it is weird
u wouldn’t just say something so embarrassing WILLINGLY
so it does explain why u said it,,,,,
BUT STILL
“let me touch you, then!”
???????
NVM MAYBE EVERYTHING U SAY IS JUST EMBARRASSING
U GO TO RETRACT THE HAND U FLUNG OUT TO EMPHASIZE UR REQUEST, BUT IT’S TOO LATE
KANGSUNG IS STRIDING TOWARDS U AND BEFORE U KNOW IT !!!!
“i think you sound kind of crazy right now, but you’re so cute that i can’t even run”
b,,, bro,,,,,,
BRO
WHAT KIND OF A CONDITION IS THIS !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
u feel yourself about to blurt another equally TERRIBLE sentence, but kangsung lets go of your hand
and now, it just sinks in that he’s heard u call him cute twice
WHAT THE FUCK
“do you believe me now?”
“NOT LIKE I HAVE A CHOICE”
HnNnNnNnG WHY DID UR ENTIRE LIFE HAVE TO BE RUINED IN THE SPAN OF 2 DAYS
UR CRUSH NOT CRUSH IS NOW AWARE OF THE FACT THAT U FIND HIM ATTRACTIVE
AND U CAN NEVER FACE THE STUDENT BODY EVER AGAIN IN FEAR THAT WHAT U SAID YESTERDAY WILL STILL BE ON THEIR MIND
FRICK
FRICK !!!!!!!
“lee kangsung, u ruined my life! ｡゜(｀Д´)゜｡”
now u really DO drop to ur knees
fuck this stupid cute boy
FUCK THIS STUPID CUTE BOY!!!
“i’m sorry, i know it was embarrassing, but it’s high school, people won’t remember this in like a month—”
“i will!! i’ll remember this to the day i die and other people are gonna think i’m a creep for wanting to touch your hair even if it’s just for a month!”
u know ur being unfair
BUT U CAN’T HELP IT
U NEED SOMEONE TO BLAME AND CUTE FAIRY BOY OVER HERE IS THE PERFECT CANDIDATE
u hear kangsung sigh again, and GOOD
MAKE THIS FRUSTRATING FOR HIM
UR A BRAT AND HE’LL FEEL UR WRATH
“ok fine, how about this?”
u slowly lift ur gaze from the ground to meet kangsung’s eyes
u realize that he’s gotten on his knees too, definitely dirtying his pants just to match your level
,,, hmph. that’s not cute or sweet at all. IT’S NOT AT ALL!!!
“let’s become friends.”
????
“if we’re friends, then people will think that you were just joking around and no one will think you’re a creep”
????????????
u sniffle, wiping ur eyes on your sleeve, FULLY AWARE of how pitiful u look
SO IT’S LIKE THAT HUH ??? HE’S JUST TAKING PITY ON U ??????
WELL L O O K H E R E L E E K A N G S U N G
“i don’t need your pity friendship”
“y/n, it’s not a pity friendship!”
ur unconvinced .
sounds very much like a friendship made out of pity to u
also, u know this probably should’ve hit u earlier, but
“wait— how do you know my name?”
OK LISTEN
YEAH U GUYS HAVE GONE TO THE SAME SCHOOL FOR YEARS, BUT ???
IT’S NOT LIKE U KNOW EVERYONE’S NAME !!!
“i told you that’s why this isn’t a pity friendship. i’ve—”
a look of,,, pain (??) seems to flash across kangsung’s face as he cuts himself off
he scratches the back of his neck as he glances away once more
and u can’t say for sure, mostly because u don’t want to get ur idiot heart’s hopes up, but a soft pink seems to dust his cheeks
ur abt to slap ur heart right in its left ventricle if it doesn’t SHUT UP
“i’ve wanted to be friends with you for a while, okay? since, like, 8th grade”
your heart stops beating altogether, a complete 180 from the thundering just a few moments ago
h,,, him??
mr. cute and mysterious,,,,, has been yearning for ur friendship for 5 years now ??????
he has to be fucking with u
all his friends must be in this as some SICK TWISTED PRANK OR SOMETHING!!!
but ??? his whole condition thing turned out to be true,,,
u guess he doesn’t really have any reason to lie to u after that,,,,,,,,,,
“fine. then, let’s be friends”
and that’s how u find urself anxiously fiddling with your phone case in the passenger seat of kangsung’s car the next day
ur high school is only 10 minutes away, but WHY DOES IT FEEL LIKE 1234712834
“y/n, relax”
he spares u a glance while trying not to crash the car as he does
god, u don’t know what u did to warrant being put in a TEENAGE BOY’S CAR
NO TEENAGE BOY DRIVES WELL AND THAT’S UNIVERSAL
honestly u don’t know what’ll kill u first
kangsung’s terrible driving or the way he keeps glancing at u from time to time
WHAT’S WORSE IS THAT SINCE UR ALSO GLANCING AT HIM EVERY NOW AND AGAIN, UR EYES KEEP MEETING
AND HE KEEPS BREATHING OUT THIS LITTLE LAUGH WHEN THEY DO!!!
the nerve,,, THE NERVE
abolish all pretty people .
u refuse to be the only one embarrassed right now
“so, 8th grade, huh”
BULLSEYE BABEYYYY
u always know WHERE TO HIT EM
kangsung’s face flushes and u 100% do NOT want to squeeze his cheek right now
maybe instead of a fairy, he’s more like a squirrel
,,, a squirrel with pink hair, BUT ANYWAYS
U JUST THINK HE HAS CUTE PUFFY CHEEKS !! THAT’S A TOTALLY NORMAL THING TO THINK
somehow, u feel even more embarrassed than before
“i thought u were kinda cool, alright,,, jheez,,,,,,”
“cool? me?!”
“yeah! i mean, you just always did whatever you wanted, you know?”
"that’s usually why people hate me”
“that’s why i liked you”
ur breath stops short in your throat
meanwhile, kangsung scrambles to explain himself AJDSFBNHADFMK
“friend-like! friend-like. i admired the way you had no fear, okay? i,, wish i could live like that”
“what do you mean?”
kangsung shrugs his shoulders, leaning back in his seat, waiting for the light to turn green
he taps the wheel with his finger, silent for a little bit before he turned to you
you hate to admit it, but he steals your breath again
“i’m always on-edge because of my condition. i was lucky enough to make friends despite it, but if they ever touched me and said something they regret, i,,, i just don’t want them to get hurt because of me”
he looks away again when the light turns
silence blankets the car as u try to process everything
when kangsung told you about his condition yesterday, you hadn’t really thought too much about it
you were more so still reeling from this whole situation
like, seriously? what kind of anime plot line is this
but,,, you think you understand him a bit more now too
maybe mr. cute and mysterious isn’t so mysterious after all
actually, everything seemed pretty obvious now
why he never dated anyone, why he’s always slightly separated from his group of friends (not that u ever look at him)
the way he lives sounds like a fucking pain
“so,,, what? you keep everyone at arm’s length to protect them?”
“yeah. yeah, exactly”
“why don’t you just tell everyone so they understand?”
“even if i tell people, accidents will happen. it’s just easier for me to burden this on my own”
why is kangsung so,,, considerate?
why is he making life harder for himself?
u think of something that probably isn’t the nicest thing to say to some boy pouring his heart out to you, but
u say it anyway
“that’s stupid”
kangsung sputters for a second, but ur not finished yet
“even if accidents happen, your friends should be understanding. and if they don’t want to be friends with you after you tell them, then they shouldn’t be your friends at all. you told me, didn’t you? and i’m still here”
this time, when the silence returns, it slips between your ribs and squeezes at your heart
u usually hate talking about your feelings or anything cheesy like that, but
it just came out this time,,,
maybe kangsung’s condition has mutated into something airborne (╯•﹏•╰)
“you are”
kangsung breathes it out, more to himself than you
his eyes are locked on the road (as they should), and u’ve never been the best at reading people, but ur pretty sure he’s having an epiphany or something
and u don’t know WHY that spurs u to say this, but
the words leave your mouth before u can think twice
“yeah, i am. and i’ll burden your condition with you”
u have never wanted to slap urself so badly before ASJDFHBASDFNJ
SINCE WHEN HAVE U BECOME LIKE THIS ???
THE Y/N U KNOW WOULD NEVER BE CAUGHT DEAD SAYING THIS SHIT
BUT HERE U ARE
HERE U A R E
kangsung’s face splits into a grin, which does NOT help the heat crawling up your neck
AND IT EXTRA DOES NOT HELP WHEN U TURNS TO LOOK AT U, SMILING AT U DIRECTLY NOW
“what are you doing after school?”
hanging out with him APPARENTLY
u’d normally be home by now, but instead
ur in the school’s dance studio ??? THE FIRST TIME U’VE EVER BEEN HERE IN THE PAST 4 YEARS ??????
IF KANGSUNG KNEW HE HAD PRACTICE, WHY DID HE INVITE U TO HANG
“i’ll take you out to eat after, okay? just stay for now. please?”
(҂⌣̀_⌣́)
“your treat?”
“whatever you want”
,,,, u take everything u said back
kangsung isn’t a fairy or a squirrel, HE’S A PLEADING PUPPY AND HE’S USING HIS CHARM ON U NOW
u SWEAR u don’t have a crush on him, BUT UR FEELINGS ARE STILL HERE DESPITE THE MYSTERY BEHIND HIS BEHAVIOUR SOLVED
HNnNnNnNnG
WHATEVER HIS DANCE TEAM FRIENDS ARE CUTER ANYWAY!!!
u just need to find another boy to become infatuated with
like !! prince! OR SHIN
ANYONE BESIDES KANGSUNG WHO U CAN’T TAKE UR FUCKING EYES OFF OF
u’ve seen him perform a few times at events, but,,, never this close
and never this,,, unrefined?
from ur little corner (where junhyung, the team captain, has so graciously allowed u to stay), u’ve seen kangsung stumble at least twice now, each time with a laugh and a quick readjustment to keep up with the group
on stage, he’s always flawless, not to mention dressed to the nines
right now, he’s just in some old t-shirt and sweatpants, focused on getting the moves right and not splitting his attention between that and looking pretty
but he still looks good anyway, smfh pretty people have it all
for some reason, you feel,,, special
sdhfbds SNAP OUT OF IT
U GUYS ARE JUST FRIENDS, BARELY FRIENDS, U CANNOT CATCH FEELINGS
u physically shake ur head as if that’d rid your brain of its VERY NON-PLATONIC THOUGHTS
but, of course, it doesn’t work
it never does
they’re still swirling around within your skull when kangsung pulls up to the 7/11 near the school, no matter how hard u try to drown them in your 2nd carton of milk
“i thought you were going to take me to an actual restaurant >:((“
“how much money do you think i have?”
“you won’t have any left after i’m done with this place”
kangsung pouts, cheeks puffing out
instinctively, ur finger reaches up to poke one of them (like u do with all your friends), but then u remember, jerking back
ur lips part to apologize, but kangsung beats u to it
“are you sure you wanna be friends with a guy like me?”
“what do you mean a guy like you? you’re sweet and warm-hearted even if i think you’re kind of stupid for only relying on yourself because of your condition. and i’ve been wanting to be your friend for a while too, so i’m not letting you go that easily”
=͟͟͞͞( ω )=͟͟͞͞ ³ ³
underneath the table, u feel kangsung move his leg back
u,,,,
U,,,,, !!
“LEE KANGSUNG, U LITTLE SHIT!!”
“I’M SORRY, I REALLY DIDN’T MEAN TO TOUCH YOU”
“BEG ON YOUR KNEES FOR MY FORGIVENESS!! REPENT!!!! REPENT!!!!!!!!!!”
needless to say, u guys hang out after school again the next day ASDFVHJBASDFNJ
BUT only because kangsung texted u the cringiest shit and for some reason, that convinced u not to murder him
kangsung [11:13 pm]: i’m sorry again for earlier :((
kangsung [11:14 pm]: but i think you’re sweet too
kangsung [11:14 pm]: and warm-hearted if you’re willing to put up with me ://
kangsung [11:15 pm]: i won’t let go of you that easily either, just so you know
u may or may not have screamed into ur pillow a little bit
the world will never know
u don’t know when, but kangsung just,,, managed to weave his way into your daily life and schedule
ur time after school is just always preoccupied with him now, and it feels kind of wrong when it isn’t ASHFBDNJSDF
kangsung even bleeds into your weekends, so much so that ur friends keep teasing u about ur ‘dates’ with him
“we’re literally just hanging out, it’s no big deal”
“IT IS SO A BIG DEAL, L/N Y/N!!”
but now that ur idiot friends have implanted that idea in ur head
U CAN’T UNTHINK IT
ALL U WANNA DO RIGHT NOW IS CRUSH KANGSUNG AT ARCADE BASKETBALL, BUT U CAN’T CONCENTRATE
is this a date?
have u guys been on dates this whole time?
like yeah ok, u guys hang out a lot after school and he even takes u to his dance practices
and he introduced u to his friends too, but isn’t that all stuff friends do???
friends head home together and text and call and ?!?!?!?!??!?!?!
what’s the difference between friendly and romantic gestures???????????
ur head’s going to explode
and NOT JUST BECAUSE A BASKETBALL JUST FLUNG INTO YOUR FACE
HOW DID IT BOUNCE OFF THE RIM SO PERFECTLY ?????
HOW DO U JUST HAVE THE WORST LUCK ???????
“are you okay? can you open your eyes?”
talk about deja vu,,,
ur on your butt again after falling on the ground, but instead of a cute boy being the culprit, it’s an UGLY ORANGE BASKETBALL
but this time, kangsung is here to help instead of gawk, and
you see his hand reach out in slow motion
OK MAYBE NOT SLOW MOTION BUT IT SURE FELT LIKE IT
he’s offering his hand to help you up, something completely mundane and normal for everyone but him
and as if he realizes that too, his hand retreats, apologies tumbling past his lips
“shit, i’m sorry, i got too comfortable with you—”
kangsung,,, seriously apologizes too much
u hear him say sorry at least twice a day, and ur almost sick of it— the way he’s treading so carefully even after you told him he can relax around you
and so, before he can fully pull back, you grab his hand, pulling his upper body down to your level
if u weren’t so fed up, you’d be burning up right now
his face is,,, way too close for this to be platonic anymore
“you have no reason to apologize. if i didn’t like you, i wouldn’t hang out with you every day. so be comfortable— as comfortable as possible around me! reach out to me whenever you want!”
u let go of his hand, pushing yourself up to stand and avoiding his eyes
fuck, kangsung always manages to get u to reveal your true feelings
with or without his condition
he just has one of those faces that make u want to tell him everything and then some
maybe that’s why you feel so compelled to take his hand again when he offers it
the basketball game on your left has long since ended, the LED lights flashing for you to put in another token
but all you can focus on is his fingers reaching out to you, almost desperately, even though you know it’s all in your head
you just can’t help but wonder
has kangsung ever been able to touch another friend so casually like this?
has he been yearning for this kind of warmth his whole life?
,,,,,, you’re dead wrong if you think you can deny him that
your fingers brush against his
“i want to stay with you a little longer”
the smile that lights up kangsung’s face is worth any sort of embarrassment you feel filling your chest
“i want to stay with you too”
you’re not really sure what you guys are now
but you do know that you’re kind of (just a little) crazy over him
MAYBE UR A SIMP, WHATEVER OK!!
HE SIMPS FOR YOU TOO, SO IT’S FINE!!!
MUTUAL SIMPING!!!!
except,,,
“hey, isn’t that kangsung? i thought you two were going out”
u roll your eyes at your friend (who’s waiting for you to grab your books for english next period), ready to tell her that u guys aren’t dating, but then
you catch sight of kangsung down the hall
when your heart nose-dives into your stomach, it isn’t for its usual reason
instead, it sinks there because of the girl kangsung’s talking to
,,,,, fuck
fuck
you know you shouldn’t be jealous
YOU KNOW IT ALREADY, OK, SO SHUT UP
kangsung is his own person and he can talk to whoever he pleases
and you guys aren’t even officially dating yet
come to think of it,,, you’re not even sure if kangsung really likes you like that
maybe,,,,,
maybe he’s just close to you because you’re the only one who knows about his condition
,,,,,,,,
yeah
that must be it
if kangsung really liked you romantically, he wouldn’t be standing so close to that girl
does she know about his condition?
does this mean kangsung doesn’t need you anymore?
,,, UGH WHEN DID U BECOME SO INSECURE
u and kangsung are FRIENDS
friends!!
and you’re the one who told him that you’d help him carry the weight of his burdens, SO!!!!
no backing out now, BITCH
it’s your fault that u let your feelings run rampant and it’s ur fault for assuming his feelings
GET IT TOGETHER, SIS
“let’s just go to class”
later that night, when kangsung calls, u pull a jerk move and let it go to voicemail
kangsung [9:32 pm]: are u ignoring me :(((
y/n [9:36 pm]: no, i was busy
kangsung [9:36 pm]: are you still?
u look at the essay on your laptop screen that u just finished typing up
you’re,,,,, totally free for the night now
y/n [9:37 pm]: yeah
U LYING BITCH
U FEEL SO TERRIBLE
BUT YOU DON’T THINK UR HEART IS READY TO FACE KANGSUNG AGAIN AFTER WHAT HAPPENED TODAY
UR STILL TRYING TO PICK PIECES OF IT UP HNGGGGGGGGGG
and it’ll only take a night!!
just one
kangsung [9:38 pm]: ur still up for the cafe tomorrow right?
you thought it was just one anyway
but maybe you’ll need several
u KNOW ur vibes were all off during the cafe hangout/date/totally-not-date-because-kangsung-isn’t-interested-in-you
AND U REALIZE THAT UR VIBES ARE OFF FOR THE NEXT WEEK TOO
u thought u were subtle about it but
U THOUGHT WRONG APPARENTLY
“okay, you have to tell me what’s up”
just like that, u feel like throwing up your dinner
friday nights were always fun with kangsung, and tonight was supposed to be fun too
u had just eaten your own body weight of ramen and microwave bento boxes at 7/11 (all paid by kangsung hehehe) before taking a stroll in the park, but now u wish u’d had some self-restraint
because the way kangsung is looking at you right now, illuminated by nothing but the moon and the park lamps
u feel like you’re going to spill more than just your food
“i,,, can’t”
no shit you can’t
kangsung can make you fess up a lot, but there’s no way he’s weaseling this out of you
it’ll ruin your friendship forever and make things so awkward, and how the hell could you let yourself lose him when he’s such an important person to you now?
“we’re friends, right?”
his voice lowers into something soft and pleading, fists clenched at his sides
his hands are always like that at school, stuck at his side and too afraid to make contact with anyone
but it’s never like that with you
and when he unfurls one of his fists, extending it out to you, you register that this is supposed to be familiar territory
kangsung reaching out for you and your touch
your hand twitches, itching to take hold of his
but you can’t
“i’m sorry.”
the next 2 weeks are gruelling
you don’t hang out with kangsung once, nor do u guys call or text
THIS IS SO TERRIBLE
HOW DID THINGS END UP SO BADLY
all u do is MOPE now, LIKE UR FUCKING GRIEVING OR SOMETHING
UGH
WHO CARES ABOUT LEE KANGSUNG, STUPID CUTE STUPID FAIRY BOY
U HATE HIM AND HIS NICE HAIR
ur so busy malding over him that u don’t realize ur 2 seconds away from bumping into someone until u
u know
KNOCK INTO THEM
u have GOT to stop doing that
“woah, you okay? wait— y/n?”
aH
AHHHH
U KNOW THAT VOICE
“junhyung?”
ur so happy u could cry
u haven’t seen kangsung’s friends in the past 2 weeks either, and even though u aren’t that close to them, U STILL WEIRDLY MISSED THEM
“i haven’t seen you in forever. why haven’t you been at dance practice lately?”
haha,,,
hahahahahahaha,,,,,,,
siri how do u tell someone that ur going through a platonic break-up
“sorry if this is forward, but,,, did you and kangsung break up?”
,,,, hold on
HOLD ON, U DON’T THINK JUNHYUNG MEANS THE SAME BREAK UP THAT U DO
“wh—?! i— huh????”
junhyung exhales a laugh, and ur too sad to even glare at him
WHY DO CUTE BOYS ALWAYS LAUGH AT UR EXPENSE
“chill, he didn’t tell me anything. i’ve just noticed that he’s been moody lately, that’s all”
moody,,,, MOODY ???
WHY IS HE MOODY IF HE’S THE ONE THAT HASN’T TRIED CONTACTING U AT ALL
,,, OK MAYBE U HAVEN’T EITHER, BUT !!!!!
HE’S PROBABLY BUSY FLIRTING WITH HIS GIRLFRIEND, SO WHY WOULD U BOTHER THEM HUH !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
HE HAS NOTHING TO BE MOODY ABOUT （○｀Ｏ´○）
“we’re not dating. he’s interested in some other girl”
when junhyung looks at u like “??(´ﾟωﾟ｀*)”, u explain
“you know, that girl! tall, pretty, dyed red hair, she’s on the volleyball team. i don’t remember her name”
something clicks inside junhyung’s mind, almost comically obvious when his eyebrows raise in surprise
HMPH, U GUESS KANGSUNG HASN’T TOLD THEM EITHER
WHAT A FRIEND HE IS
“are you talking about minji?”
“yeah, her! that’s the girl kangsung’s into,,, not me”
u try not to sound so bitter over it, but u absolutely are
this is why u never pursue ANY OF UR CRUSHES
they always end in heartache and pain, and THIS
HnNnNnNnnG
junhyung pauses for a second before BURSTING INTO LAUGHTER
HE DOESN’T EVEN TRY TO HIDE IT FOR UR SAKE
HE L L O ?!?!?!?!?!?!?
“ARE U LAUGHING AT MY SUFFERING????”
junhyung takes a whole THIRTY SECONDS TO COMPOSE HIMSELF
THE NERVE OF MEN
THE AUDACITY!!!!
“dude, they’re cousins”
THEY’RE—
they’re what
“y/n, if you haven’t figured out kangsung’s real feelings yet, i don’t know what to tell you. good luck?”
junhyung pats your head before walking off, leaving u to DIE ON UR OWN
holy shit
HOLY SHIT
NOT ONLY IS IT SO FUCKING MORTIFYING THAT U THOUGHT KANGSUNG WAS DATING HIS OWN COUSIN, U ???
U BLEW THIS WHOLE THING OUT OF PROPORTION BECAUSE OF A MISUNDERSTANDING ?????
oh my god
oh my god holy shit
u need to fix this
U HAVE TO FIX IT NOW
U DON’T CARE IF KANGSUNG HAS DANCE PRACTICE, UR SOLVING THIS IMMEDIATELY OR U WILL IMPLODE ON THE SPOT
that’s the only thought powering u as u SWING THE DANCE STUDIO DOOR OPEN
“LEE KANGSUNG!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!”
aside for junhyung (who gives u a knowing grin), the guys all jump a bit (especially poor junseong, i am so sorry sweetie)
and the boy who has been the BANE OF UR EXISTENCE FOR MONTHS NOW STARES AT U IN SHOCK
u can feel ur courage slowly leaving u, BUT U CAN’T LET IT FIZZLE OUT YET
“FOLLOW ME OUTSIDE!!”
like a deer in the headlights, all kangsung does is look at u, no reaction whatsoever
u would go drag him by his collar, but u would NOT be able to face anyone in this room again if u said what was on your mind in front of them
ok fine
time to pull out the big guns
“IF U DON’T COME, I’LL NEVER FORGIVE U!!!!”
that gets him moving
,,, simp
BUT ANYWAYS
U KEEP STOMPING UNTIL U TWO ARE OUTSIDE, IN THE SAME PLACE U GUYS FIRST OFFICIALLY MET
school’s back entrance babey,,, talk about full circle
not to mention u guys are in the same position as that day too, like 10 feet apart and facing each other
and as u stare him down, drinking in his complexion like u haven’t seen it in ages (that’s what it feels like anyway)
you feel everything you planned to confess dissipate, all of it leaving you in an instant
kangsung’s eyes seem to study you too, his gentle gaze tracing your features like he’s missed you just as much as you’ve missed him
you can’t help but notice how weary he looks
you feel so horrible
you should’ve talked to him about this and just communicated
but it’s no use regretting that now
you have to fix things in the present
the past doesn’t matter here
and so, you hold your hand out and lay your heart bare
you know kangsung has no reason to accept this silent apology
and you know kangsung can so easily leave you right now and return to dance practice, where he should be
but he stays
kangsung slowly makes his way to you, hand hesitantly reaching out for yours
and when he gets close enough, you clutch his hand like it’s the only thing keeping you grounded
because, in a way, it is
“i like you. i like you so much, it scares me. i was wrong— i shouldn’t have been jealous when i saw you talking to that girl, who i know is your cousin now. i was stupid and childish, and i’m sorry i hurt you.
please keep reaching out to me. please keep depending on me. please…”
kangsung slips out of your grasp, and your heart aches something so terrible that you feel like you’re dying
“tell me again”
his words come out as a rasp, but all you can do is be relieved that he’s even speaking to you
“what?”
“tell me you like me again”
fuck every thought of “this is embarrassing” going through your head
it’s all muddled, completely lost in the pounding of your heart
and you barely recognize your own voice when you speak again
“i like you. and i don’t want to see you with anyone else.”
kangsung looks at you as if you’ve shot him
his eyes fill with tears, but the incredulous smile tugging at his lips screams of relief
u probably shouldn’t, but you hold his face in your hands, pressing your forehead against his
no one’s around anyway
“i like you”
(kangsung, sniffling) “i know”
“i really like you”
“i know, i know”
“do you?”
kangsung’s teary eyes search yours for a brief moment, and u almost think he’s gonna sob
instead, he huffs out a fit of laughter, all the while ur still CONFESSING UR HEAD OFF
“stop laughing, you jerk! hurry up and give me a proper reply because i’m seriously regretting this right now, and i really want to let go of you so i can shut up, but i’ve never seen you so up-close before and i can’t get enough of it—”
“okay, okay, i like you too! you’re the only person i’ve ever felt so… safe with. like i can just breathe around you. and... i don’t ever want to lose you. not again. i know i’m not the best person to date, but—”
“no, you idiot. it doesn’t matter if you’re not the best person, no one is! i like you for you, and even if i have to tell the truth every time we touch, i don’t care. i’ll deal with all of it, not just because i’m in love with you but because we’re friends!”
ok now you’ve done it
the tears are FULL-ON COMING NOW
u never knew kangsung was such a crybaby
but it’s fine
as long as ur the only one who wipes away his tears like this, you don’t mind
and as long as kangsung keeps leaning into your touch like this,, you’ll be happy
him, the guy who’s too afraid to let even his closest friends near him, silently pleading for your touch
lee kangsung’s gonna be the death of you
“i’m in love with you too. and i’ll keep reaching out to you for as long as you’ll let me.”
“forever. i’ll be here for you forever.”
kangsung all but wheezes, his laughter forcing a few stray tears down his cheeks
and when you press your lips to his face in response, u hear his breath hitch
then, he exhales shakily, hand resting on top of yours like he’s afraid you’ll take it, and everything you just professed, back
but you won’t, not now or ever, and somehow
you’ll make sure kangsung knows that too
“have me forever, then.”
author’s note: this was SO fucking cheesy but i think it fit since the mc had to spill their guts every time kangsung touched them so AHGDFJVHKBDF
this fic is inspired by oogami-san, dadamore desu !! i got the concept of kangsung’s condition from it :’))
