❛ could this be a trap ? ❜ (and ushijima to tendou before i drown you out again dbhjfv) princess bride starters | @giiants
tendou holds his index fingers up — side by side, far enough apart that he can imagine a string of electricity connecting them. he holds up two fingers & names them two endpoints of a scale. ‘ careful, ‘ he hums. ‘ this might be a trick question. ‘
he’s sixteen, then twenty, then twenty-two.
at that time, he would ask silly questions — would you rathers that either deepdive into absurdity or that intrude. example: would you rather have someone read your thoughts for an hour or see your entire search history ? communicate through emojis or never text again? if you had another hair color would it be? what kind of friendship is the best friendship? what do you wish your family did differently? what do you wish your friends did differently? what would it feel like to feel miserable every time you won?
there were never good answers to these questions.
he’s sixteen, then twenty, then twenty-two. sometimes tendou asks these questions to excavate answers he thinks he wants to hear or knows he doesn’t want to hear. he has always had the tendency to scatter pushpins in a circle around him, to see who might navigate past the hazards / who might be stopped / whom tendou can justify keeping at arm’s distance.
tendou is no longer sixteen, twenty, twenty-two. he refuses to play his old game, though he wants to. the game sometimes leaves a lingering sour taste that helps no one, so it . . . is something worth resisting.
sometimes he’s tempted to play again.
sometimes he forgets his old pattern trick questions entirely.
but today he asks ( in spanish ) : if you could live anywhere, where would you live?
it turns out : ushijima has apparently not forgotten the trick questions. tendou’s brow wrinkles; he figures that ushijima didn't mean to imply trapdoors & hostage situations & ducktape sorts of traps that may show up in manga. but they've agreed recently ( since they travel & are uncertain about next steps ) to talk for 15 minutes (when they manage to talk) in a language other than japanese.
it's a stupid agreement because tendou misses the feeling of japanese on his tongue, but it's easier to practice a language when there's someone who understands that you're confused so --
today they've settled on a rundown of spanish, & neither of them are really saying what they mean but
still, tendou translates: ' is this a trick question? ' from ' could this be a trap? '
the translation makes him dance a little in place, changing the distribution of his weight between left-right, right-left —- tendou deflects by tripping up the rhythm of his steps just enough that he can cut off ushijima's stride.
' absolutely could be a trap, ‘ he agrees. star-spread, tendou brings his arms to wide points & takes a standing split. ' you should tell me about that. what kinda trap are you thinking ? ' his fingers wiggle in the air - they do a terrible impression of the dances performed by inflatable men at car dealerships. tendou sometimes snags into moments where he smells a whiff of ushijima's imagination on the wind. it's usually a false-lead, but it's fun to entertain.
it’s also easier than answering too honestly. at sixteen, twenty, twenty-two, & even now . . . tendou snips away tethers at his feet. he answers from a distance & balloon-dips through conversation. it doesn’t help anyone.
ushijima is a bit of a monster, of a superhero, in the way that he doesn't stumble over pushpins or balloon choreography.
maybe that’s why it feels like a shit move to leave ushijima’s question unanswered. tendou runs a hand over the short crop of his hair. he has to reconsider what he was really asking ushijima before their language-practice fell flat.
' i mean. usually, yeah. but usually a trick question for me used to be . . . would you rather be right handed or give up volleyball? would you prefer a to speak spanish in japan or japanese in argentina? ' this is not entirely true . . . trick questions used to be intentional. & tendou hadn’t asked anything intentionally, but ushijima is right.
tendou asks a question, & he’s not prepared to know the answer.
remember: ushijima & tendou split ways once. they split ways twice. the idea of splitting ways three times feels like swallowing tree bark.
it’s a hard question, & tendou feels like a jackass for asking it without realizing so — for old time’s sake, he holds up his index fingers side-by-side. electricity pulses somewhere between. it sucks.
' yeah, i mean. i guess that's what i asked, isn't it? if you could live anywhere, where would you live? would you rather live in japan or here ? in poland or here ? in italy ? in argentina? thailand ? '
but he admits that he's been on edge the past few days. walking on tiptoes when he welcomes himself into ushijima's home, trying to pinpoint the minute that they have a conversation (again) about how they had previously tackled distance & again what distance might mean.
it’s hard to tell what patterns persist. what ambitions may have changed.
tendou cuts his tethers. ushijima builds foundations. tendou is growing older. ushijima is growing older.
it’s a trick question.
